Uh, well this is one of my first fanfics ever, so don´t hit me! (*smile*). It´s from Kamui´s POV and tries to describe his feelings towards a certain onmyouji.
I don´t own any neither the CLAMP characters mentioned in this fic, nor the lyrics to the song "Another Day" from "Nightwish". Almost wished, they´d do.
C&C welcomed
Another Day
by Tschubi-chan
The first time we met was in the very dephts of my heart.
I hid myself in the deepest, darkest shadows of my soul only walls of burning fear surrounding me;
Walls protecting me from being hurt again.
Then I saw you in front of me,
a fallen angel with eyes of the deep green sea and a pain so similar to mine.
You wanted me to return to reality, although you didn´t know me...
although you saw me for the first time that day.
You wanted me to return to reality.
That is why you showed me your grieve in order to ease my own.
You showed me the death of your very loved one by another loved one, as it was the same to me.
I could see the hurt clearly written on your angelic face as you remembered that fateful day,
so I decided never to speak of my own nemesis in front of you again, afraid of making our pain the same.
That day, I know, I fell in love with your ways,
that gentle person hidden by a beautiful face of bitterness and pain,
that tiny little smile full of relief when you saw I woke up again.
How couldn´t I fall in love with you?
I know you´re going away
I take my love into another day
In my thoughts you´re with me
I fell in love with your ways
I know you´re going away
Lead my heart into a daze
I know you´re going away
Leaves a void in my heart and soul
But still, I know that there are worlds seperating us,
No...not worlds, but demons with the evil faces of our loved ones.
I know you can´t forget his gentle way as it is the same with me.
You try to forget the time when his gentle smile turned evil, try to see what lies beneath,
but I know you´re failing day by day as it is the same with me.
Soon you´ll encounter him for the last time. I know that this will be the day you´re going away.
You´re going away and leave me to face my fear alone.
Oh, why does it hurt so much to think of you?
There was a time only the thought of him could make my heart ache so much.
But not now,...
because I know the day I saw you for the first time,
I fell in love with your ways.
Wherever you are
Whatever you do
I feel the walls surrounding you.
Every time I see you, I try to make you smile, because I do not want you to see only him,
because I want you to see another one, but I know this will only stay a dream.
How can I face you if I´m not able myself to smile
if I´m not able myself to forget the past.
Oh, I know I never mention his name in front of you or the others,
but when looking into your serene face, I know that you know, I´m not able to let go.
I´m not able to let go because of that wish of mine, that wish to bring him back.
But, is my wish still the same or did it change during the time I was with you?
I don´t know and
that´s why I will fail you as I failed before
that´s why you will leave when the time has come.
Wherever you are
What ever you do
I know you are independant
But I´m trying to get through to you
That´s why I desperatly try to get through to you trying to understand my own heart by doing so.
I know to change your heart I have to show you mine again,
but ...
Do you really want me to open up for you?
Will you hate me because I do not want to let you go.
After all it´s also a matter of your own heart and I´m not allowed to interfere with this.
Wherever you are
What ever you do
Don´t you know it depends on you
I´m trying to tell you, but I´m still afraid to hurt you more than ease your pain,
so I again wait for another day.
I know you´re going away
I take my love into another day
In my thoughts you´re with me
I fell in love with you ways.