In life, you can always find yourself asking why about almost anything. Why did you do this? Why did you say that? It's human nature to question the things that have developed in the world around you; it's nothing new. Most get answered through a conversation or by a search through the library. However, for the questions that won't ever be answered by your simple sources, these will leave you confused and dazed for hours. It was just after a vacation I'd taken when Guy told me about a mission that had gone horribly wrong. It sent the world crashing down around me and the inquiry of why's begin. Yet, out of the hundreds of question all balled together in my head, one stood out above them all. Why did this have to happen?

The walk to the Hokage's office was quiet and somber, neither his friends nor I one willing to speak through the sadness that had settled over us all. The news that Guy had presented to me tugged at my heart strings, making them throb and ache for comfort. When the group finally stood before the Hokage in his office, the waterfall of tears finally fell from the old woman's eyes. His friends and Tsunade wept together in silence. There was nothing I could do to make anyone feel better in their time of need, in my time of need. I left the room then. I sat underneath the trees, alone, and in the dark. It was then that the silently sobbing started. Why did this have to happen? That one question had been echoing in my head ever since I left my home in the village to meet up with the distraught Hokage. Why did this have to happen to him? It was a chant that just wouldn't go away, a distant calling that rang in my ears. Why did he have to go? I felt suffocated by the pressure of the situation at hand, drowning in a pit of despair. Why did he have to die?

It was a musky day for a funeral; hot and humid along with the sorrow of it all. Inside of the funeral home where the wake was taking place, it was cold as if the grim reaper's hands were upon you. I sat on the benches in the front where the lone and small casket stood sadly before the crowd. The wood of the benches is cold to the touch and keeps splintering into my hands. I looked to my left. Iruka is hugging himself, with a hand over his mouth to keep his loud sobs at bay. I turn to my right. Guy's head is hung, his black bangs covering his eyes but you could clearly see the lines of tears running down his face in a silent display. Standing in between the two, I am as frozen as a stone. My heart aches and my throat feels constricted. I felt the need to be strong for my friends and those that cared about him. I tried my hardest to keep the tears at bay but they just kept roaming in my eyes. It wasn't long until the casket opened and we were allowed to come see our loved one. There was a long line which went by like a snail on a highway, slow but frantic. After what seemed like an eternity, it was finally my time to see him and tell him all the things I never got to say before his passing. I needed to remind him that I loved him. That I will love him forever. However, I felt those very words caught in my chest as I stared down at him. The man's eyes are closed with small crinkles at the side of his face with a smile upon his lips. He was dressed in orange garments, his favorite color, which seemed to show just how skinny he had been before he'd died. Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze was the man's name and as I walked away from his coffin with tears finally streaming down my face, that same question roared out to me. Why did this have to happen?

After the wake, everyone seemed to drag their feet towards the room with rows and rows of food was held. Compared to how it smelled, the food was actually really bland which was quite fitting compared to what day it is. Most of the adults found themselves sitting together in the corner talking about who-knows-what. I didn't go over there. I couldn't. My heart wouldn't allow it. I look over curiously at them before noticing that my students – all grown and married by now – started tearing up after something was said. Sasuke rubbed his wife's shoulder as his deep voice rang through, trying to calm her down. Sakura laid her head on his chest, crying over the loss of one of her best friends. Sasuke tried holding back his sadness, but Naruto was like a brother to him. The two wept. I hated it.

It was around two in the afternoon when everyone went their separate ways towards Naruto's grave site. We all started one-behind-another down the street, other's looking at us in wonder or curiosity. I'm not so sure anymore. My world has become darker since he's left us. My students stand in front of me. They glance back to see if I'm alright. When everyone finally made it to the graveyard, we found ourselves gathered around a hole in the ground. Naruto's closed casket is hanging over it. I let the sorrow finally cloud my stubbornness as I cried before his grave. Tsunade gave a speech then, bringing those around to tears. As they lowered him down six feet under, the loose dirt around finally being pushed over in a finally farewell, I realized that he's never coming back to me. No amount of Kyuubi's chakra can bring the love of my life back. No amount of medical ninjutsu can bring him back to life. Nothing. It was then that the bane of my existence screamed at me in the form of a question. Why did this have to happen?

In life, there is always a question that needs to be answered. You said that out of impulse. You did this because you wanted to. It's human nature to strive for an answer to satisfy your curiosity; it's nothing new. Most questions have answers that have come to be over time. However, for those that won't ever get a reply, you find yourself going to the nearest solution whether it is right or wrong. It was just after the funeral when my world finally pieced together and my questions finally pieced together. Though, one won't ever have the reply I so strived for. Why did this have to happen? For whatever reason, I found that I couldn't ever find the answer.

I'll never find the answer.