A young girl stands in her bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 31st of December, is this young girl's birthday. Though it was thirteen years ago she was given life, it is only today she will be given a name!

What will the name of this young girl be?

Enter name.

GODAWFUL FARTGOBBLER

Try again...

Mara Parsaw

Your name is Mara, as said earlier, it is your birthday. Numerous STUFFED ANIMALS are strewn about your room. You have VERY FEW interests. You are particularly fond of POORLY WRITTEN FANFICTION. You also enjoy singing but you are NOT VERY GOOD AT IT. You also have a knack for sewing, but you aren't very good at this either. though it isn't even a task that requires much skill... Anyways. What is your next course of action?

Mara: FIND LIMBS! QUICKLY! Check the closet!

Your limbs are in your "sewing drawer" you twit. And they aren't even limbs at that there sort of just... a hodgepoge of stuffed animal limbs sewn together by your expertise. You still go and retrieve these limbs. Due to Mara's apparent lack of arms, you lift the LARGE STUFFED ANIMAL from infront of the drawer. You are puzzled as whatever this entity is, cannot see you have arms.

Make a hideous chimera using limbs.

Why would you ever engage in such a frivilous task? But... the sewing needles beckon... NO! You kick the string to the side. You have no time for these shenanigains! Today is the day you and your friends play The Sburb Beta.You have been eagerly awaiting The Sburb Beta. It should be here. Has to be. You are FAIRLY CERTAIN no wacky shenanigains will occur when trying to retrieve the disks. But, on to more pressing matters!

Captchalogue arms.

You captchalogue these arms in your TREE modus. It becomes the root of your tree.

Cut through this bullshit and get beta.

Right, right, Beta... beta... You open the door leading from your room. Downstairs you see your GRANDMOTHER she is busy watching her ' ' again. You honestly can't see her appeal in the show. It is best to avoid her at all costs... You, ever so sneakily slither down the stairs. The old crone is none the wiser! You inch your hand towards the door... YES! It is open, you scramble to the mail-box. It just so happens that the 'red-flag-thing' which is a security measure is up! Your mail has arrived. Within the mailbox is, your copies of the Sburb beta! (Aw yis) A package in green wrapping, and yet another package, wrapped in blue. You captchalogue these materials, adding new leaves to your tree. You make the short trail back to your house, and sprint up the stairs, so as to avoid any misshaps.

You're computer is flashing. One of your chums may be pestering you! You eagerly answer the chum.

- cynicalTheorist [CT] began pestering cuddlyAnarchist [CA] -

CT: Hey, Mara.

CA: hiiiiii gale! I got your present! And I got evies too!

CT: Good, good, so what other SICK LOOT did you score on your ~special day~?

CA: oh um, im not really sure! ive kind of been avoiding my grandmother for the time being...

CA: i also got the beta too! so...

CT: Perfect.

CA: Are you going to be my "server"?

CT: Uh, no, I won't be. I'm next to last in the chain I think.

CA: no! not this foresight bullshit! im not having it today! use some context or dont speak to me!

CT: Fine. But anyways, I'm going to go now, Kay? You have some buisness to handle with your Grandmother, and Josh.

CT: Bye!

CA: byeee!

- cynicalTheorist [CT] ceased pestering cuddlyAnarchist [CA] -

Ugh. You absolutley DESPISE his cryptic BULLSHIT! It drives you up the wall... You feel a grumble in your stomach. You are in dire need of some BIRTHDAY SNACKAGE. Oh, but 'Gran' is still downstairs... You guess this is the buisness Jack foretold of with Gran.