Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of the characters, nor do I own the song Skyscraper which inspired this fan fic. Skyscraper is by Demi Lovato
Warning: This story involves very detailed self-harm scenes
Gone. It was all gone. She worked so hard to build up this perfect life, and piece by piece it shattered. As one thing broke, she'd find another, but with each new wonderful thing a retching heart break was sure to follow.
Glee!
It started with getting pregnant and losing Finn Hudson. But she had Noah Puckerman, Puck, so that wasn't unbearable. But then she lost Beth, her and Puck's perfect baby girl. It did feel like a loss at first, it was the best decision at the time, and Puck loved her. But then Puck went to juvie, and there was nothing she could do about that.
After that there was Sam Evans. She didn't love Sam, she knew that, but she liked him a lot. He filled a void she hadn't even realized she had. But then Finn wanted her, and she never really got over the loss of him. Because of that she lost Sam, without realizing how much it hurt her.
Finn was back though. He was hers again, which surely meant her perfect life was back. She could even be named Prom Queen to complete that perfection, it was a guarantee. Until Lucy Caboosy came back; the horrible ugly person she used to be came back to haunt her, even though she had worked so hard to get away from that. Who could love her like that?
So it only made sense when she lost Prom Queen, but she'd never understand how Kurt Hummel won. She still had Finn though, at least for a while. But then she lost him to Rachel Berry, little miss perfect. Rachel was taking the one thing she had left, and she didn't even want it; the stuck up bitch rejected Finn at first. With the loss of Finn, Quinn Fabray finally snapped.
When she snapped she gained a new sort of perfection, she became a Skank. If she couldn't be the perfect innocent girl in the school, she'd be the perfect badass. She wouldn't care about anyone or anything. But then she saw Beth, beautiful baby Beth, and reconnected with the horrible woman who took Beth away from her.
Beth was the one thing she did right. Beth was perfect; Beth was Quinn's way to perfection. She wanted to hold her, to love her, to show off her perfection to the world, but Shelby Corcoran wouldn't let Quinn come near Beth until she dropped the new look.
So she lost her new look in hopes of gaining her baby back. She hoped Puck would help her, but instead of helping her he fell for the enemy. That's when she realized she had lost everything; there was nothing and no one left.
Glee!
"Quinn wait," she heard Puck say after she stormed out of the choir room in the middle of Santana's performance of Constant Craving. She would give him one chance to redeem himself, because she needed him, whether she wanted to admit that or not.
"What could you possibly have to tell me now? Did you sleep with any other women who were twice your age or just the bitch who took our baby?" she said to him.
"Where are you going? You're not telling Figgins about Shelby and me, are you? That would get her fired and then she won't have a job or proper finances to support Beth. Don't sabotage your own child's future," Puck said, with sweat beading at his brow. He was nervous, and Quinn could sense it.
"Don't you dare pull that on me! You and Shelby are wrong Puck; she's too old for you and a teacher for god's sakes! And if she loses her job, well that'd just make it easier for me to get Beth back."
"Would you just drop that Quinn! I thought I knocked some sense into that foolish head of yours but I guess not. You aren't getting Beth back, it's not happening. You're going to get the hell out of Lima and go make something of yourself and live a perfect little life," Puck practically screamed, while trying to turn Quinn away from the principal's office.
"Why don't you go back to the choir room and worry about your ancient girlfriend and just leave me alone," she said, and fled to the girl's bathroom.
Glee!
She was alone in the bathroom, thankfully. She reached into her purse and found the cold piece of metal she had left in the bottom. She'd heard of girls doing it before, girls who were broken and desperate like she was. She didn't understand how making yourself bleed and bringing yourself more pain could ever help, but she couldn't think of anything else. So she locked herself in the second stall and took a deep breath.
"Quick like a band-aid," Quinn said to herself as she slashed the broken razor bit across her wrist. Then she felt it; she felt the release she'd needed. Everything she had lost control of in her life didn't matter anymore, because she controlled this. She sat for a moment and enjoyed the different and new pain she was feeling, the emotional pain seeped away with the beads of blood she wiped off with a tissue.
She stayed in that stall for an hour, cutting perfect little marks into her wrist every ten minutes or so, becoming familiar with the cold metal causing a harsh sting and her warm blood rushing to the injured skin, ready to clot and stop the possibility of her death. She could control that too; it was her decision if she went too far, or if she kept the cuts tiny.
Glee!
It was 4:00pm when she finally unlocked the stall door. She went to the sink and washed her hands, wrist, and razor blade. She pulled a few bracelets out of her purse and delicately covered her now red and raw wrist. Before she left she caught herself in the mirror, her short blonde hair straightened and framing her face, glowing with the sense of control she had regained. Her life was hers again.
She walked out to her car absent mindedly thumbing her torn up left wrist. Puck had said she had problems, he didn't know the half of it. Quinn sung to herself as she drove home, singing a song that just a few days ago Kurt and Blaine had sung to Santana; they didn't realize they had picked the wrong imperfect girl.