Disclaimer: Naruto belongs not to me.

Twenty-Five Ways to Make Tenten Kill You...and Rock Lee

1. Steal all of Tenten's scrolls and weapons and plant them at Naruto's house.

2. Watch as she beats up Naruto for 'taking' her weapons.

3. Tell everyone in Konoha that she had a transsexual surgery and that she's actually a guy.

4. When interrogated, I mean, asked, tell her that Lee said that.

5. Watch from a tall tree as Hinata restrains her from killing Lee.

6. Sneak into her house and replace all her practical hair bands with pink frilly ones.

7. Do the same with her clothes, just replace them with frilly dresses.

8. Replace all her clothing with green spandex if there's no frilly dresses to be found.

9. Bake her a frilly, pink cake and write 'Congrats on Getting your Period!' on it.

10. Once again, blame Lee.

11. Smirk in stoic manner as you watch if you're Neji or Sasuke. If not...what the hell, laugh like there's no tomorrow.

12. Replace her shampoo with hair dye. Pink, preferably.

13. Watch as she frantically runs from store to store to find brown hair dye.

14. Replace her shampoo with something sticky like liquid caramel.

15. When she goes somewhere in the village, gawk and ask her if she's cosplaying a sundae.

16. Give her a frilly valentine and say...it's from Gai.

17. Watch as she sinks into depression and attempts to kill herself.

18. Hug her and say 'Happy day!' If you're Neji or Sasuke, just say 'Happy day. Oh joy.'

19. Eat a bag of potato chips. And crunch 'em.

20. Loudly.

21. Spread the rumor that she is secretly dating Sasuke.

22. Watch as she throws her weapons at the 'Sasu-sama Fan Club' members.

23. Launch whip cream at her from a tree when Lee's nearby.

24. Remember, Lee is your friend. Once again, blame him.

25. Show this list to her.

Tenten's Reaction

"..." Tenten stared at the list Neji held out to her. Shock had obviously taken its toll on her.

"WHO THE HELL WROTE THIS GODDAMN LIST?!"

Or not.

"...I'm going to track down this person..." Tenten said. Her eyes blazed with anger. "AND STAB HER TO DEATH!" She tapped her chin. "Ah, why not? AND I'LL KILL LEE TOO!!"

She ran towards the village, prepared to hunt down the author of the list.

Neji ran a hand through his black hair and smirked. "Good thing she didn't notice that this was in my handwriting."

Hyuuga Neji: Prodigy, jounin, and Dark Lord of Tenten Anger.

Beware the Neji. He'll write lists to piss you off... Please review and tell me what you think. Dedicated to HarvestMoonRacoon for inspiring me with her "30 Ways" series!