A/N: There are medical errors in this story. Please forgive me for the mistakes as I hadn't taken them under consideration before posting. Hopefully the content will still be worth your time.
Also, these characters do not belong to me.
Without a cloud in the sky, there was nothing to stop the sun from shining through the hospital window. The bright light however, did nothing to lighten the mood of one Detective Jane Rizzoli. She was sitting, or rather slouching, in her assigned bed. A blanket was thrown haphazardly around her waist and her eyes were downcast. With her gown pulled up, her left hand rested upon her abdomen. She looked down at her hand, at what was once underneath it. Despite the sun practically illuminating the woman, highlighting her in the center of the room, she was far from content. Somewhere inside, somewhere she hadn't even realized she could feel emotion, she was overcome by intense sorrow.
She'd wanted that baby. At first, she was confused by the idea of becoming a mother but it had grown on her. Now, the concept was a part of the past. The baby was gone. Beneath her palm, underneath the skin, there was no longer a living being within her. She couldn't believe the sense of loss that was encompassing her every thought and action. She thought the pain of losing Frost was one of the most difficult things she'd ever had to experience, but in this moment she realized that loss could come in many forms. What made it worse, she thought, was losing them both within such a short period of time.
Her gaze unwavering upon her stomach, still contemplating all that was and now could not be, Jane didn't know a separate set of eyes was watching her from the doorway. It wasn't until she saw another hand come into her line of sight, a paler one, that she realized she was no longer alone. Still, she didn't look up. Instead, she watched as the more feminine hand slid against hers, tangling their fingers together, leaving both palms to rest against her warm skin.
Despite the femininity of the hand clasping hers, it was no less strong, much like the woman herself. Jane knew Maura inside and out and she knew that if anyone were able to handle her grief, it would be her. In seconds, Jane was overwhelmed and tears were forming in her eyes, soon sliding down her cheeks. Silent sobs began to wrack her body. Instead of forcing them away altogether, she merely pushed them down, keeping the sounds of heartbreak to a minimum. She didn't want to lose complete control over her emotions.
And so the minutes passed, Maura's fingers linked with Jane's, both palms facing down. Maura let the Detective cry, knowing that it was rare for her to ever allow someone to see her in such a state. She felt the strong muscles ripple under her hand as she took in the sight of her best friend. In this moment, she was breaking and all Maura wanted to do was console her. She brought her left hand up to Jane's cheek. Her thumb wiped at the trail of salty moisture. She gripped Jane's fingers a little tighter, letting her know without a word that she was there, she was trying to help. It was in that moment when Jane's body stilled and her tears began to subside, even though her pain still felt devastatingly fresh. She took in their proximity.
Maura's skin suddenly felt very warm against hers, both along her stomach and her cheek. Her skin didn't normally feel quite this hot and it unnerved Jane. Was Maura not well, was she sick? Finally, wondering at the cause of this new sensation, Jane looked up slightly to meet the hazel of Maura's eyes. Their gazes connected and Jane could swear she felt her abdomen tighten. Maura didn't fail to notice the slight clenching under her palm. Thinking they were inappropriately close, Maura began to remove her hand from Jane's face and step back. Jane didn't allow it. Instead, her right hand moved swiftly to capture Maura's retreating wrist. Maura took in a quick breath and she turned her head slightly, analyzing the look in Jane's eye. She couldn't quite read it.
Before either woman fully comprehended the action, Jane abruptly pulled Maura in closer, bringing their faces close enough to breathe the same air. Jane didn't think about what she was doing. Her mind was surrounded by the sense of mourning and loss, so a part of her knew she wasn't thinking clearly. Maura merely stared at Jane, her expression filled with confusion and uncertainty. What exactly did Jane want from her?
Jane's eyes drifted all over Maura's flawless complexion and soon she was staring at the light pink of her friend's lips. She didn't want to feel sad anymore. She wanted something else to feel, something stronger, something good. Maura was the essence of everything good and right and true. She wanted to feel that, to taste it. She wanted that feeling to drown out all the misery. It only took a second for Jane's hand to move from Maura's wrist to her neck, and she used the leverage to pull the Medical Examiner down upon her.
Their lips met, and Maura simply didn't react. She didn't know what to do, what to feel. Jane noticed the reluctance but she didn't seem to take it to heart. She merely applied pressure against her friend's mouth and allowed the sensation of Maura's lips to melt into her. Not wanting to coerce the kiss into something that wasn't reciprocated, but not yet wanting to move away from how amazing it felt to be this close to her best friend, Jane moved her lips to the side. She kissed the corner of Maura's mouth. She dragged her own lips along Maura's cheek and jaw, kissing every inch of skin she could reach. Realizing that she wanted to explore more, so much more, Jane sat all the way up and released the hold she still had on Maura's right hand. She reached out to Maura's waist and pulled her against the bed, silently asking her, begging her, to climb up.
Maura didn't know what was happening, except that this was unchartered territory for them. She didn't move her body away entirely, but she forced her head back, so Jane's soft lips couldn't keep kissing her skin. She tried to catch Jane's eye, convey to her that this whole scenario was out of character for them, that she wasn't comfortable with this. What she saw glinting back at her was desperation. Jane wasn't one to ask for what she wanted because she believed it portrayed her as weak. So instead of asking with words, she merely looked at Maura with an expression of need. She needed this, with every fiber of her being; she needed to lose herself in the exquisiteness that was Maura Isles. And more than that, she needed Maura to want to give her this opportunity. She couldn't simply take it; it had to be given.
With Jane's eyes flashing up at her, Maura instantly knew she was in over her head. Yet, she couldn't find the will power to move away. With Jane's hands as support, she shifted her body and landed on top of Jane's form, essentially straddling her while Jane leaned back. Maura's skin-tight skirt rode up from the position and she was suddenly aware of the extra amount of thigh now on display. She felt awkward, unsure, and very uncomfortable. This wasn't them. This wasn't what normally occurred between her and Jane. Jane had never seen her in this position before, her thighs clinging to Jane's waist, her breath coming in rapid succession. She didn't know if she should be worried about the drastic change in Jane's eyes as she looked up at her, openly admiring Maura's body. The look the Detective was throwing her way was anything but familiar. It was the type of gaze that was normally reserved not for friends, but for lovers.
It shook Maura to her core.
Jane let her eyes candidly wander over every dip and curve of the woman on top of her. But it wasn't just any woman who was straddling her hips, sunlight cascading all around her from the nearby window; it was Maura. Jane took in the sight of her. Maura appeared very much like her confident, self-assured self, but there was more than a hint of uncertainty shining through her eyes. Jane didn't want to think about that. She just wanted to feel something other than the sad ache in her chest. If she could choose something in particular to take its place, it would be the delightful tightening in her stomach, the subtle throbbing in between her thighs, caused by none other than the beautiful Medical Examiner currently peering down at her.
So that's exactly what Jane did.
Maura took in a swift breath when Jane's fingers made contact with her thighs, just above her knee. The skin was even smoother than expected. Jane's slightly calloused fingers moved up slowly, her thumbs caressing the sensitive skin only meant for intimate touches. As her hands moved higher and higher, Maura's chest began to rise and fall rapidly. Jane was aware of Maura's reaction but she still wasn't sure if it was due to fear of the unknown, or arousal. Changing course, she moved her hands to her friend's hips, gripping them in the most delicious way.
Their eyes met. Jane never moved her gaze from Maura's as she pushed her hands beneath the designer blouse. The skin-to-skin contact along Maura's ribs caused Maura to part her lips in search of more oxygen. Jane watched with fascination as Maura's chest rose and fell in front of her, faster than before. She wanted to feel more of that particular part of her friend, an area always off limits to her, before now. Without hesitation, Jane traced the tender skin under her friend's breasts. Never in her wildest imaginings would she have thought she'd ever have Dr Maura Isles this close to her. The thought was intoxicating.
Before moving farther up Maura's breasts, Jane noticed Maura's hands at her sides. They were fisted in the blanket still wrapped around Jane's waist. Sliding her scarred hands down from underneath Maura's blouse, she met the tightly clenched fingers and eased them open. She skimmed their palms together. Maura eyed the movement, her breathing calming at the friendly gesture, if only to speed up once more as Jane gripped Maura's hands and roughly pulled her down. Maura landed directly above Jane, stomach to stomach, chest to chest, and eye to eye.
"Jane…" Jane's name floated from Maura's mouth as barely more than a whisper, her hot breath hitting Jane's skin in a delightful wave.
Jane waited for more words to come, but they didn't. She knew they were skirting a dangerous boundary but the idea of doing something never done before, something forbidden, tempted her. This was her best friend, yes, but this was also the strikingly gorgeous, sophisticated Medical Examiner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. She was well-known, well-respected, and even revered in her own right. She was worldly and cultivated. She was more than comfortable in her finances, she was unfathomably wealthy. She fell in love with handsome fugitives who broke the law for the greater good. Maura was a woman of an intriguing and complex nature, which as a whole, made her entirely intimidating. Given the chance to explore the ins and outs of this particular woman excited Jane. It took her mind off her feelings of loss and brought her face to face with the side of Maura she'd never seen before, the side of her friend that couldn't quite catch her breath as Jane allowed their lips to move increasingly closer together.
Right before Jane closed the distance between their mouths, their lips a paper's width apart, she halted her progress. She savored the heady feeling of Maura's breath mixing with hers, the heat of her body flowing down against her, even without their chests fully touching. She took note of their nearly aligned pelvises but Maura clearly avoided placing all her weight down on Jane's body, likely avoiding any sensitivity near Jane's earlier incident. Jane didn't like that thought, the recognition of the child no longer inside her, so she quickly grabbed Maura's hips and jerked them down. It brought her a distinct twinge of pain, but she ignored it. Stronger than the sensation of pain was the thrilling weight of Maura's waist completely against hers. Jane wanted this, intensely. She needed to know that Maura wanted it too, at least a little.
And so, she waited. She waited for Maura to decide whether or not to continue this stimulating dance. Jane didn't move her lips any further. She merely allowed the two of them to continue exchanging air until Maura made the next move.
It didn't take long for Maura to understand Jane's lack of pursual or her inner workings. After all, if there was anyone Maura knew, it was Jane. In a way, she was grateful for the cessation of Jane's ministrations, but she also realized that she didn't like what it meant: whatever happened next, it was on her. If she chose to pull away, to remove herself from Jane's hospital bed and leave the room, Jane wouldn't hold it against her. On the other hand, if she chose to rid themselves of the miniscule space between them, and follow through with a truly willing exchange of lips and tongues and so much more, the possibility of their friendship being ruined was also on her. The thought scared her, and not much brought fear to this woman.
"What are we doing, Jane?"
This time, when Maura's whispered words hit her ears, Jane could almost discern a hint of titillation in her tone. She laid her head all the way back down on the pillow beneath her, giving them a few inches of separate space. Jane dragged her hands up from Maura's waist and placed one palm along her cheek and the other along her heated neck. Her thumb moved over her friend's pulse point and Jane found that she enjoyed the steady beat just below the surface.
Jane locked their eyes together, unblinking. She answered Maura quietly, but with purpose.
"Living."
With a furrowed brow, Maura contemplated Jane's answer. She lifted her body just so and glanced down at Jane's stomach. With the hospital gown shrugged up, Maura was able to run her hand along the still exposed skin of the Detective's toned abdomen. Jane wasn't the only one who lost something, someone, today; Maura felt the loss as well. Although Maura wasn't expecting that particular response from Jane, 'living,' it made sense. Death surrounded each of them on an almost daily basis, today included but on a much more personal level. Perhaps a bit of living, a bit of excitement, would be good for them.
"Yes," she found herself saying, tilting her head up to meet Jane's deep brown eyes.
She didn't know if she'd regret the decision later but right now she wanted to feel more of the body below her, and she wanted Jane to explore her as well. She wanted to push the limits of their friendship and see what it was like. She didn't want to merely live in the comfortable bubble they'd created over the years; she wanted to challenge their foundation and risk it all, if only to see what it was like to do something completely new and utterly disorienting. And experiencing it with Jane, with her best friend, was the only way Maura knew she'd ever want to go outside of her comfort zone.
"Yes," Maura repeated, more determined this time, her eyes dropping to Jane's lips. When Jane had first kissed her before, she hadn't even known she'd wanted such a thing. Now, gazing at that perfect mouth, she couldn't imagine ever wanting something more. Maura brought her entire body down, allowing her full weight to fully encompass Jane's. Her hands and legs suddenly clung to her best friend. Just as the Detective's hands clasped at Maura's waist, Maura moved in and pushed her lips forcefully against Jane's.
The sensation was exhilarating.
Immediately, Jane wrapped her dominant leg around Maura's waist and Maura responded by grinding down into her. Jane released a deep, rumbling groan, the vibration reverberating along Maura's lips. Jane then proceeded to run her tongue along the softest mouth she'd ever felt and Maura instantly parted her lips, allowing, welcoming the intrusion. When their tongues collided for the first time, both women moaned into the other. How had they never done this before?
Deepening their kiss, Jane found her hands in much the same place as only moments before, just below Maura's breasts, skin on skin. She wanted to be slow, she wanted to explore with patience and tenderness, but somehow she knew they'd passed that point the second Maura agreed to push things further. And besides, Jane was hardly a patient person.
Gliding up over Maura's bra, not surprised to find lace, Jane pressed her thumbs to the material, creating friction against pert nipples. Maura felt the pressure instantly shoot down to her core. Knowing that Jane was the one causing the distinct flutter in between her thighs, Maura couldn't help but feel ignited from her stomach out. This wasn't just any person caressing her; it was Jane, the woman she'd do anything for and vice versa. It made each touch all the more powerful.
Maura's own hands began to wander, finding heat everywhere. Just as she was pushing the white material of Jane's gown up to reveal breasts that she desperately wanted to taste, Jane slipped under her bra and cupped the flesh in her palms. Maura gasped and lifted her head, causing their passionate kissing to end and her neck to become newly exposed. Jane didn't miss a beat. She saw the smooth expanse above her, practically begging to be devoured. She brought her lips up and placed heavy, open-mouthed kisses below Maura's ear. The combination of Jane's deft fingers along her nipples and her wet mouth on her neck, Maura was quickly left breathless and trembling. She began to thrust her hips against Jane's. As soon as Jane registered the movement, she found herself responding in kind, but with an upward direction. She ignored any spasm of pain the motion caused because quite frankly, clinging to Maura, grinding together in a perfectly discovered rhythm, was worth any amount of pain.
"Shit, Jane," Maura practically purred her name, not even aware of the expletive she'd released.
Hearing Maura curse was a ridiculous turn on for Jane and she quickly dug her teeth harshly into Maura's neck. Maura's response was almost violent, burying her fingernails into the skin along Jane's scalp. Although it hurt enough to cause the Detective to release a low hiss, it didn't fail to make Jane want Maura even more. She didn't know the woman she'd been close friends with for all these years could be anything but calm and gentle. Yes, she knew there was sometimes fervor in her actions, but not quite like this.
"Maur," Jane uttered, creating a trail with her tongue up to Maura's ear. She traced the outline and nipped where she could. There were other, more sensitive areas than this, which she wanted to taste, to savor. Making quick work of unclasping Maura's bra, she went to remove the soft blouse. Once Maura realized what Jane wanted, she quickly complied, tossing the garment beside the bed. Her bra soon followed. As soon as Maura began to lie back down, Jane stopped her. Jane's eyes were intense as she marvelled at just how magnificent Maura was. The sun was lower in the sky than it was when Maura first entered the room but still, the remaining sunlight shone down on her from behind in the most glorious way.
"God, you look…" Jane started, hands currently resting on the bed, not touching the woman she was completely caught up in. "You look…"
Unable to find the proper words to articulate her utter amazement at Maura's perfectly honed body, Jane simply allowed her actions to do the talking for her. She quickly removed the scratchy hospital gown from her upper body and wasted no time in yanking Maura down. Their chests collided, eyelids fluttered momentarily, and their mouths met yet again. Their passion was heightened at the feeling of their breasts pressed so intimately together.
When Maura had removed the top half of her clothing, Jane's leg had fallen from her waist. Now, Jane wrapped both her legs around Maura and clung to her. The muscles in her thighs were strong and very capable of holding Maura tight. Maura found it sexy how powerful Jane was, even somewhat injured. She'd always known Jane to be reserved when it came to discussions of sex, but she secretly suspected that when caught up in the act itself, Jane would lean more toward bold and confident than she cared to admit. Maura was quite happy to be found correct in her suspicions.
Rocking back into their previous thrusting rhythm, their nipples scraped together, initiating the release of slight moans in the sterile room. Jane took note of their remaining articles of clothing: Maura still had her skirt around her waist, perhaps something underneath, and she herself was still wearing a dark pair of underwear. She wanted everything gone, without a single piece of material between them, but Jane couldn't wait any longer. Loosening her hold on Maura's waist, she gave herself enough space to maneuver her left hand quickly down heated skin. Along the way, she felt a hint of sweat gathering. She took pride in it, knowing that her own skin had a thin, matching layer.
Jane's fingertips brushed against yet more lace beneath Maura's skirt, yet it was incredibly delicate. She briefly wondered if the color matched the discarded bra from before, and then laughed internally. Of course it did, this was Maura after all. Jane's lips formed a small smirk as she continued to push into Maura's lips, their tongues still duelling, still enjoying the new exploration of one another. Meanwhile, Jane slipped her hand into the pool of wetness between Maura's thighs and growled at how much moisture she found. She wanted to dive to where her hand was now moving against extremely slick folds. She wanted to know exactly what Maura tasted like, what she smelled like. She wanted to drown in her, and at this moment, Jane knew it was a distinct possibility.
Maura more than noticed the movement between her legs, she honed in on it. She began to grind harder, hoping to gain more friction. She moved her own hand to Jane's navel, careful of her position, and dipped below the ruined cotton.
"You feel amazing," Maura mumbled, her thoughts forming into words as she dropped her mouth down to capture a nipple between her teeth.
At first, Maura alternated between nibbling and sucking, delighting in being able to touch Jane in such a way. But when her teeth came down just a little harder than expected, shocking the brunette into gasping, Jane responded by swiftly pushing deep inside Maura. The honey-blonde arched her back and she cried out. She wasn't expecting it, but she wasn't upset by it either. Feeling Jane inside her was extraordinary. It wasn't just the pressure of skillful fingers moving against her in just the right way, it was the fact that it was Jane's fingers in particular. It was Jane, her loyal, protective Jane, who was bringing her incredible pleasure. With hooded eyelids, Maura studied her best friend. Her cheeks were flushed, her lips were parted, and her breathing was uneven. They were all features Maura was certain were reflected on her own face. Jane caught her gaze. Maura grinned mischievously down at her before rapidly driving two fingers into Jane's core.
"Fuck!" Jane grunted the word, eyes slamming shut.
Hearing Jane deliver such a husky, rough sound inadvertently caused Maura's inner walls to tighten quickly around Jane's fingers for a moment before releasing again. Jane didn't fail to notice. She forced her eyes open.
"You liked that, didn't you?" She asked Maura the question without any cockiness. She was only curious, wanting to know what type of reactions she could stir from the Medical Examiner. Not one to back away from a direct, personal question, Maura answered with sincerity.
"Yes."
Jane propelled her thighs up then, her legs still wrapped around Maura's waist, effectively driving Maura's dextrous fingers as far as they could go. She began to move up and down with more speed, more purpose. Maura instantly matched her thrust for thrust. Their rhythm was so intuitively their own: deliberate, intense, and fully in tune with one other. The angle of their hands was awkward and somewhat difficult to manage due to Jane's legs wrapped securely around her friend, but neither wanted those legs to move even an inch. It was erotic and extremely possessive, the way her thighs were clenched and her ankles were linked. She wasn't letting Maura go anytime soon.
Leaning her lips in to graze along Maura's ear, Jane began to whisper hotly against her skin.
"You feel so fucking good inside me, Maur." She took a deliberate pause, awaiting the anticipated constriction around her fingers. She wasn't disappointed. Maura really did enjoy the sound of a curse falling from Jane's lips. Jane instantly took advantage of this and continued her foul-mouthed whispers.
"You are so goddamn gorgeous."
She felt the stiffening again. It caused an identical response in Jane's own body, her inner walls clamping down briefly upon Maura's fingers. It was a domino effect really, how every sound and touch Maura made caused Jane's arousal to amplify.
"Ever denying this thing between us, it was bullshit. I should have made a move on you years ago. I should have prevented you from dating all those assholes. They were all so undeserving." Jane placed a few more open-mouthed kisses along Maura's neck and jaw. "I never consciously fantasized about you Maur, but I did dream of you."
Maura's interest piqued. Their bodies picked up a quicker speed, moving hurriedly together, fingers advancing, beginning to curl with each push inside.
"Tell me what you dreamt of." Maura didn't ask, she told. Before Jane could respond, Maura rubbed the pad of her thumb along Jane's hypersensitive clit for the first time, and the Detective lost her train of thought.
"Fuck, Maura!" Her voice cracked with lust.
Jane copied Maura's touch and brought her own thumb to Maura's clit. She liked being able to mirror Maura's movements, experience the same thing at the same time.
"Tell me, Jane. Tell me what you used to dream of." Maura's voice did not crack, but it was distinctly lower in timbre than normal.
It was difficult for Jane to focus on forming words, considering their nonstop rhythm, constantly escalating in passion. But Jane continued, unable to stop her own moans in between the words.
"In the first dream, I fucked you in your office. I woke up in shock. I had to make myself forget the mental image of you… bent over your desk, me behind you."
Jane was panting now, her muscles straining. She knew Maura was experiencing the same pain, mixed with pleasure. Jane began to feel Maura's midsection tense. She was close; they both were.
"It was months before I had another dream, and it was a bitch of one too. I couldn't get it out of my mind like before."
Maura's fingers and thumb were persistent against Jane, never letting up. As soon as she felt Jane's back arch, she knew they were together, riding hastily toward the same sensation.
"You fucked me that time, Maur, but not with your hands. You used your tongue." Jane was starting to shake, her orgasm on the brink. "You used your tongue and I couldn't- I couldn't- God, Maura, don't stop!"
"I'm not stopping, Jane. I'm never stopping," Maura's reply was ragged and broken, her entire body on edge as she allowed the burning in her muscles to carry on. "I'm close, Jane. Look at me, don't close your eyes."
Jane did as she was told. When the ripples of climax were mere seconds away, both women knew they were about to experience a fire unlike ever before, because every partner before this moment was simply inadequate in comparison. The tension between Jane and Maura had always been electric, from the very beginning, ever increasing.
"Fuck," Jane had to fight her body's desire to turn her head. Instead, she focused intently upon the stunning hazel peering down at her, pupils dilated and eyelids heavy from exhaustion. "Fuck… Maura!"
They came together, a breathtaking combination of forceful muscle spasms, loud moans, and wave after wave of unbelievable heat that surged blindingly hot from their cores out to their limbs. And through every twitch and jerk of muscle, neither looked away. Each woman watched the other come thoroughly undone as a gush of wetness flowed out and covered two overexerted hands. The arousal was silky and smooth, and equally thrilling, knowing the cause behind it.
Jane was left in awe of Maura, still hovered above her. Having just watched Maura at the very peak of pleasure was something Jane knew she'd never forget. More than that, she knew she'd want to see her go through it again, and in every way possible. She only hoped that Maura would feel the same. Before she could shift their positions or ask what Maura thought of all this, Maura dropped down and placed a soft kiss upon her lips. It was gentle, reverent, and altogether unexpected. Jane somehow thought Maura was going to jump up, get dressed, and leave her in a heap of confusion. On the contrary, Maura hadn't even removed her fingers from within Jane and Jane realized neither had she. They were still very much connected.
"You look unusually contemplative, Jane. What are you thinking?" Maura inquired, an eyebrow slightly raised. Her voice had returned to its regular tone. It almost made Jane sad; she was hoping to hear that deep rasp at least one more time.
"I'm incredibly lucky to have ever met you, Maura. I hope you know how much I've come to…" She paused for a moment before pressing on, her eyes downcast at the end. "Adore you."
Maura was quiet for the longest time. Jane eventually felt her friend remove her fingers from in between her legs. She closed her eyes, immediately feeling empty within. Deciding it was a good idea to do the same, Jane pulled out of Maura as well. Maura sighed audibly, and then brought her very wet hand to her lips. She waited until Jane looked up before enticingly licking them clean. Jane watched, enraptured.
"I adore you too, Jane." Maura smirked at the Detective. "Especially the way you taste."
Jane released a frazzled breath. Taking a cue from Maura's book, she began to move her fingers to her own mouth before stopping and instead bringing them to Maura's supple lips.
"Would you like a taste of yourself?"
Maura didn't even think twice before wrapping her lips around Jane's index finger and applying a small amount of suction. Watching Jane's expression, she did the same to her other fingers, enjoying the affect she clearly had over the other woman. When she was done, Maura eyed Jane before finally rising from the hospital bed to straighten her now excessively wrinkled skirt. Topless, she moved to retrieve her bra and blouse and put them back on. Jane watched her the entire time.
Once she'd composed herself to the most acceptable level possible, Maura brought Jane's hospital gown over and handed it to the brunette. Jane threw it on and began to tie the waist shut, but Maura's hand reached out to stop her. Their stances very much like earlier in the afternoon, with Maura standing beside the bed and Jane slouched against the pillows, the Medical Examiner gently placed her palm over her best friend's abdomen. She didn't look up for a long while. It wasn't until her cheeks were stained with tears that Jane noticed Maura was crying, silently.
"Hey, hey," she placed her left hand over Maura's right and squeezed. She was scared to ask the question but she knew she had to. "What's wrong?"
Maura, ever so slowly, bent down and placed a kiss just beside their hands. She stayed there, breathing in the very addicting scent that Jane carried with her everywhere she went. Still looking down, Maura replied.
"When you first told me you were pregnant," her voice caught in her throat before Maura swallowed and continued. "When you first told me, my original reaction was completely out of character for me. I didn't understand why but I found myself overwhelmed with the desire to kiss your stomach. Actually, I wanted to kiss below your stomach, where the baby would have grown. It was irrational. I knew there wasn't even a fetus there at that point, but I felt it all the same. And I didn't dare mention it to you because you and I have always had very distinct lines around our friendship. It's always been clear: we're friends, nothing more, and nothing less. We're close friends, yes, but we've never been the kind of friends to allow kisses to be placed upon intimate body parts. Now, when the lines have finally been blurred, something I didn't even know I wanted to happen before today… It's too late." Maura caressed the warm skin along the back of her hand. "It's gone now, and I never got to kiss it."
Feeling another tear escape her eye, Maura wiped it away and shook her head. She didn't know what else to say. It wasn't long before she felt Jane tug her hand, asking her to look up. Pensive hazel met compassionate brown.
"Will you stay here overnight with me? I think we could both use the company."
Maura appeared as though she was considering it, but something was holding her back.
"Jane, where do you and I go from here? You're still my best friend and I don't want to lose you."
Jane was thinking much the same thing herself.
"I don't know what happens next, Maur. But you're my best friend too, always. How 'bout we just take it a day at a time and see what happens?"
"No." Maura determinedly shook her head, looking down at their hands yet again. "No, we can't just take things a day at a time anymore because days are constantly ripped from us without any fair warning, and I don't want another day to go by without being able to kiss any and every part of your body that I want." She looked up at Jane. "I don't want anymore lines between us, Jane. I want what we just had, and more. Do you- do you want that?"
Maura tried hard to seem confident, but her uncertain hopefulness was shining right through. Jane was more than scared; she was terrified. But Jane Rizzoli didn't run from fear, she faced it head on. She sat up and pulled Maura into her personal space. Her scarred hand found purchase along the delicate planes of Maura's cheek. She thought of everything they'd ever been through together throughout the years and how it'd all come to a head on this particular day, the day they lost the child they were going to raise together. Today was bittersweet; it marked both an end and a beginning, if she let it.
"I want you, Maura."
Jane felt anticipation linger in her chest at the prospect of all that the future could hold between them. Sending a silent goodbye, and thank you, to the life that was taken only hours ago, she gazed at the woman in front of her. For the first time, she saw Maura in an entirely different light: she saw her best friend looking upon her with a strong sense of love, and not a single line or boundary could be seen between either of them.
They were never meant to be there in the first place.