Prologue

The room is enormous, with scuffed wooden floors and pale yellow walls. A massive whiteboard with three markers and an eraser in its tray covers about half of the right wall. In the left wall near the back is an arched, hazelnut-colored door with a shiny brass doorknob. An identical door is set in the rightmost part of the back wall. The floor in the very middle of the room is covered by a lavender rug, on top of which sits two overstuffed easy chairs – one a deep azure and the other burgundy red – with a little wooden table in between. The table holds only two sheets of lined paper and a sharp pencil. A roll of masking tape sits on the burgundy chair. Other than that, the room is empty.

Of course, that is about to change.

Noises can be heard from behind the door on the left, and said door opens. A tall girl wearing a long sky blue tunic and navy blue jeans walks casually into the room, her short brown hair bobbing slightly as she turns around to address the person behind her.

"Come on, Iceland. It isn't too bad. Trust me on this one," I say, holding the door open for the silver-haired nation. Then I look around more. "Well, okay, Poland might have a heart attack when he sees this place, but it can be fixed. Anyway, I've already signed everything. I own this place now."

Iceland sighs and follows me in. "You're right about Poland," he says, nodding at the room in general. "But you've already bought it. So what am I really here for?"

"You're here because Eesti's out with Fin today at some festival, and I'm scared of how Hungary would react to the rules. I don't need her twisting this into some yaoi party. And you're my third favorite country, so I picked you to help me with the rules."

"Thanks," he says sarcastically.

"You're welcome," I answer as I sit in the azure chair, choosing to ignore his tone. "Let's just list the rules. Here, can you write them down please?" Iceland shrugs and pulls the little table closer to the burgundy chair where he is now sitting. He writes "Rules" on the top of one of the papers in neat cursive.

"Good. I like your handwriting. But anyway, we first owe the readers an explanation."

"And there goes what little remained of the fourth wall."

"Don't worry, Ice. It's fine. And the fourth wall was doomed anyway. Can we get on with it now?" I don't wait for him to answer but instead continue. "This story is dedicated to letting readers ask the countries questions or request they do something. I got the idea from Shoujo Fan Fiction's 'Fan Mail.' The difference is that this may have a little bit more of a plotline sometimes, like now. Now, first and foremost, remember that this is T-rated. I'll try to remember all the stuff you can't do for one of these, but even if I forget something, don't be stupid. Anyway, first actual rule: yaoi is allowed, I mean, it's Hetalia; it can't be avoided. Just nothing too weird, okay? And no incest. That means no Americest, Germancest, Itacest, NorIce-"

"Thank you."

"Anytime, Icy. Also no SwissLiech, USUK, Franada, China x any of the Asians, Belgium x Netherlands, or France x either Italy is allowed. Am I forgetting any?"

"I don't think so, but you might be. The point is no incest, adoptive or otherwise, unless you count FrUK. Britain's not going to like that, Luna."

"Well, I'm already taking away USUK. I have to give the yaoi nuts something to work with or Hungary will never stop annoying me about it. And she has the frying pan."

"And you're the author."

"You know what? Let's just move on. Just don't take the FrUK too far, people, okay? I need Britain somewhat sane. Now, going on, as much as I love Chibitalia x Holy Roman Empire, you can't go and annoy Germany about possibly being HRE because I have no idea how to respond to that. And we don't want to upset Italy. He's rather annoying when he's upset. Thirdly, I want to stress what is allowed request-wise. If I get a review saying, for example, 'Hey Luna, I'd love to see these Hetalia characters in a Hunger Games,' then I'll try to write a oneshot. If I love the idea enough, I may steal it for an entire story. Otherwise all of the allowed things are pretty basic – general dares, pranks, et cetera. Disallowed things are pretty much already listed. Just don't go swearing worse than Romano or asking for M-rated stuff and you're probably good."

"And if you ask for anything too terrible, she might just ignore all of your reviews and requests from then on," Iceland says passively.

"Eh? I wasn't going to do that, but I suppose it makes sense. So yeah, what he said. Oh, one last thing. If you want to come in and give a character a hug or something, that's all well and good; in fact, it's encouraged, but I'll need you to describe yourself however you want to be represented and give me a general overview of temperament so I can write you. Also, it's nice to have first names. I don't mind if they're pseudonyms, but I don't like writing 'kittenspuppiesunicorns!2348 says…' all the time. So if you don't mind signing your review with a name, it would be appreciated. Thank you! You got all that, Ice?"

"Yeah. Denmark seems to like making me his secretary sometimes, so I can write pretty fast."

"Aw, that's Denmark for you. Now come on, post the rules on the wall over by the whiteboard. Then we can start shopping so we can have this place fixed up for next time."

"What? I never agreed to that," Iceland says as he goes to post the rules. "Go use Poland."

"Either you're shopping with me or I'll write you calling Norge 'Big Brother' a lot."

"What store are we starting at?" Iceland sighs as he walks back out the door we came in through, pulling out his car keys.

"How about Pier 1? I really want those chairs." I pause before leaving the room myself. "See you later, guys! Leave us lots of requests! Don't forget the little guys!" I call back before shutting the door behind me.

AN: I'm so excited about this! Oh, disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, the country of Iceland, Pier 1 Imports, the Hunger Games, or really anything of note. Anyway, review with any requests or questions that follow the guidelines. I'll update as often as possible. Thanks, and enjoy the show!