Drip. Drip. Drip.
Another day.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Another class.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Another round of curious glances.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Another fit of depression.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Another convulsive squeeze of the stomach.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
I glared out the foggy window pane at the offending rain, pouring down in torrents from the darkened sky, reflecting perfectly my mood, as Forks weather always seems to.
You know, it wasn't normal this depression I was feeling, this gut wrenching pain, not the normal pain of young love ripped away. No. The pain didn't stem so much from his leaving me. It did seem as though someone had died, at least by the way I acted, like a loved one had passed away and now I'm in mourning, and in a way he had died that day, the Edward I loved. Perhaps my Edward never really existed, perhaps he never really loved me, but my Edward would always be real to me, and to me when my perception of him shattered that day, my Edward died.
But still, it wasn't just that that makes me feel the way I do. They were my family, my friends. It was as though they filled some hole in my life that I hadn't realized existed before I met them, and now that they were gone it gaped open, spilling out my lifeblood, leaving me empty and hollow inside. It was as though a meteor had passed into my view of the sky, blinding me with its beauty, and now that it had passed I could no longer see the stars.
And here I am, sitting in a class filled with people, whole happy warm people who can't even begin to imagine what it feels like to have a huge chunk taken out of your life, to be missing a puzzle piece and know exactly what it is but not be able to put it together. Thus is the sad existence of Bella Swan.
"Hey, Bella?"
My head snapped up and I turned to look at Mike, who was leaning over to me from across the aisle. I was the only one here without a lab partner sitting beside me. Mike had offered initially, but he and Jessica must have worked things out because he had stopped being so attentive to be lately, or maybe the super-emo-depressed-gonna-kill-you-in-your-sleep-a fter-i-finish-crying look made him back off. It's funny how everyone else's little problems seemed to become insignificant. Maybe I was being self-centered, but I honestly couldn't bring myself to care all that much most of the time.
"Yes?"
"Um, well, Jess and I are going to Seattle this weekend and we were wondering if you wanted to join us. She wants to do some shopping and um…"
I don't particularly want to go shopping, especially with overtalkative and forever bubbly Jessica, but it was probably a good idea to get out of the house, show Charlie I was at least trying with my life and all.
"Sure, I'd like that." I replied quietly.
"Great!" Mike beamed, "Thank you so much, Bella! I'll be really good having another girl there. I'm not too overly fond of shopping and all."
Neither am I. Oh well, it can't do me any harm.