Would Have Been
A Fruits Basket fanfic by Rabid Lola
A/N: This…is odd. I don't know why.
If there's anything weird, OOC, or just plain not canon…I don't know much about Fruits Basket. Yet. I don't own it, after all.
He stopped at the sight of her, startled to see her in this part of the compound.
Was it she? Frowning, he peered a little closer, from his hampered view in the shadows. He didn't want to be seen, and even though half the time he was ostentatiously loud and bright, there were other times when he specialized in walking right in front of you yet you wouldn't notice him at all.
Yes, it was she. He'd seen her picture often enough, on the shelf in Hatori's study.
She was with a friend, talking. She seemed to be in a good mood. Momiji watched as she gestured with her hands, laughed with her head thrown back, smiled with her eyes.
She would have been perfect with Hatori.
"Take it away! It's not mine!"
"Are you really okay with forgetting? You won't regret it?"
"The greatest regret I have in my life, is that that creature came out of my body."
"You would have been cool," he whispered softly, and for some reason he remained riveted to where he was standing, observing her. Watching her. For nearly the first time, he was really looking at the woman Hatori had fallen in love with.
The only woman who every truly accepted a Jyuunishi.
All right, technically, it wasn't true. Many women had married Jyuunishi members, in the centuries since the curse was first placed. Many possibly still would. And there was Kagura's mom, who accepted her. And Hiro's mom.
And, of course, Tohru.
But these people, those who didn't let the curse override their love, they were rare. Few, far between. People—male, and female, often rejected them. More often, they were repulsed.
"It's not mine!"
More often, they were like his mother.
"That creature…"
You would have been nice. Momiji drew back a little from the wall, sighing with a sad little smile and closing his eyes. Maybe, what was most curious about this particular woman, was that she hadn't wanted her memories erased.
Unlike Mama.
She had accepted Hatori's Jyuunishi form; no psychotic side effects, no sudden deterioration of health.
Until Akito had interfered.
But still, she hadn't called Hatori a creature. An it. Or a monster.
Then again, she hadn't been his mother. But it wasn't so different, was it? You hug somebody you love. Someone who's your life. And in your arms, he turns into…an animal. Something not human.
It wasn't much different, right? The difference was rejection. Or acceptance. The difference was choice. And love.
She hadn't had much choice, in the erasing of her memories. Not like Mama. But she had still loved, and believed it unreciprocated. And so she left.
She would have made him happy. Yes, she would have. So much. Momiji often hated the shadows flitting across his sort-of-guardian's face, the seriousness he saw too often there. He had seen a picture, once, of Hatori and Kana, laughing. He had been stunned at the difference.
Sometimes, he wondered if the pain got sharper as you grew older. Sometimes he wondered if when he was so tired, so tired of his mother not knowing him, so tired of the constant remembrance of the fact that she'd hated him, he'd look like that, too. Never smiling, never laughing.
But Hatori was smiling more. Looking better. Everyone was. Everyone had been. Since, Momiji reflected. Since Tohru had arrived.
Kana had been like Tohru.
You would have been proof, he thought quietly. Proof that Jyuunishi are lovable, proof that Jyuunishi are human. Proof that turning into an animal does not matter, proof that there was such a thing as unselfish love, that overcame your fears and your weaknesses. Proof, for Akito, for his papa, for his mama.
Tohru was the proof now, and he couldn't have asked for a better one. But still, had Kana remained…
A stray, wild thought struck him, and he peered around the wall with widened eyes. You would have been…like a mother.
An odd thought, but a true one. Kana would have married Hatori. She would have lived with him, stayed with him. She would have been there when Momiji was put to Hatori's charge. And maybe, just maybe, since she had loved and accepted Hatori, she would have loved and accepted…
"Momiji." The voice was quiet, the tone a balance between deadpan and…maybe amused.
He spun around, stifling a gasp. Hatori was gazing down at him, eyebrows raised…and for the slightest fraction of a second, Momiji saw his glance slip away and behind to Kana, before focusing back on him.
"Ha'ari…"
"You were taking too long," the man interrupted, and there was the hint of a smile around his mouth. "Come on, let's go home."
He nodded and smiled brightly, but there was an understanding sadness in it, too.
And before they left, he sneaked a last glance at the woman, seated on the bench, and happily oblivious.
You…would have been.
…--EnD--…