A/N: So this is a stupid little flash fic that came to me while reading through the discussion about PoA and that pic of Harry holding on to Hermione while it looks like something bad is going on. We were saying that people (R/Hr and H/Hr shippers alike) are getting worked up about it, saying it's a shipper pic. This isn't really a Ron/Hermione fic, per say, there's no romance. Just the fact of it is stated. That's to say, is this were Harry/Hermione oriented, I could still read it. ;)

And thanks to ILuvRonniekins, a visitor at my site who thought up a line Harry says in this fic!

Disclaimer: All the characters and anything Harry Potter related belong to J.K Rowling and WB and whoever owns them now!

Soulless Lump

By Gillian-Marie

One evening Harry decided that he wanted to go visit Hagrid. He asked Ron and Hermione if they wanted to go with him.

"No, sorry, I can't," said Ron, "I have to finish this essay for Snape or I'm dead."

"I'll go," said Hermione, "Let me go get my cloak."

"Ok," replied Harry.

*

Five minutes later, the two of them were leaving Hogwarts to walk down to Hagrid's hut. Halfway there they passed a sign that read "Watch out for dementors if you're passing this way without anyone who likes you more than a friend." Harry and Hermione looked at the sign but said "meh" and kept on walking.

They were almost at Hagrid's hut when they noticed a dementor gliding out of the forbidden forest.

"Uh oh," said Harry, "Don't get caught, Hermione, or I won't be able to save you, seeing that I don't like you as more than a friend."

"I'll do my best, Harry," she replied.

They began to run towards the safety of Hagrid's hut, but to no avail. One of the dementors grabbed Hermione by the leg and she fell into the grass face first.

"Oh no!" she screamed. She flailed her arms trying to ward off the dementor. "Harry! I could use a patronus over here! Today would be good!"

"But Hermione, I can't help you! I don't like you as more than a friend!"

"Man! I forgot! That really does suck!" said Hermione, exasperated, but still trying to ward off the dementor. "I wish Ron was here! He likes me more than a friend! He could save me!"

Five minutes later, Hermione was still flailing her arms in protest of the dementor.

Hagrid came out of his hut when he heard the screaming from Hermione.

"Wha's all this commotion out 'ere?" he said.

"Hermione's being attacked by a dementor and I can't help her because I don't like her as more than a friend." replied Harry.

"Sucks to be her," said Hagrid, "That means only one person can help her: Ron Weasley!"

"Man, if Ron doesn't show up soon Hermione is going to be a soulless lump! But hey, what can I do about it!"

"You can go find Ron!" screamed Hermione.

"Good idea!" exclaimed Harry. He ran as fast as he could up to Gryffindor common room to find Ron asleep on his work.

"Wake up, Ron! Hermione's in trouble and the only person who can help her is someone who likes her more than a friend!"

"But Harry, I don't like her as more than a friend!" portested Ron.

"Now is not the time to be denying it, Ron!" scolded Harry, shaking his finger in Ron's face.

"Fine, fine! Lead the way!"

They ran as fast as Harry's short legs and Ron's long one's would carry them and when they reached the scene, Ron karate chopped the dementor on the head and it ran back into the forest.

Hermione stood up brushing herself off. "Thanks, Ron. Heh, and now I finally know you like me! Yay!"

"So you do, so you do," said Ron, nodding his end.

And so ends this stupid, stupid story.

A/N: So what do you think, awfully stupid, but pretty funny, I hope! =D