She could hear the others talking in low tones. It did not take much to guess that they were talking of her. She could not blame them, really. After all, she had emerged from a darkspawn tunnel, scrounged weapons and pieces of armour in hand, covered in dirt, filth, and blood. It was a far cry from when they had first met her, wearing Aeducan armour and the honour of her family. Sere swallowed hard and calmed herself. There was little point in wallowing in self-pity. Her brother had out-played her, plain and simple.
"You haven't eaten your stew," Duncan commented as he sat next to her. Sere glanced down at her plate and shrugged, "Your rabbit is similar to nug, but," her voice trailed off.
"But things are too different up here for you to have much of an appetite," Duncan nodded. "It will take time, Sereda, but you will grow comfortable up here."
She managed a small smile, "I don't have much of a choice, Master Duncan. I am a surfacer now."
"No, you are a Grey Warden now."
Sere looked up at him in surprise at the sharpness of his tone. Duncan continued, "You said you were exiled. I know a bit about what that means for a dwarf," he paused and her look of surprise, "You are not the first to lose caste and join with us. Should you wish to tell me, you are welcome to but I will not press."
"You probably do deserve to know the whole truth," Sere sighed and shook her head, "It is not an easy tale for me to tell, though."
Duncan waited patiently, studying the once proud dwarf. He had been intrigued by her when he had first met her in the throne room of Orzamarr. There had been a fire in her eyes that he no longer saw, a regal bearing that had fallen from her shoulders. Duncan frowned to himself. She would have to regain her spirit before Ostagar or he would probably lose her to the Taint.
Sere fiddled with the hem of her borrowed tunic. Well, it could not be considered borrowed any more. She had hacked off a good twelve inches to make it wearable and she doubted that the Grey Warden who had given it to her would want it back. She licked her lips and angled herself to face Duncan. If she was going to reveal her shame, she would do it like an Aeducan, looking him square in the face.
"You know that my command set out soon after your group, yes," at his nod, she continued, "My father had sent Gorim and me on a secret quest. He wanted us to find the Shield of the Paragon Aeducan. It would have given my family more honour in the Assembly," she paused and offered a wry smile, "And looking back, I think he wanted me to find it so I would have the honour as well. I do not think he was thrilled with the idea of Trian becoming king. If I found the shield, I would have been able to move against him."
"If you found the shield, you would have been able to do more than move against him," Duncan chuckled, "I heard the rumours. You would have been crowned without much trouble."
"Indeed," Sere stopped. The idea of ruling had always been at the forefront of her mind. She had wanted to be queen, there was little doubt. Her duty had always been to family and to kingdom. And now, her duty was to something she had no history with and little true loyalty for.
"Bhelen played me for a fool. He riled me with talk of Trian's machinations. He garnered support among the deshyrs without anyone knowing. He bribed the scouts who went with me," Sere shook her head, "I found Trian, dead at the meeting point. Before I could do more than kneel beside him, Bhelen arrived, with Father and Lord Harrowmont in tow."
"And you appeared to be a kinslayer," Duncan gently prodded her to continue as she fell silent. Sere nodded, unable to speak for a moment. She could not forget the look on her father's face as he had fallen to his knees beside Trian. The agony and the betrayal in his eyes still haunted her.
She cleared her throat, "The scouts with me accused me of killing Trian without warning and Bhelen incited the Assembly to convict me without trial. Only Harrowmont's efforts allowed me the option of going to the Deep Roads."
Sere inhaled slowly, keeping the tears that threatened at bay. Her farewell with Gorim, Harrowmont's belief in her innocence, her father's sending of the sword… It was too much and she felt overwhelmed by the emotions. And now, here she was, on the surface, in the company of humans, and preparing for what sounded to be a suicide mission against the largest army of Darkspawn she had ever heard of.
"You never have to speak of this again, Sereda," Duncan's whisper penetrated her thoughts, "We do not care about our recruits' pasts, only their futures."
He placed his hand on her shoulder and squeezed, "Get some rest. We have far to go tomorrow and I know it is not easy on you keeping up with us."
"Master Duncan," she stopped as the man paused, "I never thanked you for giving me an option."
"I think you know how to thank me, Sereda," Duncan nodded once and turned away.