Quinn had gone through a wide range of emotions throughout the week. First, she was in disbelief that Rachel and Finn were moving the wedding to right after Regionals. She'd really thought her chat with Rachel in the bathroom might've set her straight. Rachel didn't realize what an incredible life she had ahead of her, and Finn was just going to drag her down. I would never do that to her, Quinn repeatedly thought. Never.
Quinn had been touched when Rachel came to her after Finn proposed. She could practically heard a hallelujah chorus singing when Rachel asked her what to do. She almost told Rachel right then and there. She'd thought they were getting closer and closer, especially after Sectionals. That's when Quinn's feelings grew even more. Imagine how crushed she was when she found out Rachel had said yes. As soon as she got home, she went straight to her room and cried harder than she had for Finn, Puck, or Sam.
Quinn had hoped Rachel would come to her senses, but her fear deepened when she went to the dress fitting. It practically killed her to hear Rachel call herself "Mrs. Finn Hudson". She finally tried to talk some sense into her, albeit a little desperately. Instead, things just got worse. Rachel told her not to come to the wedding. Quinn decided it would be best if she didn't. She didn't think she'd be able to handle watching the happy couple kiss.
Then things changed at Regionals. From the side of the stage, Quinn could see Rachel looking up at Finn in the balcony as she sang. She watched her hug Finn when they won. She realized Rachel was happy. She loved Rachel's smile. It always made her smile. She changed her mind about the wedding and decided to come. She could bear the kiss if it meant she could see that smile again. The thought that Rachel's smile wouldn't be directed at her did bring her down a little, but as long as Rachel was happy, that was all that mattered.
As she drove to the chapel, she came to a sudden realization. She figured out why Rachel was marrying Finn. Rachel was holding onto him because she thought he was the first person to love her, and she didn't think she would be able to find that anywhere else.
But she was wrong. Very wrong. And Quinn was done keeping quiet.
Quinn stepped on the gas and raced to the chapel. She was already running a little late, but God she was hoping she'd get there before it was too late.
The funny thing was that as Quinn pulled into the parking lot, she wasn't scared, at least not about Rachel possibly turning her down or what people would say about her admitting feelings for a girl. She was more worried they'd already be married before she got there. She raced inside, ignoring the calls from the girl at the front desk asking where she was going.
She found the two oak doors and stopped herself. She took a few deep breaths so she didn't look too much like a maniac storming into Rachel's wedding. All of a sudden, as if on cue, she heard someone faintly say from inside the chapel, "If anyone knows a reason why these two should not be bound in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace."
Quinn felt her heart stop at those words, but on instinct, pushed the oak doors open.
"Wait!"
As soon as she stepped inside, every face was upon her. Finn in particular wasn't looking too happy, but Quinn only had eyes for Rachel.
It took Rachel a few seconds to find her words. "Q-Quinn, what are you do-"
"I'm sorry, Rachel," Quinn said, walking up the aisle. "I thought I could let you do this because it made you happy, but I can't. I can't do this anymore. I can't let you marry Finn." She stopped just below the altar. "He's making you sacrifice your future just because he doesn't have one of his own. And the only reason you're holding onto him is because you don't think you'll find love anywhere else. Because you're not seeing what's right in front of you."
Quinn took a deep breath. "I won't let you marry Finn because I love you."
It was like Quinn had stepped into a movie because as soon as her words hit the air, everyone gasped. Sugar and Brittany were staring open-mouthed at Quinn. Santana, Kurt, Blaine, and Mercedes were looking expectedly at Rachel, waiting for a bigger reaction. Finn looked absolutely furious. Rachel just speechlessly looked at Quinn, as if she were waiting for her to say she was kidding.
The silence inside the chapel was deafening, so Quinn decided to keep talking. "I would never make you sacrifice your future for me," she said firmly. "I know your future is the most important thing to you. I want to watch you proudly when you audition for NYADA, and be there for you when you get your acceptance letter. I want to watch your Broadway debut from the front row of the audience. I want to watch you win your first Tony. I want to watch you succeed because I believe in you. I want to be with you, Rachel."
Rachel still didn't say anything. She was standing in a chapel in a wedding dress about to marry someone while someone else had just confessed their love to her. She felt like she was in a soap opera. She became aware that Finn was staring at her, too. In the same way Quinn was, waiting for an answer.
"I - uh," she stammered. "I - I need a minute," she managed to get out. She stepped down from the altar, grabbed Kurt by the arm and walked out of the chapel.
Quinn watched her leave. It's not like she didn't expect this to happen. Kurt was her confidante, she trusted him, and this was a big moment for her.
"I can't believe this is happening."
Quinn turned to Finn. "Why are you doing this to me?" he asked.
"I'm not doing this to you," Quinn answered. "I'm doing this for her."
"Oh please, you're doing this for yourself. And how can you say all that stuff about how I'm making Rachel sacrifice her future? How is this sacrificing her future?"
"Because she has such a bright life ahead of her, but ever since you two got back together she's disappeared into you. The thing I love most about her is her ambition, and every day I see it slowly die. You've just sucked it out of her."
Meanwhile, Rachel was pacing the hallway outside the chapel while Kurt watched her, leaning against the wall.
"I can't believe this is actually happening," Rachel said. "What am I supposed to do?"
"Okay, well first you need to calm down," Kurt said. He went over to Rachel and took her by her shoulders."
"How can I calm down?" she asked. "I mean, here I am about to marry a guy I've pined for for so long and then in comes someone I care about so much who comes out saying all these wonderful things and-"
"You care about Quinn?" Kurt interrupted.
"You know I do," Rachel answered. "You know that all I've wanted was to be her friend."
"No, I know that," Kurt said. "But I mean, like, do you care about her that way?"
Rachel sighed. She'd always thought Quinn was pretty. Very pretty. And she wanted to be around that. She wanted to be her friend. Probably as much as she wanted to be with Finn.
"Rachel?" Kurt asked, looking at her intently.
"Oh God, I don't know, Kurt!" she said finally. "And they both deserve an answer!"
"Okay, take it easy," Kurt said calmly. "Did Quinn say you had to make a decision right now? No. You need time. Finn gave you time after he proposed."
Rachel nodded. "Right." She looked down into the bouquet of flowers she was still holding. "But this is so huge."
"I know," Kurt said, putting an arm around her. "But you'll figure it out. I know you will. And you'll be happy with your decision."
Rachel nodded again as Kurt gave her a one-armed squeeze. He steered her back inside the chapel. He pushed open one of the doors with his free hand. There was absolute silence inside, but as Rachel walked back to the altar, she could tell Finn and Quinn had been arguing. They'd just abruptly stopped when she came back inside.
Rachel took a deep breath. "I, um, I really can't make this decision right now," she said, looking back and forth from Finn to Quinn. Quinn nodded understandingly. "I need time to think about this, maybe a few days."
That, to Finn, felt like a punch in the stomach. "Are you serious?"
"I took time to think after you proposed to me," Rachel said to Finn. "Quinn deserves the same consideration."
Finn didn't reply.
"Also, um," Rachel added, as she came up with an idea that might help make her decision, "I think it's best that I don't talk to either of you for a few days. I want to really think about this with no distractions, because you both deserve well-thought out answers.
Quinn nodded again. "Of course."
Rachel nodded in return.
"So, what does that mean for us?" Finn asked. "This? The wedding?"
"The wedding is on hold. For now," Rachel answered simply.
With Kurt's arm still around her shoulders, she left the chapel again. Blaine, Tina, and Mercedes got up to follow them.
Finn was staring at the chapel doors, looking thunderstruck. "I can't believe you!" he said to Quinn. "Why couldn't you just leave her alone? She was happy!"
Quinn folded her arms and looked up at Finn. "She would have been happy today, and that would have lasted a year at most before she realized how big a mistake this was."
"I've been looking forward to this for months, I don't want to have to postpone this wedding-"
"Is that all you care about?" Quinn asked furiously. "What you want? What about what she wants, what she thinks? She's a person, Finn, not a prize."
That was her Finn limit. She walked back up the aisle and out the chapel doors, unaware that Brittany, Santana, and Sugar had followed her out.
"Quinn, wait-"
"Santana, I don't wanna hear whatever name you're gonna call me," Quinn replied, not even looking at her.
"No," Santana said, taking her arm. Quinn turned around and looked at her. "I was gonna say you were kickass back there. You have a little Snix in you," Santana said approvingly.
Quinn smiled a little, but her smile vanished in a second. "I just hope Rachel makes the right choice."
Santana nodded. She hoped so too, for Quinn's sake.
"Why didn't you tell us about it before?" Brittany asked. "We're the Unholy Trinity, Quinn."
"Because I didn't think it mattered. This was the way things were supposed to be."
"But then you couldn't take it anymore," Santana said.
Quinn nodded.
"How are you gonna handle the next few days while Rachel's thinking about this?"
"I have no idea. I need a big distraction."
"I got it," Sugar piped up. "Come over to my house, and we'll have a pajama party. We'll watch a bazillion movies and just do girly things."
Brittany looked pleadingly at Quinn, who sighed. "All right. Thanks."
The next few days were complete agony for the three of them. Finn and Quinn were constantly checking their phones to see if maybe Rachel had texted them. Every time they passed her in the hallway, they made eye contact with her, hoping she'd have made her decision. Sugar's pajama party helped Quinn get her mind off Rachel, but only for that night. Afterwards, Sugar and Brittany tried to get her reminiscing about that night to keep her mind off Rachel, but with no avail.
Rachel kept worrying how her eventual decision would affect both of them. It was driving her crazy. She texted Kurt and Mercedes at every available moment. She figured Mercedes in particular could help her, since she'd gone through something similar with Sam and Shane.
On Wednesday, Kurt and Mercedes sat on the stage floor in the auditorium while Rachel silently paced in a circle.
"Rachel, I think you need to talk it out," Mercedes said.
"It might help us understand better," Kurt said in agreement.
Rachel tipped her head back. "Maybe."
"Well, we already know how you feel about Finn," Mercedes said, shifting on the floor. "What about Quinn? I know you guys have become closer friends."
"Yeah, we have. And I've wanted that for a long time. I wanted to be liked by the pretty, popular girl. I wanted to be her friend." She fiddled with the ends of her hair. "And not only are we friends now, but she believes in me. She knows I'm gonna succeed."
"So does Finn," Kurt said.
Rachel hesitated. "I, well... I remember like a few days after he proposed, he said to me, 'even if you don't get into NYADA'. But when Quinn told me she got into Yale, she said she knew I was going to get into NYADA."
"And what was all that stuff about Finn not having a future?" Mercedes said. "I mean, you guys have talked about it, right?"
"Well, he tried to get that football scholarship to OSU, but Shane got it instead. And since then, he's..." Rachel trailed off, thinking back. She stopped pacing. "Since then, he's just proposed to me. He hasn't told me what schools he applied to in New York, or what he's gonna do when we get there."
"Nothing?" Kurt asked. "I gave him a stack of college pamphlets after I talked to him about the engagement."
"When did you talk to him about it?" Rachel asked.
"After you told us," he replied, indicating himself and Mercedes. "Finn's my brother and he didn't tell me, so I had to talk to him about it myself. I tried to get him motivated, and I thought it worked, but I guess it didn't."
"Let's go back to Quinn," Mercedes said. "When did you two start to become better friends?"
"Um..." Rachel said, thinking. "Prom. After Kurt got elected queen, Quinn ran to the bathroom really upset and we had kind of a heart-to-heart there."
"What happened?" Kurt asked.
"I just comforted her." She started pacing again. "She said she was scared of the future, after she graduated high school. Like she just thought of herself as the pretty blonde cheerleading prom queen and nothing else. I just told her she had nothing to be afraid of, because she was so much more than that and she didn't even realize it yet."
Kurt stared at her. "Rachel, listen to yourself."
"What?"
"I just," Kurt began, shaking his head a little. "I've never heard you talk about anyone like that."
"Me neither," Mercedes said.
Rachel slowly stopped pacing. She replayed what she'd just said about Quinn. It sounded just fine to her, but she could see how it could raise a few eyebrows if she said it to someone else.
"I've been wondering, though," Mercedes said, "why did you say you didn't want to talk to them while you were thinking?"
"I just didn't want to be distracted," Rachel said. "I didn't want either of them to try and sway this decision in their favor. Why?"
"Because that's what Miss Pillsbury told me and Sam to do for a week; not talk to each other so we could try and figure this out on our own. It was also to see if we really missed each other and whether or not we were dying for the week to end."
"Well, it's been a few days since you've talked to either of them," Kurt said. "Who do you miss more?"
Rachel was a little taken aback by the question, but took a few seconds to ponder it. As she thought, a series of images swam in her mind, all of the same person. She saw memories, still photos of smiles, imaginary scenarios of what they could do once this whole mess was resolved. Rachel seemed to fill up with a sense of warm comfort. It gave her goosebumps on her forearms.
She'd made her decision.
Finn had practically run to the auditorium as soon as he got Rachel's text. He found her sitting onstage, her feet swinging back and forth underneath the stool. She looked up when she saw the door open.
"Hey," Finn said.
"Hi."
Finn made his way down the stairs and up onstage. Rachel slid off the stool.
"How've you been?" she asked him.
Finn shrugged. "As well as I can be right now."
Rachel nodded. "I'm sorry I left things so abruptly on Saturday, I was just-"
"I know," Finn said reassuringly. "It's okay. This was a big thing for you."
Rachel twisted the fingers on her left hand. "Yeah, it was."
Finn looked at her expectedly, waiting for her answer. That was why she asked him to meet her in the auditorium after all.
Rachel tried to breathe evenly. "I've never been so nervous about anything before. Not like this. And there was just so much pressure because I don't want to upset either of you. And that's basically impossible right now."
"I don't think you could ever upset me," Finn said.
Those words stung Rachel hard. She closed her eyes and swallowed. "Finn," she said quietly.
Finn's expression changed instantly. His face went from gently supportive to complete disbelief. He couldn't speak. All the air seemed to have been sucked out of his lungs.
"I'm sorry." Rachel released her left hand. Her right hand held out the engagement ring to Finn.
Finn was frozen. He didn't expect this to happen at all, it caught him completely off-guard.
"You're - you're-" he stammered.
"This wasn't an easy decision, Finn," Rachel said. She tried very hard not to cry, but she knew he was really upset. "But I can't lie to you or to myself."
Finn's hand slowly moved up and took the ring from Rachel. "I just..." He couldn't finish his sentence.
"I'm so sorry, Finn."
He just shook his head and walked away. Right before he stepped off the stage, he turned back around. "I don't understand."
"It's a little confusing for me, too," Rachel admitted. "But I know this is the right thing to do."
"Right for who, though?" he asked.
"Both of us," Rachel said. "If I were to stay with you, I wouldn't be happy. In turn, that would make you unhappy. We'd just grow to resent each other."
"So, basically you agree with Quinn?" he said bitterly.
"She's right. If we'd gotten married, it would have been a huge mistake."
Finn felt like he couldn't even look at Rachel anymore. He turned and walked off the stage and out of the auditorium. Rachel wiped away a tear. It was over. The hard part was over.
Meanwhile, Quinn was busy transferring books from her locker to her arms when she saw something race past her out of the corner of her eye. She turned to find Finn storming down the hall looking upset. Right afterwards, her phone went off. She pulled it out of her purse and her heart skipped when she saw she had a text from Rachel.
can you come to the auditorium?
Her breath caught in her chest. She quickly dumped all her books in her locker, shut it, and went to the auditorium. She tried not to get too excited, though. Maybe Finn being upset in the hallway had nothing to do with Rachel. It could've been something else.
She pushed the door open and went inside the auditorium from backstage. She found Rachel sitting on a stool, fiddling with her cell phone in the pocket of her dress.
Quinn stepped out onstage. "Hey."
Rachel turned. "Hey." She quickly slid off the stool.
"I got your text," Quinn said as Rachel walked closer to her.
Rachel nodded. "Well, I uh, I did a lot of thinking, and I came to a decision."
Quinn nodded, urging her to go on.
"I gave Finn back the engagement ring."
It felt like clouds clearing after a storm. Quinn realized she'd been holding her breath after Rachel said she came to a decision.
"You did?" Quinn asked.
Rachel nodded again. "Well, today Kurt asked me, after a few days of not talking to either of you, who I missed more. And," she shrugged, a slow smile forming on her face, "it was kind of obvious."
Quinn smiled back. "Was this your plan all along? To have that be the big decision maker?"
"Uh no, not really. I just didn't want either of you to try and sway this whole situation your way. The 'who do I miss more' part was Mercedes' idea."
Quinn let out a breathless laugh. "I can't believe it," she said. "I can't believe you chose me."
"But wait, I have to ask," Rachel said. "When I told you about Finn's proposal, you told me I shouldn't bring any 'anchors from my past' into my future because you weren't." She made air quotes. "Did you change your mind or something?"
"About you? Never. All that stuff about anchors from your past was mostly about you. When you first told me about Finn proposing, I almost told you how I felt right then and there. Instead, I tried to show you how much better off you'd be without him."
"But really, you just wanted me to be with you."
Quinn nodded. "Pretty much."
Rachel looked down. She realized that she had taken both of Quinn's hands in her own. She looked Quinn directly in her hazel eyes. She felt her heart race.
"Is your heart beating really fast right now?" Quinn asked her. She moved in a little closer.
Rachel nodded.
"I really wanna kiss you right now," Quinn breathed, their noses inches from each other's.
"Do it," Rachel said back.
Her breathing uneven, Quinn leaned in very slowly. Goosebumps erupted on their arms when their noses touched. Quinn leaned in another inch and their lips finally met. Quinn's hands let go of Rachel's and found her waist. Rachel's own hands trailed up to Quinn's shoulders, holding onto her tightly. Quinn's lips parted to catch Rachel's in between.
It seemed like hours before they finally broke apart. As soon as they found each other's eyes, they started giggling breathlessly.
"Can you believe it?" Rachel asked, smiling widely.
"Finally," Quinn sighed.