That hurts,
Your baby told you it was over,
"Matt? I need to talk to someone!" Mimi whispered as soon as Matt opened the door, tears streaming down her face.
"Mimi! What's wrong?" Matt asked, concerned, as he stepped aside to allow Mimi to enter his apartment.
"Tai…broke up with me!" Mimi looked away as Matt led her over to his couch, sitting down beside her once she sat down.
And I'm just a friendly shoulder you can cry on,
And I ache to take you into my arms
Matt looked at Mimi as she told about the break up; about the angry words that Tai had spoken. Mimi…he thought. If only… and he ached to put his arms around her; to hold him close to him.
Of all the dreams in all the world
There's nothing worse,
Then meant to be, and you don't see,
Matt looked away for a couple of seconds, then looked back at Mimi. She was staring down at her hands, tears still running down her face. I always thought that we were meant to be, Mimi. He thought. But you only think of me as a friend. You always loved him…Tai.
That I wanted to be the one to make your knees weak,
Your hands shake.
I wanted to be the one that you woke up to,
Held on to.
But I never knew that touch,
And you'll never know how much,
That hurts.
Oh, Mimi! If only you knew how much I love you, I'm sure that you would realize that we were meant to be, not you and Tai! While Tai was Matt's best friend, Matt had always been jealous. Jealous that Tai had Mimi; the girl that he, Matt loved. And he had remained a friend to Mimi; nothing more, while every time he had seen her with Tai, his heart had been shattered into millions of pieces.
It's not fair,
I have to be the great pretender,
As if I don't remember
All those sad prayers,
That sounded good but got me nowhere,
I prayed to God so many times that you would be mine, but it never happened. You remained Tai's, Matt's thoughts went on. It's not fair! Why should he have gotten you, when all he did was break your heart? And, even though Tai was one of his best friends, he would never be able to forgive him for this. And all this time, I have to pretend. Pretend that I don't love you! He looked once again at Mimi; at her hair, at her eyes, at her face.
Of all the jokes in all the world,
How sad is this,
To be so close and not let show,
If only I could hold you. Tell you that everything is going to be all right. Then, at least I would feel better.
Mimi stopped talking, and just stared down at her hands, looking up every now and then, then looking back down at her hands, twisting and writhing in her lap. Matt just sat there, not saying a word, listening to the silence as his thoughts devoured his mind.
That I wanted to be the one to make your knees weak,
Your hands shake.
I wanted to be the one that you woke up to,
Held on to.
But I never knew that touch,
And you'll never know how much,
That hurts.
Say something, Matt! Matt berated himself for his silence. But he couldn't bring himself to tell Mimi how he felt. She still hurts from what Tai did to her. She still loves him, he said to himself. No, I can't say anything. She expects me to be the friend that I've always been, to comfort her, not to tell her how I feel and just upset her more.
"I'm sorry, Mimi," he said softly. "I'm sure things will work out. I'm sure that you two will get back together." It nearly killed him to say this; he didn't want Mimi and Tai to get back together. He wanted Mimi for himself. But that would just be pure selfishness. What he had said was probably what Mimi had been expecting. It hurts so much to see you hurting, Mimi, and for me not to be able to do anything but try my best to comfort you, when I can see that it's not working.
Oh, I wanted to be the one to make your knees weak,
Your hands shake.
I wanted to be the one that you woke up to,
Held on to.
But I never knew that touch,
And you'll never know how much,
That hurts.
Mimi stood up. "I'd better leave," she said quietly, wiping the last traces of tears off of her cheeks. She turned to Matt. "I hope your right. I hope everything will work out. Thanks for listening." And then, she left.
I hope everything works out, too, Mimi. Matt thought as he watched her leave. Just not in the same way as you do. But…if you can't and don't love me…There's nothing I can do…but hope. You may never love me back, but I'll always love you. He watched as her car faded into the distance, and turned a corner, disappearing out of site, and the words that she had last spoken played through his mind
"Thanks for listening," she had said. If only you knew…if only you knew that I wanted to do more than listen. That I wanted to hold you. The kiss away your tears. To tell you that as long as you were with me, that nothing like that would ever happen again, because I won't hurt you. I wanted to be the one for you, Mimi. But it looks like I never will be. And you'll never know how much that hurts.
The End.
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