The story upon thy skin
Once again I found myself at Emily's, who was rapidly embracing her role as my babysitter while my vampire family and her wolf brothers tracked a lethal flame haired vampire, by name of Victoria. I was perched on a stool in the kitchen watching as she mixed ingredients in a bowl, which would become intricate delicacies for Jake and the others. She began pouring the mixture into paper cases before putting them in the oven. I remained perched anxiously on the edge of my stool, fidgeting and stroking the scar on my hand in order to keep myself distracted. A soft sigh broke through the silent, tension filled kitchen, and it took me a moment to realise the noise had come from Emily.
She turned to me, brushing her hair back behind one ear, causing her jagged scars to become more prominent in the light. "They'll be alright Bella." Emily said quietly. I snapped my head up and met her eyes. "How do you know? How can you be so sure?" I asked desperately wishing I could feel the same confidence that suddenly seemed to be saturating the kitchen and originating from the wolf woman. "I have to believe it Bella. Think about it, with the amount of time Sam and the pack spend running all over the forest in search of danger I'm often left on my own. If I sat there worrying and panicking each time, well I'm sure I'd of had a nervous breakdown by now. And then where would those wolves be?" Her voice took on a light laugh at the end of her explanation. In that moment the respect I had for Emily grew. I would never be able to fall into the role of a confident persona whenever Edward, the Cullens, Jake and the pack left me behind. My acting skills weren't that good. "They don't realise what their actions do to the people left behind," I murmured and slowly began tracing my scar again to distract myself from the sea of nausea bubbling in my stomach. "No, they don't." Emily agreed bobbing her head in a sure confirmation. "But it would make it worse if they knew, it would distract them from their duty, and then someone could get seriously hurt, werewolf or vampire." She added as an afterthought.
"I suppose your right." I stated letting Emily's logic slowly start to sink into my mind. "Doesn't make it any easier though." I whispered.
Her eyes grew soft. "No, it doesn't."
Silence began its reign over the kitchen once again, leaving Emily and me to revel in our thoughts. This was all my fault. Victoria being here, taking lives, causing two opposing clans to move in close proximity to each other was all my fault. Emily wouldn't be alone so much if it wasn't for me. Edward and the rest of my adoptive family wouldn't be risking their eternal existence if it wasn't for me. "I'm sorry!" I blurted out without thinking, my mind not catching up with my mouth. Emily's eyes widened.
"What are you sorry for?" she asked confusion dripping from every word.
"Victoria being here is all my fault. You being left on your own here so much is all my fault." I explained guilt consuming me.
"Bella, I don't believe that. You haven't done anything! If it's anyone's fault, it's this Victoria's, and before you say anything, her being here is not your fault. Even if you weren't here in Forks, she and the Cullen's would have run into each other at some point. It's not your fault Bella. Trust me." Emily stated with so much conviction, it was becoming increasingly difficult not to believe she spoke the truth. Slowly I nodded my head as I absorbed Emily's words. She smiled in response.
"Bella, do you mind if I ask you something?" Emily asked her tone suddenly cautious.
"Go ahead." I replied puzzled. She combed her fingers through her hair for a second before releasing her words rapidly, "It's just that I've been watching you each time you've come here and today I just, I had to ask and please don't be offended, but your scar on your hand, I've seen you trace it to keep your hands busy and I just well, I wondered does it hurt? Do you see Edward looking at it, with a certain look in his eyes that only happens when he sees it?"
Her words were spoken so quickly that I had to retrace them in my head before I understood what she was saying. I guess I never realised how much I messed with my scar until now. "I'm not offended Emily. Please don't worry about it; my intentions weren't very clear were they? I trace my scar as a nervous habit I guess, not because it hurts, really I'm fine." I smiled softly. Emily's posture relaxed slightly as she seemed a little appeased. "As for Edward, sometimes when he thinks I'm not looking, I see him stare at my scar and I can see he's berating himself for not protecting me, for not getting there in time. The sadness and guilt swirling through his eyes is heartbreaking." I finished softly, tears starting to decorate the rim of my eyes as I recalled all the times since James bit me that Edward had gazed at my scar and the emotions that flitted through his face each time, causing me to cast my eyes away from his face. Emily nodded her head sadly, as though something had just confirmed itself to her. With a sudden epiphany, I realised what. "Sam looks at you like that sometimes too, doesn't he?" I asked gently.
"Yes, he tries to hide it, suppress the emotions he feels when he sees these lines on my left side. But they can never hide it deep enough from us can they?" She answered as a tear made its way along her cheek. With that one tear, my own began to slip over my lashes. "No," I agreed "We'll always see, even when we don't wish to." So suddenly that it caught me off guard, Emily hugged me tight. "I knew you would understand Bella," she whispered, as I hugged back.
"We'll wear them as a mark, to show what we run with, to show what we choose." I whispered back, my breath shaky. Emily gave me one last squeeze, released me and smiled through her tear stained cheeks, and I couldn't help but smile back through my own as well. "Your right," Emily said "That's what we'll do."
The oven made a clicking noise, indicating that the cakes Emily was preparing were done. She opened the door, pulled the tray out and handed me one as well as removing one for herself. We waited until they had cooled before filling our mouths with the treat and allowing the flavour to dance over our taste buds. We remained like that, in Emily's kitchen laughing and talking until the pack came home, happy that we had both found someone to confide in who understood more then anyone else.
Ok the idea for this came this morning after I'd seen New Moon last night. I was thinking that Emily and Bella have alot in common, even if they're not aware of it, so I wanted to do a little piece that showed them bonding over being the only two women with scars as a consequence of what they choose. And they wouldn't have it any other way. :)