AN: This isn't my first crack fic, but it is the first fic I ever recall doing in the first-person… It wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be… First-person fics require you to assume the role of the character you are writing, to some extent… so I've always been hesitant to do it because I feel like it's not my place to assume a character's feelings and behavior when it comes to different situations- not when I have to write exactly what is going through their head, anyway… but this one was pretty easy- I was able to impose a personality I had fabricated, since we never get to see things from this guy's perspective, really.
Overall, I think I did a good job. In the end, I wound up making his thoughts focus solely on Misaki… I think this is most appropriate. :3
Warnings: Nothing too bad- BL.
Disclaimers: I own nothing.
=.=.=
You Leave My Heart Bear
=.=.=
"Usagi-san! I'm off to university!" Misaki calls as he kicks his toes against the concrete porch outside, readying to head off for the day. He will never fully understand the depth of my feelings for him.
"Wait! Want me to drive you?"
Misaki shouldn't be forced to walk… what if it rains, or snows, or someone picks him up and does all kinds of horrible things to him?! I just don't know what I'd do if anything bad ever happened to him…
"No thank you. I don't need to be driven every single day, Usagi-san. It's not even that far." Misaki calls back in a huff, then sets off on his journey.
I suppose that's one of the things I love most about him… He's independent, kind, considerate, loving, and he always looks out for others- all of which is more than I could ever possibly hope to do…
Still, for his sake, I wish he wouldn't walk. I wish he would just accept a ride. Again, if anything horrible ever happened to him… I…
I don't know what I'd do…
Surely my whole world would fall apart without him…
He looks after me so tenderly, but sometimes I feel like he can't possibly love me… How could he, anyway? I'm one in a million, and he…
He's… just so…
So…
He's my everything.
=.=.=
"Misaki?!!"
His name echoes off the walls, breaking through an eerie silence. Apparently, he's not home, yet… could he have been abducted? The Usami family is full of way too many annoying individuals who could easily have poached him…
Maybe I should go looking for him-!!! Oh… but I can't… How pitiful…
But then, suddenly, the door opens up and I hear his melodious voice filling this otherwise boring, eerie home in a sweet tone:
"Usagi-san, I'm baaack!"
Usagi-san…
Why is it always 'Usagi-san…?'
WHY?!!
"Misaki…"
"Mm?" Misaki stares back, cocking his head to the side.
"…Never mind… How was school?"
"It was alright," Misaki replies with a heart-stopping smile. "Today, I had a test, and I feel REALLY good about it."
Well of course you do. You never give yourself enough credit, Misaki.
I wish I could tell him how perfect he is, but even if I somehow found it in me to muster up the words, he'd deny it and become flustered- although the reaction itself would be worth it…
"That's good… any plans, today?"
"Ah- my part time job." Misaki answers as he hangs up his scarf and hat. I'm torn between wishing he'd never get chilly and wishing he'd tremble with cold so that he would hold onto me tightly, seeking heat from only me…
"Well, when you get finished let me know. I'll come pick you up… then, tonight we…"
Suddenly I'm full of perverted thoughts- there're so many things I want to see…
Misaki flushing with heat…
Misaki panting, and whimpering, softly in want…
Misaki's legs trembling- his shoulders shrugged- and THAT LOOK on his face…
"Usagi-san! PERVERT!" Misaki yells, and storms up to his room. "I'm going to change real quick, and then I have to head out!"
I watch as smoke from a cigarette put out only moments ago drifts up after Misaki's retreating form. He's so cute when he blushes like that, but I wish…
Oh…
I wish for so many things…
Will my love never be properly returned?
I can only do so much for him…
And that 'so much' is so very little…
It'll never be enough.
=.=.=
"Misaki! I'm here to pick you up!"
"Eh?" Misaki glances over as he puts on his heavy jacket- apparently he'd forgotten about the promise to pick him up.
"Were you going to walk home?"
"Ah… yeah… but…" Misaki smiles an adorable smile- but then, all of his smiles are adorable. "…I'm glad you came… I guess it's snowing kind of hard… please be more careful…"
He climbs in beside me and buckles up, frowning as he brings his knees to his chest and hugs them, there…
Don't hug your knees, Misaki… hug me.
"…Um… please don't take this the wrong way…" He mumbles, suddenly, and I listen closely. It sounds as though he's about to express his feelings, so I listen keenly. "…When it's snowing outside… or raining… please don't come pick me up, anymore… not in the car… um… actually, just stay home."
"…"
Why would he ask such a thing…?
"…I mean… I'm glad you came, but…" Misaki mumbles, softly, unable to look at anything other than the dashboard in front of him. "…But for future reference…"
Why…?
Why would he ask that?
"…Why?"
"…Um… how do I say this…?" Misaki mumbles quietly. "…When it comes to me… you seem like you sort of… can't wait for us to be together…"
"That's true."
"So um… driving recklessly through the rain or snow might cause an… an accident…"
So this is why…
That's right… when Misaki was eight years old, his parents hurried back home in the rain and got into an accident…
And they died…
Leaving Misaki and his older brother all alone…
Oh, Misaki…
Why can't I eradicate your pain?
Why can't I ever be the one to eradicate your pain?!
I love you so much, but you'll never understand…
I'd be willing to climb a thousand mountains or trudge through the iciest of tundra just to find you, if I could…
"…Misaki…"
Your eyes narrow on the dashboard in front of you and you remain quiet, but I know you're listening- you always listen to others.
"…Misaki… nothing bad will ever happen to me. I won't let it. If I'm not around, who's going to care for you and love you and give their heart solely to you…?"
I would.
Misaki flushes and quickly averts his gaze. "…Usagi-san…"
Misaki is so cute…
=.=.=
When we get home, Misaki clings to me tightly as we all head up the stairs.
He still clings to me when he's lain on the bed and touched by a pervert's hands…
But it isn't me he loves.
He loves the pervert that those hands belong to.
Whenever Misaki uses me to shield him from the pervert that is my master, I feel overwhelmed with happiness…
Finally, I'm able to protect Misaki in some way…
Whether it's by separating him from the pervert, hiding his face, or just keeping him warm, I want to be of use to Misaki in any way I can…
He changes my ribbons and talks to me, and holds me and always takes good care of me.
Out of all the other Suzuki-sans, I know I am the favorite. I was the one who he spilled udon on, and ever since I returned from the cleaners, he's always treated me special.
I never realized what love was until Misaki entered the Usami household…
And he will never know…
Suddenly I am cast aside by my master, and Misaki's adoring, aroused and overall beautiful face is revealed.
All I can do is watch as his face contorts in different expressions of pleasure, shame, embarrassment, and occasionally- pain…
All I can do is watch…
Watch as the one I love is ravaged by another- and whether he admits it or not- enjoys every second of it, returning the bastard's love 100%.
All I can do…
Is watch.
=.=.=
AN: Suzuki-san unrequited love /crack fic- COMPLETE.
EDIT: Okay, a lot of people seem to be confused. I meant for it to be that way, but hoped more people would grasp this than others: This ENTIRE fic was done from Suzuki's POV. He's always with them, so he was always there. It came across as though it could possibly be from an OOC Usami's point of view because that was part of the cracky twist. The entire thing, if you go back, is done from Suzuki's POV. Akihiko only provides dialogue and occasionally supplies what could be Suzuki's voiced concerns.
Sorry for the confusion! ;)