Yep, yep, yep... new story. And this one's a little bit more mature.
I really wanted to do something that gave justice to Deadpool. At the same time, I wanted to delve into the world of Scarlet Spider, Kaine Parker. And then I saw some awesome artwork of Elektra and Psylocke... in various... um, battle poses. Yeah. Sure.
No, seriously. I want to do this, and I warn young readers... it's gonna be rated M for a reason. I think this is my first M rating since Stroke of Death. So yeah.
BUT. I wanna pair Kaine up with Elektra. I also wanna pair him up with Psylocke. I don't know what to do! So please. I'll leave it all up to you guys. You decide who gets it on with whom. I'm up for literally... anything.
HAND IN HAND
Opening
"Is there any way I can convince you not to collect on his bounty?"
Kaine Parker eyed his opponent warily, circling him in the dark alley. Opposite him, imitating his every move, Deadpool swung his sword in an arc.
"'Fraid not," he said, his voice grating on Kaine's ears. "I mean, it's enough to cover my orthodontic work I had done recently. Do you know how expensive dentures are?!"
"I'm surprised you didn't just kill the doctor afterwards," Kaine said sarcastically.
"No, I did. I still need to pay the hook- I mean… the nurse."
Kaine snorted, still moving. The price placed on his head was high, he knew. He just didn't think anyone would actually be stupid enough to try and collect it. But then again, this was Deadpool.
"No, this isn't Doc Ock Spidey," Deadpool said suddenly. Kaine cocked his head, confused. "This is the Scarlet Spider."
"I'm not the Scarlet Spider," Kaine growled, his temper rising. "And I'm not Spider-Man either. I'll actually kill you."
"You'll try," Deadpool said annoyingly. "Oh, wait. No sword. No gun. No weapons. Poor you. Now, me, on the other hand…"
He pulled out one of his adamantium swords from its sheath. Kaine noticed the other one still in its place. He leapt up, flipping over Deadpool, grabbing it and yanking it out of his sheath.
"Hey, no fair!" Deadpool yelled, tripping forward. "That's cheating! Foul! I cry foul!"
"Cheating?" Kaine repeated, spinning the blade in his hands. "Said the guy who's decked out like a third-world country."
"Dude, that's not cool," Deadpool seethed in a low voice. "It's more like a second-world country. Seriously. Give back."
"Make me," Kaine sneered.
The two red-clad warriors faced each other, both freezing for exactly one second. Then they both charged.
But right before their swords made contact, something hit them both, a massive headache that caused them both to stumble backward.
A psychic attack? Kaine thought, but then all thoughts were wiped from his mind as he dropped to his knees, the pain reaching a blinding peak.
And then the headache stopped. It vanished, as though it had never happened. Kaine quickly got to his feet, but he didn't have to worry about Deadpool. The mercenary was still on the ground, his hands covering his head.
"No… go away… leave them alone…"
"Who?" Kaine said, looking down at him. "Leave who alone?"
"The poor tacos… oh, poor delishus wrappings of heavenliness… OH, THE INHUMANITY!"
Kaine frowned.
"We don't have time for your illusions," he said harshly. "Something just attacked us. Huh… okay, look. Don't kill me, and I won't kill you. Okay?"
"Not an attack."
Deadpool's hand had shot up, a finger in the air. He seemed to have miraculously recovered from his delusions, and now sat up.
"Not an attack?" Kaine repeated, confused. "How do you mean?"
"Because a psychic force that powerful," Deadpool said, "should have killed us. At least, it should have, if it were attacking us. But… it wasn't. It was more of a warning."
"Have you been psychically attack before?" Kaine asked, watching the mercenary stand up.
"Yep," he said. "Many, many times. They usually don't work on me either. Which is why this is… really something else. Something disciplined."
"Fantastic," Kaine said, looking around. He blinked. "Uh… where are we?"
For it had just dawned on him that they were no longer in an alleyway in Texas.
"I don't think we're in Houston anymore, Toto," Deadpool stated, looking around as well. "Can I have my sword back?"
Kaine handed it back without thinking. He didn't really need it. He was more focused on figuring out where they were.
"We seem to be indoors," he said. "It looks like… a training dojo."
It did. Bamboo furnishings were everywhere, and they were standing on a mat. The room was otherwise bare, with the thin wall glowing orange with flickering light from behind it.
"Oh boy!" Deadpool exclaimed, dropping in a battle-ready stance. "It looks like I'm on an adventure! With the Scarlet Spider!"
"I told you," Kaine said, likewise bending his knees, preparing for a fight. "That's not my name."
"Really? The gaudy scarlet suit, and you're not going for the obvious moniker?"
"Not my fault the damn suit is red."
"Scarlet."
"Shut up. It used to be all black."
The flickering light was bothering Kaine. He couldn't quite figure out why…
Until he felt the heat. And then he realized what was wrong.
"It's fire," he said. "The building's on fire!"
At that moment, a hole in the wall formed, a rip through the canvas. Two figures dropped to the floor, both of them unconscious, both of them very obviously female.
"Holy crap in a box, Batman," Deadpool gasped. "That's Psylocke! And Elektra!"
Kaine barely registered the names of the two women he had never seen before. They were wearing somewhat revealing ninja garments, Elektra red, Psylocke blue. Their jet black hair was splayed around their heads, and their faces were marred with soot. Kaine ran forward, picking each them up, on in each arm, and threw them over his shoulders.
"Come on!" he yelled. "We need to get out of here!" Deadpool started, fumbling with the circular device on his chest.
"Right!" he yelled, coming forward, grabbing the front of Kaine's costume. "Hold on! Allonsy!"
The device glowed blue, and Kaine's vision was filled with white. As he was blinded, he realized one thing for certain.
This is going to be a long night.
Let's go! And please, review!