Cat: Hey all, this is about Susan and how she felt after Aslan told her and Peter that they could not return to Narnia. Bear in mind that this was written in the dark, at midnight, after eating too many M & Ms, with Green Day stuck in my head.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of it, and whoever told you that I did lied.
As he spoke Susan felt herself crumble. She broke apart like ice melting on a pond, where larger and large pieces fall away and float off. She wasn't sure if she spoke; if she had it had been with the respect someone of Aslan's status deserved, but without the warmth she usually reserved only for him.
She wondered vaguely if Aslan knew what he was doing her to. Did he realize that she was breaking? She had thought that he had known everything, but why would he sentence her to this? She felt like Eve, thrown from the Garden of Eden. But then, at least Eve had done something wrong.
At home, Susan would wonder if perhaps she had done something wrong. She decided that Aslan had to have been angry with her, but instead of knowing and certainty, her decision seemed more like a vague question. Was he upset with her for leaving Narnia in the first place? Or was he angry with her for returning? Or was it that she had failed to bring Susan the Gentle back into England, whereas Peter, Edmund, and Lucy had all somehow maintained that vitality, and spread it into the word around them?
Some part of her continued to function normally, with the methodical regularity of her heartbeat. In fact, she would later become absorbed into that thoughtless, instinctual part of her. She turned her mind to other, trivial things, and away from the great lion and Narnia.
She didn't think about them, not even once, until much later. Functioning Susan received a telegram informing her of the death of her brothers and sisters. Functioning Susan went to the funeral. Functioning Susan wore all black and completed all those other meaningless tasks that needed to be completed after a death.
But real Susan cried because she was too numb to figure out why Aslan had banned her from Heaven, but invited her siblings in.
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