This is a series of 4 oneshots. It takes place after the truth about "Jake" is revealed at the wedding and how Sam deals with the fall out.
Fighting
Sam was having a hard time keeping her feeling under control. All she really wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry for the rest of her life. In the span of a week, the truth about Jake Doe being her husband Jason Morgan was revealed, at his wedding to another woman, and her relationship with Patrick Drake was officially over. After the truth came out that Jason was still alive, Patrick felt that there was more to Robin being gone than she was saying. Two days ago, he came to her saying that this had all been an eye opening experience for him and he needed to know what happened with Robin. He didn't know that not an hour before he came back to the home he had asked her and her son to share with him and his daughter, Jason had been there asking her for a divorce. He said that they had been around each other for over a year and his memory still was not back, but he did have the memory of loving Elizabeth. He was not mean about it and Sam could tell that he was having a hard time asking this of her because he didn't want to hurt her. But it had shattered Sam's heart. She had kept her tears at bay and told him that she agreed. There was no future for them if he didn't remember her or their love. She told him that she would have her mom file the paper work and hopefully they would be divorced within the next month.
Sam saw something in his eyes as he walked away. It was almost as if he were forcing himself to do this but she shook that feeling off. Jason had had memories of her, she knew he had because he had told her so. If those memories weren't enough for him to want to know their past, then there was nothing she could do about it. The best thing she could do is move on. Her little boy was going to be so confused with everything that has been happening. She had yet to tell Danny that the guy he hero worshipped was actually his father. She wasn't sure how to go about doing that. As she packed up the rest of her things in Patrick's house, she tried to convince herself that this was for the best. She had Danny and that was all she needed. If Jason didn't see anything in those memories of her that was worth fighting for, why should she?
Before she could do anything else there was a knock at the door. She went to go and answer it and saw Carly standing on the other side of the door.
"Hey, what are you doing here? Is everything ok?" Sam asked.
"I ran into Patrick at the hospital a few minutes ago. He was talking to the COS about taking time off. He told me what was going on." Carly said. Her eyes went behind Sam and saw that there were boxes all around. "You already packed?"
Sam turned and looked at the living room and said "Yeah. I just want to get out of here as soon as I can. My dad, Lucas and Brad are going to be here soon to pack everything over to my old apartment. My mom and sisters are there now cleaning it out. Come in." Sam moved out of the way and let her inside.
"So how are you? And don't say fine because I know you are anything but." Carly said.
Sam sighed and said "Considering everything going on I think the fact that I am still standing lets me know I will be ok."
"Sam, why are you doing this? You know as well as I do that Jason belongs with you. Why are you just standing by and letting Elizabeth win?" Carly said turning to her.
Sam shook her head "Carly…"
"No, don't 'Carly' me. Jason was never happy with Elizabeth. He didn't know how to be. Their entire relationship was built on a lie and I am pretty sure it still is." Carly vented.
Sam wasn't sure what she meant by that but she decided to let it go. "Carly, there is nothing to win in this. Jason is not some prize he is a person. I am not going to stand in his way if it is Elizabeth he wanted to be with." Sam tried to reason with her.
"No, I know Jason, Sam. He was never happy with her." Carly argued.
"He has been for the past 7 months." Sam pointed out.
"Jake Doe was happy with her. Jason is not Jake Doe."
"Maybe not but it is not our job to tell Jason how to live his life. Carly, Jason has been through nothing but hell the past three years of his life. People twisting him and using him to their advantage. Do you really think that I am happy with the way things have worked out? Jason is the love of my life and he is alive and well but he doesn't remember me or our life together. I can't be one of those people who takes his happiness away from him. I could play on his guilt and have him back but that is not the person I am. Yes, I want to be with Jason but more than that I want Jason to have his own choice. I want him to decide what makes him happy. And if that is not me then I can live with it. All I have ever wanted was for him to be happy."
Sam felt the tears running down her face by the time she was done and wiped them away. Carly watched as her heart broke with every word she was saying. Carly knew that Sam meant it but Carly also knew that this was going to be the hardest thig she was going to have to do. To watch as the love of her life moved on with another woman and another family, and not be able to do anything about it.
Jason stepped up to the door of his best friends' house. It had been a week since he found out who he really was and it had not gotten any easier. Since that day he had felt like he was living the life of a fraud. Waking up in Elizabeth's house and trying to be the same guy that he as before. But he wasn't. he was Jason Morgan. He had a wife and a son. He had a family and he had not been treating them the way they should. Today he found out that Sam and Patrick were no longer together. Elizabeth had come home and told him how Patrick wanted to find Robin and bring her home. When he asked her about Sam she had a strange look of satisfaction on her face when she said they were over and Sam and Danny were moving out. He had immediately called Sam and asked her if she was ok. She said that she and Danny were going to be fine and that she was moving back into her old apartment until she could find a house for her and Danny. A part of Jason was glad that she was no longer with Patrick. Even before he found out who he was, he had a weird jealous feeling whenever he saw them together.
But the other part of his knew how much hurt Sam was in right now. It was like he could feel it himself. Just like the day he had asked her for the divorce. He wasn't even sure that he wanted one but when Elizabeth said that he spent a year being around Sam and his memory has not fully come back yet, maybe it was a sign that he needed to move on. He did remember the life that they had shared the last few months and he needed to let go of his past and let himself move on. And he figured she was right so he had asked Sam for a divorce. But as soon as the words past his lips all he wanted to do was take them back. Especially when he saw the look in her eyes. He could see her heart breaking in them despite her agreeance of getting the divorce. Jason knew in his heart that it was wrong. He knew he should not be fighting what he was really feeling so hard but he didn't know how to stop it. That is how he found himself standing outside of Sonny and Carly's door. The day after he found out the truth he had went to see Sonny and as he looked at the man in the wheel chair he could see why they had been friends. Despite their awkward start, Jason had found talking with Sonny to be easy.
He raised his hand to knock on the door and a few moments later, Max opened the door. "Jason, come in." the man said.
"Hey, is Sonny in?" Jason asked him. Max nodded his head and said "Mr. C is in the living room." He pointed the way and Jason walked through the door.
"Jason, hey. Come in." Sonny said from where he was sitting at his desk. Jason walked into the room and Sonny wheeled himself from behind the desk. "What brings you by?" Sonny asked.
Jason took a deep breath and said "I'm not really sure why I am here. All I know is that I needed to talk and this as the first place I thought of."
Sonny nodded his head and said "What's on your mind?"
"Sam." Was all he said.
A smile creeped across Sonny's face and he said "Well she is your wife so I would say that shouldn't be a shock."
"I asked her for a divorce." Jason blabbed.
The smile on Sonny's face fell and he asked "Why did you do that?"
"I don't know. It's been running through my mind since I said it. My head and Elizabeth say it is the right thing to do but my heart…" he stopped mid-sentence.
"Jason, Elizabeth does not make your decisions for you. Do not let her play on your guilt again. It ruined your life the last time you did that." Sonny told him.
Jason looked at him confused and asked "What are you talking about?"
Sonny narrowed his eyes and said "Elizabeth didn't tell you about the past you share with her?"
"Well yeah but she never said anything about quilting me."
Sonny laughed coldly and whispered "Not surprised."
"What are you talking about, Sonny?" Jason asked.
"Jason, Elizabeth asked you to give up Jake. She didn't want you in his life."
Jason looked at him in shock. That was not what she had told him. "Liz said I wanted to give him up and she asked me not to. She said that we wanted to be a family but my life was too dangerous and I didn't want to put them at risk."
Sonny nodded his head and said "That is partly true. You didn't want to put them at risk, but she is the one that asked you to give him up and let Lucky raise him."
Sonny wheeled himself closer and said "I have always tried to stay out of your love life, unless you come to me to talk. But I wished like hell when you came and told me this that I had given you a different answer. I wish I had stopped to think about what I was saying but I didn't. All I saw was that you were hurting without your son, and I sympathize."
"You wanted me to make things work with Elizabeth?" Jason asked.
Sonny nodded his head and said "Yeah, I did. I tuned out Sam and her hurt and remained loyal to you. And if I had been truly a loyal friend to you I would have told you to tell Sam the truth and listen to your heart."
Sonny took a deep breath and said "You now, after your accident, one of the times that your mom and I had a civilized conversation about you, she told me something. She told me that when you woke up from the accident, your brain was different but your heart was the same. Before your accident, you listened to your heart more but after you were only listening to your brain. That's why she thought you were pushing them away and now that I think about it, she might have been right. Because here you sit once again, struggling with a decision your brain made, but your heart is telling you it is wrong." Sonny leaned forward and told him "What made Jason Morgan Jason Morgan was not his memory loss or his job. It was his heart. You may not have the memories of your life with Sam, but can you honestly sit here and look me in the eyes and say that you don't even want to try?"
"You now he can't, Sonny. But that doesn't mean he is going to do a damn thing about it." They both turned their head and looked to the door way to see a very pissed off Carly standing there.
"Carly, what's wrong?" Jason said as he stood up.
"What's wrong? I'll tell you what's wrong. I have a best friend with his head so far up another woman's ass that he can't see the way he is slowly destroying his wife!" Carly said loudly as she threw her purse on the desk. "I just came from seeing Sam. I went to go and pick up Sonny's scrips at the hospital and ran into Patrick who told me that he and Sam were over and that Sam and Danny were moving out because he wanted to find Robin. And then he told me that not 2 hours before, you were telling Sam, your WIFE, that you wanted a divorce so that you could go on playing house with the town whore."
Jason closed his eyes and said "Carly…"
"Shut up! You don't get to talk right now all you get to do is listen. What the hell is wrong with you? Are you so damn determined to erase all of you past that you just write off your wife and your son to do it?"
"No, Elizabeth is." Sonny said. The look of rage that came over his wife's face was priceless. Jason looked back to Sonny with wide eyes and Sonny innocently shrugged. Sonny knew that Carly would get through to Jason so he did what needed to be done.
"You are letting Elizabeth make your decisions for you? After finding out you have been nothing but a pawn in the hands of Helena and Nikolas Cassadine, you are actually letting someone else influence you?" Carly demanded.
"Carly, I don't remember Sam and our life together. How is it fair to put her through that?"
"How is it fair to her to not ever try?" She asked. "Jason, how many memories have you had of Elizabeth?"
"Just the one after I woke up in the hospital." He said.
She nodded her head "Now how many have you had of Sam?" Jason looked down and Carly said "How many Jason?"
"A fair few." He answered.
"And I guess they didn't mean a damn thing to you, did they? Those feelings that you have been having for Sam and don't even try to deny in because I have seen the way you look at her." Carly walked closer to him and said "I just came from watching the love of your life completely break down because all she wants of for you to be happy, even if it is not with her. All she wants for you Jason, is to be able to make your own choice. But Elizabeth? Has she even asked you what you want? Or has she been holding on to you so tightly that she is barely letting you breathe?"
Jason looked at her and was finding it hard to ignore the truth in her words. "Sam let you go so that you can find your happiness at the expense of her own. Elizabeth only wants you happy with her. Now you tell me which one of them truly loves you more?" Carly asked him.
Jason shook his head at her. Sonny could see that he was still fighting his heart. "You know I was the one that had to tell Sam that you were gone. It was the day after you got Danny back. You and Sam had decided to be together and be a family. You didn't even know that Danny was really your son at that point, all you knew what that you loved him and Sam with everything in you. When I came to that door, I knew I was going to be ripping Sam's heart out but she had to hear it from me. She refused to believe it. She went down to the dock herself and dove in to look for you. And for months that was all she did because she knew in her heart you were still out there. And she was right. It was everyone else that was telling her she needed to move of for her sake and Danny's. and she did but she never gave up hope that you would come back. Elizabeth accepted your death and moved one. She never felt you were still out there and she never tried to help find you." Sonny said.
"She was too busy sleeping with your brother to care." Carly said with a smile.
Jason took a deep breath and shook his head. "Jason, you and Sam have been through hell and back a couple of times. You have no idea what you have survived…"
Jason could still faintly hear her but he could no longer see her. His gaze was getting fuzzy and when it cleared all he could see was the face of a little baby girl. He was holding her in his arms and she was sleeping. But what he was feeling was nothing but pain. He realized it was a memory flash and it was the strongest one he had. In all the others he was just seeing things but in this one he was feeling it. As he looked down at the sleeping baby, he felt pain like he had never felt before.
"Jason…Jason!" he shook his head of the memory and looked back to Carly as she was standing right in front of him. She had a concerned look on her face and Sonny had the same look.
"Jason, are you ok?" she asked. Jason stumbled back a little but caught himself. Carly grabbed his arm and led him to the couch.
"Come on sit down. Sonny call an ambulance."
"No, no I'm fine. I just…" "Did you have another memory?" Sonny asked his friend.
Jason nodded his head "But this one was different." "Can you tell us what it was?" Carly asked. Jason reached his hand up and rubbed his chest at the pain he was still feeling. "I don't understand it…" he whispered.
"Just tell us what you saw." Carly said. Jason took a deep breath and said "A baby." Carly and Sonny were both a little confused.
"Ok, was it Danny or Michael?" Carly asked.
Jason shook his head and said "It was a baby girl. I was holding her and she was sleeping but when I was looking at her a was sad. It was painful to look at her." He looked up and saw that Carly was looking over at Sonny and Sonny had the same pain in his eyes that Jason felt. Jason watched as Sonny sucked in a shaky breath and say "She… she wasn't sleeping."
Carly reached over and grabbed her husband's hand and held onto it tightly. Jason looked between the both of them and asked "Do you know how this is?"
Sonny nodded his head "She was mine and Sam's daughter." Jason was taken aback at the answer. "But if I am going to be honest, she as more your daughter than mine." Sonny admitted.
The pain was back in his chest and was getting more severe. "About 12 years ago, Carly and I were married but separated. During that time, I started seeing Sam who was new in town. A couple months later Carly and I decided to get back together but Sam got pregnant. When you found out about it you asked us to let you say you were the baby's father so that Carly wouldn't find out and Michael's family could stay together. It worked for a while but then I decided that I could let another man raise my child so I told Carly the truth. We decided to stay together and Sam and you decided to continue living together. I offer to put her and the baby up in an apartment but she wanted to stay with you and you wanted her to stay also. I was getting jealous of the time you were spending and thought you were trying to be a father to my daughter. All I was seeing was that and not the fact that all you wanted to do was help. You were there for Sam when I wasn't and towards the end of her pregnancy, Sam wanted nothing to do with me. She had grown attached to you and had started to have feelings for her. Everyone could see it."
Jason was in awe of what he was hearing. He and never imagined that this was how he and Sam had gotten together. "What happened to the baby?" Jason asked with a tight throat.
"A few weeks before Sam's due date, I found out that Kristina was my daughter. Long story short Alexis thought I was too dangerous and kept her from me but she got sick and told me the truth. I asked Sam to induce labor so that we could test the aby to see if she was a match for Kristina but Sam said no because there was a 10% risk to her. I understood and let it go. The next thing I knew Sam was in the ER to have an emergency c section. There were complications and…the baby didn't make it." Jason closed his eyes and tried to keep his tears at bay.
"You were the only one that got to hold her." Sonny said.
Jason opened his eyes and looked at him. "Sam was barely alive. And you didn't think it was a good idea for me to see Lila that way."
"Lila?" Jason spoke up.
Sonny smiled softly "Yeah, Lila. Sam wanted to name her after your Grandmother."
Jason wasn't sure what he as feeling. He was sad at having to relive this but finally knowing something about his past with Sam made him feel different about the situation. Like he wanted to know more about their past. He needed to know more.
"Can you tell me a little bit more about me and Sam? I don't think I can ask her to tell me, not after everything I have already put her through." Jason asked. Carly smiled through the tears streaming down her face and Sonny nodded his head.