A Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan fiction (aka) I do not own anything in the whedon-verse and anything I write in his sandbox, I write for pleasure not profit.

Starring: Willow Rosenberg & Vampire Willow

"Wanna be bad?"

I've never thought about what would happen if I had ever been turned; either by that loser Marcus, Darla, Jessie, Angelus, Drusilla or even Spike. Okay that's a lie and as much as I'd like to think that I'd never daydreamed or imagined what it would be like… I have. Call me a liar but the thought of being a vampire should freak me out, heck it should terrify me! I've seen what they can do, the beasts they can become, the lives they take without mercy. I've seen it all, but the morbidity of their existence and the consequences they pass onto humankind actually excite me and see to it that I stick close to Buffy. Some might think if I had such an open mindset to them I'd jump at the chance to become one, but the action of staying friends with a Slayer has a way of dampening that wish. I've seen the amazing feats she can pull off even when her enemy was once her lover; though she took forever getting around to even trying to dust him.

With all of the information I have pulled, searched and absorbed I can't help but think over the actions of even the biggest and baddest vampires we've come across. I would never share this to anyone, but I actually keep a database of what they've done while creating a separate one to analyze and pick apart where they went wrong and how I might have improved or even completed their mission with minimal casualties and risks to my side; turns out I'm an evil mastermind hidden under all this fuzzy. I've also seen a reoccurring theme in each of their quests that equally apply to the reoccurring theme of their defeat. Most want to end the world or plunge it into a Demonically Ruled Hell, but in retrospect that's an incredibly stupid and naïve goal to shot for.

From the pages or many many tome's I've scoured and tracked down via the net or Giles private library, should the vampires actually succeed in bringing the known world into Hell they would never live past the first day. Such stupidity on their parts to think that true blooded demons would consort and congratulate their kind for doing something so… well stupid. They are lesser demons and as such are farther down the food chain to the true demons then we are; incredibly enough. Then taking into that fact they feed of human blood which I'd sure most of the pure demons do and all they have done is make their chances of finding food scarce. All in all a stupid idea.

All of this ran through my brain at the speed of light, each neuron snapping to increase my brains thinking potential as the vampire mirror of me tightened her grip on my waist. I was no sooner done with all that when a separate part of my brain tunneled all that had happened to be in the last three years. Xander's continual rejection, Buffy's growing ego, meeting and wanting to feel something for Oz, Giles and the pressure to look up and try to be like him and the constant battle between wanting to be more and wanting to be there for my friends. Xander, Xander, Buffy, Giles, Xander, Oz, Cordelia, Jenny, Angel, Buffy, Angelus, Buffy, Xander, Oz, Percy, Snyder, Xander, Buffy… it was all too much! They took me for granted, all of them gained something out of using me and what did I get in return? Not so much as a thank you!

My emotional turmoil must have broken through to show on my face because I soon felt my alternative version begin to purr in delight. It broke me; my life had been one pitfall after another with only myself to keep me from free falling off the edge and snapping. I couldn't believe how much I wanted to break through every expectation and label my friends, family and peers had placed on me. I wanted a way out and soon my lips betrayed my secret. "Yes."