Not-Lesson 1: It's boring to read something over and over again, so let's spice things up!
Since the very beginning, they only had each other. In those days without a place to call home, among the field of bloody corpses, there was only them. At least, at first.
"You two are too cute to be called demons," the man with long hair said as he patted both their heads.
The one twin shook off his hand before drawing his sword. The other twin did the same.
"Did you find that among the corpses as well? Hiding here among the corpses. Is that the mean you choose the protect yourselves? I'll say it. I'm impressed."
The man slowly reached for the sword tied around his waist. "However,you are not using those swords correctly. There is no meaning in simply wielding a sword if it's just to scare others and protect yourselves."
Contrary to what the two children thought, the man tossed them the sword that was still in its scabbard. The older twin caught it.
"This is my sword. Go on. Take it. But the weight of the burden that comes with a sword is too heavy to carry alone. Until then, support each other."
The two looked at each other for a moment. Awkwardly, they figured a way to hold the sword with the two of them by linking arms and holding the sword vertically.
Seeing this, the man briefly wondered if the sword would connect them or separate them. "If you're interested in learning more about that blade, follow me. However, from now on, you must understand. The blade is not to cut down your enemies, nor is it to cut away your own weaknesses. A sword isn't meant to protect your body. A sword is meant to protect your soul."
A knock sounded at the door to their home. Groggily, Sekishin rose from her bed and glanced at the clock. It was a few minutes before eight. She reached to her right for something before realizing that, because she was too tired last night, she forgot to take it off in the first place.
"Gin, door," she said loudly so that the occupant in the neighboring room could hear.
The only reply was loud snoring.
Sighing for a while, the young woman walked out, still in her sleepwear. The knocking had yet to cease. "Geez, what's wrong with you, knocking so early in the morning?" She knew it wasn't Otose or else she'd be banging on the door instead of politely knocking like this.
Sekishin opened the door to reveal a young boy standing outside. He was ordinary-looking, wearing a pair of glasses on his face and blue clothing.
"Um, good morning, Gin-san," he greeted.
"Who are you?" she asked, not even bothering to correct him on her name. She was mistaken a lot for her brother, especially in the mornings when her bedhead made it impossible to tell that her hair was actually longer that his and her tired eyes looked just like his dead fish eyes.
"Eh? Don't you remember? I'm Shimura Shinpachi from yesterday. You help me rescue my sister yesterday. You hired me yesterday!" The boy rambled on about the little things that happened yesterday, trying to jog her nonexistent memories of the day.
It obviously failed.
"Doesn't ring a bell. You sure you weren't dream—"
"Seki, quit pretending to be me and go get changed," ordered a familiar voice as a familiar hand clamped down on her head. Meanwhile, the boy, Shinpachi, was staring between the two of them like they grew two heads.
"Twins!?"
Almost half an hour later, Sekishin reemerged from her room, dressed properly. She wore a dark red furisode tied with a yellow-orange obi. Both of her hands were covered by sleeves that were too long and sway with each movement. Her hair was combed, and, though possessing the Sakata signature natural perm, it was clear that it was shoulder-length.
"You're a girl!?" Shinpachi exclaimed. He sat at one on the sofas next to the coffee table. Her brother was sitting at his desk, leaning against the chair and putting his feet on the desk as always.
"No, Sekishin has a habit of cross-dressing, so you can't be sure," said Gintoki.
"Nice to meet you. I'm Sakata Sekishin, Seki for short. Sekishin is spelled with the kanji for sincerity," she introduced before turning to her brother, who had snorted at the meaning of her name. "You never told me you had a new employee. Had I known, I would've cooked sekihan last night."
"You aren't allowed to go anywhere near the kitchen."
"So, Megane-kun, was it?" Sekishin asked, ignoring Gintoki.
"My name's Shinpachi."
But the woman ignored him and continued speaking. "My brother's a bit of a hopeless cause—"
"Oi!" her brother protested.
"— and I'm the real moneymaker of the family, but don't let that bother you and enjoy your employment."
"Um, okaay?"
"Would you like some tea?" she asked when no one spoke up for a minute.
"Strawberry milk," Gintoki protested, but by then, his sister was already in the kitchen. Minutes later, she balanced a tray holding two steaming cups on one hand.
"Here's your tea," she said, setting the tray on the table.
"Oh, thank you." Shinpachi reached out to hold a cup and took a sip. "It's good."
Gintoki grunted. "It's the only thing she can make. It better be good."
"The complete opposite of my sister," Shinpachi mumbled, recalling the number of time Otae boasted that only her tamagoyaki were good when really, no one was suicidal enough to tell her otherwise.
That was how the first new addition to the Yorozuya met the twin of Sakata Gintoki.
Some weeks later, after going on a few jobs with Gintoki, one of which being to catch a runaway pet which happened to be a monster alien rampaging the streets, Shinpachi finally decided to ask a question that had been weighing on his mind since the first day he came to the Yorozuya to find out that Sekishin was absent because she went to work.
"Seki-san, what is your job?"
"I receive paychecks."
"That isn't an actual job!"
"It isn't? But you know, jobs are things where you do something and get money in return. So my job is to get a paycheck, and by doing that, I get money," she reasoned.
She was as crazy as Gin, not that that was anything surprising. Breathing a resigned sigh, Shinpachi tried a different question.
"No, but where do you work?"
"In Edo."
"That much is obvious!"
Sekishin only smiled.
"Hey, Shinpachi! Forget about her for a moment. You coming with me to buy ingredients for sukiyaki?" Gintoki asked.
"Can I come, too?" his sister asked.
"No. My scooter can't carry three people at once. You trying to kill it?" Gintoki asked, not knowing that later, his scooter would have to carry three people.
~()~
At lunchtime, Gintoki, Sekishin, and Shinpachi were sitting at a table in Otose's Snack. In front of Gintoki was an almost-finished parfait.
"My, the number of employees just increased," Sekishin remarked after the two recounted their adventure that occurred earlier. "You sure you can pay them?"
"I'll figure something out," grumbled Gintoki.
Sekishin looked at the counter. Standing behind it was Otose. Sitting in front was a young, red-haired girl wearing Chinese clothes, asking for another bowl of rice.
"Gintoki, who the hell is this girl? She's eaten five bowls already!" the old woman exclaimed.
"Five bowls. That's just the beginning," Shinpachi lamented.
"We only have sugar and salt left at home," Gintoki added.
"This one seems to have a black hole for a stomach." Sekishin added her own two cents after seeing the girl start eating directly from the rice cooker.
"What the!? You're still eating! Somebody stop here!"
After somehow satiating Kagura's hunger and giving her a something to drink, Otose sat down next to Shinpachi, and the two recounted their adventure for a second time.
"I see. So that girl left her country to earn money, so you decided to let her stay until she has enough to pay for a ticket back home," Otose summarized. "You're really stupid. You can't even pay your own rent. Well, half of the rent really, but that makes it more pathetic. What are you going to do with that eating machine?"
"I'd help, but I think I'm better off sticking to paying the food costs and Gin's gambling debts," said Sekishin. This earned her a crushing hand on her head. The woman slid down until she was no longer on the seat and her head was half below the table.
"Anyway, don't get me me wrong," the silverette started. "I didn't want to live with that pig in the first place." A glass full of ice came flying at his head, shattering from the impact. There was a thud as the head fell forward and hit the table.
"What are you guys talking about?" Kagura asked, her drink having "mysteriously" disappeared.
"Nothing," Shinpachi answered quickly.
"Ow." Ginpachi slowly rose, putting a hand on his head.
"Gin, you alright?" wondered his sister.
"Does it look like I'm alright?" the brother snapped back.
A cat woman in a kimono came over and offered him a handkerchief. "You should use this for your head."
"Huh? I don't remember seeing you around here. Are you new?"
"Yes, I just started this week," she replied. "My name is Catherine."
"Catherine came here to work for money, also, to go back to her country," Otose explained.
"Wow, she's completely different that someone who came to raid my fridge." Another glass flew at Gintoki's head. Sekishin was amazed there was no blood yet.
"What are you guys talking about?" the culprit asked.
"Nothing." This time, it was Otose and Catherine who answered.
The door to the snackbar rattle open. "Excuse me," a semi-bald man said. Another equally bald man stood beside him. Holding a police badge, he told the occupants, "We're from the police station. Would you cooperate with us in an investigation?
"Did something happen?" Otose asked.
"There has been a string of cases where stores in this area are being robbed. It turns out that the culprit is an Amanto that came to this country illegally. I hear a lot of them work around here. Do you guys know anything about it?"
"Yes, I know the culprit is this person right here." Gintoki pointed at Kagura, who immediately broke his finger.
"What the hell did you do?"
"I don't like stupid jokes."
"You wanted to go home, right? Don't you want to get sent back there?!"
"I don't want to go back with dishonor. If I have to, I'll hang on to a ship and go back. It worked when I came here, so I'm sure it'll turn out okay."
"Dishonor, my ass! You're a criminal!"
In the midst of the two's argument, one silverette noticed Catherine sneak away through the back entrance.
"Well, I guess there's nothing here," the policeman stated.
"Nothing here except for some idiots." Sekishin quickly dodged one flying glass, courtesy of Gintoki.
"You're paying for that," Otose shouted. She turned back to the officer. "Anyway, please leave now. I would never hire a person like that."
The tell-tale sound of Gintoki's scooter starting up directed everyone's attention to the entrance. A scooter drove past with Catherine behind the handlebars and a pile of objects tied to the back.
"Farewell, stupid lady," the cat woman said, giving a two-finger salute before speeding off.
"Catherine!" Otose shouted. "I never thought she'd do such a thing."
"Otose-san, the cash register's gone!"
"Hey, my scooter's gone, too."
"Ah, so is my umbrella."
It took less than one second for the two to figure it out.
"That butt-ugly alien!" Gintoki screamed.
"We've been victimized!" Kagura yelled.
The Yorozuya clamored into the car the was conveniently parked close by, which happened to be a police car.
While the policeman desperately yelled at them to stop, Otose was wondering where Sekishin was.
The woman in question was already in the police car, sitting in the driver's seat, causing Kagura to seat next to Shinpachi in the back. Once all doors were closed, she stepped on the accelerator.
"Hey, wait! Calm down!" Shinpachi reasoned, sounding the least calm out of all of them. "It's not our job to do 's only a scooter and an umbrella!"
"Shinpachi, I don't care about my bike right now. Actually, I forgot to take out the video I borrowed from the store yesterday. If I don't get it back, my late fees will go through the roof," his boss confessed.
"What's wrong with your thought process?!"
"Don't worry about your late fees," Kagura assured. "In a bit, we're going to get all the money in the register."
"You have an ugly heart behind those beautiful eyes!"
"Hey, wait a minute, Kagura. I thought you were in the driver's seat. What are you doing back there?" Gintoki asked.
"I thought you were in the driver's seat," Kagura replied.
As one, the trio stared at the mysterious driver.
"Ahem. Good day, this is your driver speaking. At the moment, we are still on the tail of a thieving cat. Please buckle your seatbelts, cease all talking, and try not to be disruptive as we will soon be picking up speed," the driver advised.
"Seki, do I need to remember the last time you drove?" Gintoki asked his sister, who had only her right hand on the steering wheel while her left laid still on her lap. "Oi, Seki—"
Sekishin immediately pushed the accelerator down to the floor, making Gintoki bite his tongue.
"Ow!"
"I warned you."
"Hey, wait, slow down! We're going to crash. The video's going to break!"
"You're still worried about the vide—" Shinpachi was the second to bite his tongue after Gintoki reached over and slammed the brakes. There was an ear-splitting squeal shortly after, and Shinpachi couldn't decided which hurt more: his tongue or his ears.
"Ah, what are you doing!? She's getting away!" Kagura pointed out.
Catherine took advantage of the sudden stop and the compact size of the scooter and turned on to a narrow alley.
"Gin, foot off the brake and help with turning." Gintoki quickly removed his foot and reached out to grab the wheel. Sekishin hit the accelerator again and together, the twins turned the wheel quickly.
Shinpachi was given no time to wonder why Gintoki had to turn the wheel as well, since he was soon panicking because the car was too wide for the alley and scraped off the sides of the buildings.
"Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! We're doing worse things than Catherine!"
But Kagura only laughed and shouted, "Die Catherine!" excitedly.
They emerged out of the alley and back on the open road. Or so they thought. Immediately in front was another narrow road running perpendicular to the alley and past that road was a river. No one could hit the brakes quickly enough to stop the momentum, and the car drove on air for less than a second before falling into the river.
"We're sinking!" Shinpachi panicked.
"Calm down, unbuckle the seatbelt, and get out of the car. The door should still open on your side," said Sekishin.
Gintoki grabbed her by the back of the kimono and dragged her out, eliciting a laugh from her.
"What's so funny? You just crashed the car!" Shinpachi yelled.
"She's denying reality right now," Gintoki explained.
"Oh, Hijikata-san's going to kill me when he finds out about this," Sekishin muttered softly enough so that only Gintoki could hear.
"Not my problem."
They heard a scooter revving up and looked up at the bridge over head. On one end was Catherine. On the other was Otose, who was finishing telling Catherine about an event in the past.
Gintoki set Sekishin down on dry land—which was the part of the police car that had yet to sink—and ran up to the bridge, bokuto in hand. With the swing of his arm, Catherine was hit on the head and knocked out. The unmanned scooter fell to the ground and stopped a few feet in front of Otose.
Minutes later, the policemen—It seemed they had an extra police car lying around somewhere—handcuffed a now conscious Catherine and brought her inside the car.
"She said she'd repay the favor for giving her a job, but people that don't repay favors have such disgusting hearts," Gintoki said.
"Ha. And a guy that doesn't pay rent and lives on someone else's second floor doesn't?" retorted Otose.
"And that means I have a pretty heart?" wondered Sekishin as she watched Shinpachi trying to stop Kagura from walking away with a cash register.
"Granny, all humans have ugly hearts. And Seki, your heart is completely black."
She shrugged. "Black can be a pretty color, too."
"Not when it's on you."
"Not when it's on you either. Go change that black shirt into something a bit more colorful, like puke green."
"Red looks horrible on you, too. Go change it to neon yellow, so you can blind everyone."
"Then you get rid of that stupid-looking white and replace it with pastel pink!"
Listening to their quarrel, Otose shook her head. "Twins. Well, since you saved me today, you don't have to pay this month's rent."
"Thanks, Granny. I'll be sure to pay next next month."
"Why are you skipping next month?!"
"'Cause I'm using it to buy Seki a new kimono!"
"It better be a nice color or else I'm buying you a new shirt!"
I love Seki, even if she turns out to be a Mary Sue. Then again, I'm just biased. Now, Sekishin is (if my source is right) the name of a sword used by a historical figure. And it's written as 赤心. The first part means red, the second means heart. So even though it means sincerity, it can also mean red heart. It kind of matches of Gintoki meaning silver time and Gintama meaning silver soul.
So, hey, Sekishin's a pretty weird name, but oh well. It has meaning to it.
Please review and tell me your thoughts! XD