I started a joke, which started the whole world crying
But I didn't see that the joke was on me,
I started to cry, which started the whole world laughing
Oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me
"Have you gone so low that now you're trying to sell your soul for money?"
"Well what choice do I have?!"
For a moment, she swallowed and easily regretted her sudden outburst. It was the same question she asked on her coronation day. There was no one else in the room and everything flashed before her eyes. Not again.
"I have nobody! And who's dumb enough in the world who would ever care for me? Leave me alone, I'm trying to have a life here!"
"And this, this is what you call a life? How pathetic you've become."
"You have no idea..."
"No, really. I pity you. Remember when the real Kemurikage showed up and took away your-"
"STOP! PLEASE!"
"The spirits took away your bending for what you did. Of course, you think you're brave enough? Trying to impersonate a spirit? Your mother was right, just like your father, you're desperately trying to make it big when in fact-"
"STOP TALKING!"
She covered her ears, shut her eyes closed and was nearly hyperventilating.
"History repeats itself, doesn't it? Your sisters left you just like those two traitors did. It's just that this time, things are quite different. You became a prostitute in the Caldera just to survive. Who would've thought? The prodigy, the crown princess... has fallen out of grace... powerless, filthy, pathetic."
She replied with nothing but tears as she stared at herself down in disgust. She was clothed in rags, legs covered with scars and bruises. Her braided hair looked disastrous and had lost its luster. Her face has sunken and it didn't look the same as before, it was covered in filth, just like how her nails ate dirt. She had lost some teeth in her mouth for selling it, and her lips were cracking apart. Although under all of that, every guy she slept with still praised her for her natural beauty and physique.
"You could've saved yourself, you know. Well, not really. Oh how the tables have turned, Zuko was lucky enough to have Iroh because if it wasn't for that old man, he would have landed the same fate as you. Hopeless."
She balled her hands into a fist and choked her sobs. That until the door slammed open.
"You, you're up."
She stood instantly and wiped her face. The innkeeper walked over, grabbed her by the collar and was dragged Azula forcefully outside.
"I... I don't understand. What are you doing to me?!"
The innkeeper opened the back door, then threw Azula outside onto the walls of the narrow alley.
"I beg you! Have mercy on me, please! I have nowhere else to go!" She knelt and pleaded.
The lady grabbed a pail of cold water then splashed it all over her poor body. Azula gagged and tried to catch her breath.
"I'm making things faster, the customer's waiting! What were you doing the whole time?! You're a mess for god's sake, dry yourself and dress up!"
The lady grabbed a towel from behind and tossed it at her face.
She sighed in relief, she thought she was going to get fired.
"Show off... Why does she have to do all of that when you could've just gotten yourself in the shower?"
Her roommate butted in and offered her hand for a lift, which Azula hesitantly took to pull herself up.
"I'm not going to ask if you're okay, because obviously, you're not. Have you taken pills yet?"
Azula couldn't take all of her incessant nagging, she was just like Ty Lee.
"Yes, I have, Riki. If you excuse me..."
"You always sound so formal, it's even hard to believe that you're a scum of the street like the rest of us..."
How dare she say that in front of her face? Azula pursed her lip and refrained herself from biting back. She drifted away from her roommate and left for the dressing room.
Hurriedly, she stripped herself naked from the muddy, wet rags that she wore and scrubbed her body vigorously with the towel. She walked over to the front of the mirror then removed the tie that kept her braid together, struggled to brush her hair, sprayed on some perfume and licked her chapped lips.
She rummaged through the dresser for a set of laced lingerie until the innkeeper came to barge in again.
"Where is she? Oh, there you are. Come." She took Azula by the hand and took her outside.
"Wait!"
"You're going to get naked anyway! He's been waiting for ten minutes, I don't want to lose any customers!"
She broke from her grip and covered her breasts with one hand, the rest of her body with the other. Her cheeks turned red as she received several stares of disgust from the other guests along the unkempt hallways of the inn. At that moment, she wanted to die from shame. If only they knew who she really was, it would've been worse. Funny how this so-called conqueror who once infiltrated the walls of Ba Sing Se, now gets her own walls penetrated repeatedly by men whom she didn't even know.
"You're lucky, this customer is not like the nasty fire nation citizens you meet on a daily basis. Have fun."
The innkeeper opened the nearest room to the left side of the lobby and pushed her inside. She uncovered her bare body as soon as the door was slammed shut, stood still and refused to stare at him.
"Please, take a seat and drink with me."
Azula had no choice but to take his offer. Although she knew who he was, Admiral Chan, the father of that imbecile bastard she met on Ember Island a few years ago. A few years ago it seemed, and now she let his father climb inside her body for a few amount of fortune.
"You look so young, what brought you here?"
"Why do you care?" She whispered to his ear with her hands placed on his shoulders, her legs were spread wide open as she sat above his lap.
The Admiral reached for her lips, his hands holding her slim waist while Azula's hands started to work and unbutton his shirt. The kiss lasted quite long, that until the Admiral started to touch her body. She moaned and panted as his hands were cupping her breasts, his fingers stimulating its peaks in a circular motion.
"Doesn't look like you're from here, you're too good to be true..."
She released a devilish smirk and kissed him once more to shut him up. He was already touching her downwards when she began to unzip his pants, but before she could even pull it down, the old Admiral stopped and began to dress up.
She sat back and leaned her spine against the couch. She closed her eyes and tried to catch her breath.
"Pardon me... I remember that it's my son's graduation tonight."
She let out a short laugh and turned her gaze at him, "Right, your son? You do look quite familiar to me, Admiral. Chan's the name, isn't it? I remember sleeping with him once... But don't fret, I can't tell who's better since we didn't even finish."
She liked seeing his face overflow with confusion,
"How did you..."
She placed her arm over his shoulders and leaned close to his side as she whispered to him, "I see the resemblance. Don't you? Both of you are good at heating things up."
He suddenly grabbed her arm which was resting across the back of his shoulder, aggressively took it to the front and threw her body flat on the cold floor. He knelt above her and kept her restrained.
"Who are you?!"
Nothing went in her mind but just another glimpse of the past. It felt just like the way she fell flat against the metal floors at the Boiling Rock, after Ty Lee chi-blocked her.
"No you miscalculated! You should have feared me more!"
"Answer me!" The admiral tightened his grip.
She chose not to budge, with her face still facing the floor, she smiled out of frustration. She could not believe herself, how far ruined she'd gotten. Out of impatience, he stood abruptly, grabbed his wallet, threw some money over her naked body and stormed out of the room.
"You could've tried harder. You were not as clever as you are before. What an embarrassment you just made out of yourself."
A tear escaped from the corner of her eye, she rolled over and lied down facing the ceiling. She never expected this to happen in her life, not even a slim chance, she was so disgusted of herself. Agni knows how much she had prayed for forgiveness, to spare her from this. She still hoped.
And I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.