Hello! Okay, to clear up any confusion, I rewrote the first chapter. I wasn't pleased with how it was written the first time, and later I actually had a dream (dreams are a very rare occurrence for me) that made more sense, so I decided to rewrite this chapter in the way that I dreamt it! Surely I'm not the first person who's done this. Anyway, as it said in the summary, this fanfic was inspired by "Drums, Girls, & Dangerous Pie" by Jordan Sonnenblick. Several parts in this story will be based off of the events in that novel. Anyhoo, please R&R, constructive criticism is welcome, but flames will not be tolerated. Enjoy! =)

P.S: Oh, before I forget! This is my first time doing a story from a first person point of view (it's usually third person limited), so don't be surprised if this isn't all that great…

IMPORTANT NOTE: This fanfic is dedicated to all cancer patients. I know this isn't much, but God bless you and do get well very soon. I'll be praying for you.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Phineas and Ferb in any shape or form.

Yo. My name's Buford Van Stomm, but just call me Buford. I live in this city called Danville, which is part of the Tri-State Area. This place is okay and all with the scenery and such, but it's really the people that give this place personality. Some of those people are the bystander type (which includes like ninety percent of the population), while others are like me. I take pride in having a strong reputation – that I'm a bully that should never be messed with, unless you want a wedgie…

Another example of the different kinds of people are the quiet, accented, nerdy kind. In other words, Baljeet. He's the nerd that follows me around and does my homework for me (somewhat, anyway). About this time, I'd usually be at his house either giving him a wedgie or forcing him to my math, but right now the nerd is at some…well, nerdy math club meeting.

Therefore leaving me sitting cross-legged on the ground in Phineas and Ferb's backyard, grumbling about random stuff.

"Hey, Buford!" Phineas called, temporarily snapping me out of my funk. "Can you hand me that wrench?"

I shrugged. "Sure, whatever." I picked up the requested item and walked over to where Phineas and Ferb were working on some sort of iron dome. The orange-haired kid had gone back into the dome, but poked his head back out when I came over.

"Thanks, Buford!" Phineas grinned and took the wrench from my outstretched hand. Then he pulled himself back into the dome door, hardhat and all. A few more seconds passed before the sound of whirring and cranking started up again. I casually leaned against the side of the metal dome and crossed my arms, absolutely bored out of my mind. Ever since school begun, there had been hardly anything exciting to do. It was too early in the year for sports, so that was out. The TV at my house is busted, so I could forget about that. I had loads of homework, but who the heck does that for fun? Oh, right…Baljeet…the nerd.

Either way, I was left with absolutely nothing to do. I kicked at the grass in annoyance. When did Phineas and Ferb say they'd be done with that new invention again?

Just then, Isabella appeared at the gate. "Hey, guys!" She greeted happily.

"Hi, Isabella!" Phineas replied as he and Ferb stepped out of the dome. Ferb merely waved.

Wait for it…

"Watcha' doin'?" Isabella asked.

Phineas grinned as he said "Ferb and I just finished our latest invention. We won't have as much time to enjoy it because of school and all, but that's okay!"

Right then, who else but my nerd showed up next to Isabella. "Greetings, friends! Did I hear something about a new invention?"

"Oh, hey, Baljeet! Yeah, we were just about to present it!" Phineas and Ferb both gestured towards the iron dome I was leaning against. "Everyone behold…the Anti-gravity Air Rink!"

I pushed myself back to a standing position and walked over to the group. Meanwhile, Baljeet cocked an eyebrow at Phineas and Ferb. "Air rink? Is that like an ice rink? Will we be participating in some form of hockey?"

The triangular-faced kid nodded. "Yep! We're playing air hockey!"

I rolled my blue eyes. "That game already exists, Einstein!"

"On the contrary," Ferb explained, "This form of air hockey is the same as the version on ice – only without the ice."

Phineas nodded. "Ferb's right, Buford. This is basically ice hockey, only we're going to be in the air!"

I shrugged. "Whatever. So when are we gonna start?"

"Right now!"

Before we knew it, we all had orange and purple (surprise, surprise) jumpsuits on and were hastily led inside the iron dome. Once we were all accounted for, Phineas grabbed some hockey sticks from a grey plastic trunk right next to the entrance. As he passed them out to each of us, he jabbered all about the rules.

I already knew how to play hockey (ice hockey, air hockey, same difference), so I sort of zoned out and peered around the dome. At one point I happened to glance at my nerd, who wasn't looking so hot. I couldn't quite place what it was, but something just wasn't right. Maybe it was the barely visible dark circles under his brown eyes, or the way he would occasionally squirm slightly, as if in pain.

I would've inspected further, but right then 'Jeet noticed me looking at him and turned his head towards me. I cocked a questioning eyebrow at him and silently mouthed, You okay, nerd?

Biting his lip, Baljeet quickly nodded. A little too quickly, if you ask me. Yep, something was definitely wrong.

However, before I could question the nerd further, Phineas announced we would start our game. Ferb rushed over to a control panel that rose from the ground and pressed a big red button in the middle of it. Immediately two green virtual hockey goals appeared floating just above us. Ferb pressed another button, and we all started floating up towards the goals.

Just seconds later, Phineas's eyes widened and he yelled, "Oh, no!"

"What's wrong, Phineas?" Isabella asked.

"I almost forgot the helmets! Safety first, you know!" The orange-haired kid flew down towards the ground and grabbed a small box before drifting back up to us. He opened the box and dumped out its contents, which simply rocked in place due to the lack of gravity. He laughed a little at his forgetfulness and stated, "Alright, everyone, grab a helmet that matches the color of your hockey stick!"

Everyone obeyed and grabbed a helmet. When I saw Baljeet putting on a blue one (the same color I needed), I quickly snatched it off of his head and fastened it on me. The Indian nerd shot me an irritated look.

"Buford! That was mine!" he huffed.

I smirked and replied, "I don't see your name on it."

'Jeet growled and rolled his eyes before grabbing another cerulean helmet. As he latched it on, I looked at the teams. Isabella was with me and Baljeet with our blue head gear, while Phineas and Ferb were on the opposing team sporting violet helmets.

Phineas gazed around before saying, "Uh, oh! There's an odd number of players! We're outnumbered, Ferb!"

The green-haired boy shrugged, then pulled out a black and white referee suit out of absolutely nowhere. He also yanked out a whistle and blew into it, as if to emphasize his intention.

Phineas grinned and said, "You'll be the referee? Great!" He turned towards our team. "Isabella, why don't you come and join me?"

Isabella beamed and merrily obliged. Ferb pulled the referee costume over his jumpsuit and popped the whistle into his mouth. He lifted both his hands, signaling for the game to begin. Instantly we all lunged for the puck that magically manifested in the center of the invisible rink. Small rockets in the feet of our jumpsuits propelled us forth.

I swung at the puck, but Phineas was too fast. He passed the object over to Isabella, who then knocked it into Baljeet and I's goal. Ferb blew the whistle and pointed to Phineas and Isabella, indicating that the first point went to them. He then whirled around and made a tally mark under the words "Team Violet", which was written on a dry erase board that also appeared while no one was looking. Seriously, where the heck was Ferb getting all this stuff?

I turned back towards Phineas and Isabella (now dubbed "Team Violet") and gritted my teeth. There was no way me and my nerd were going to lose this game! The whistle blew again, and this time I doubled my speed in order to reach the puck. Unfortunately, it still wasn't enough, because Phineas still got to it first. I lightly cursed under my breath.

"Darn!" someone exclaimed.

I looked back over and grinned idiotically when I realized that Baljeet had managed to nag the puck from Phineas. Then 'Jeet passed it over to me. I ran (flew?) over to Team Violet's goal, but Phineas and Isabella both blocked me. I knocked the puck under Isabella's legs and over to Baljeet, who then whacked it into the goal. We got the point.

Forty minutes passed, and the scoring juggled between the Blue and Violet teams. Finally, Phineas glanced at the watch on his wrist and said, "Holy smokes! It's already four thirty! This is the last run before the game ends for today, guys. Ferb and I have to get ready for dinner."

"Whatever." I grunted. The game was currently an even 10-10 in score. Me and my nerd could win in plenty of time.

Ferb blew the whistle, and we all practically dived for the puck. I nearly had it, but Phineas scooted the puck away before my stick could hit it. He passed it over to Isabella, but for whatever reason the small object dropped a little bit in altitude – just enough to get under Isabella's foot. She yelped and accidently fell backward, which caused the rocket boosters on her feet to propel the puck upward, through the air…and right into Baljeet's nose.

An almost audible crack followed and the nerd's hands flew up to his nose as he let off a noise that resembled his infamous 'fail wail'. Isabella gasped and rushed over.

"Oh my gosh, Baljeet, I'm so sorry!" She stated with genuine horrified concern. She attempted to check his nose. "Are you okay?"

'Jeet gingerly pulled his hands away from his face, and Isabella gasped again when we saw that there was blood trickling down from both of his nostrils. Suddenly, that trickle transformed into a torrent, and Baljeet yelped as he tried in vain to stop it.

Isabella shrieked at Phineas and Ferb to go get their parents while I just stood there staring at my nerd. That was a lot of blood coming out of his nose. I mean, don't get me wrong, I've seen blood before, but that amount coming out of my nerd's nose…it just seemed like a ton, and it honestly scared me (as much as I hate to admit it).

I felt solid ground touch my feet, and I realized Ferb had deactivated the antigravity. 'Jeet also hardly noticed, slinking down to a sitting position, blood still pouring out of his nasal passages. I thought I heard Isabella yelling something at me, but I really couldn't concentrate while my mind was still trying to process the fact that my nerd was wounded.

I was snapped out of my trance when I felt the sting of a hand making contact with my left cheek. I growled and glowered at Isabella (who was standing in front of me) while rubbing the sore spot where she smacked me.

"What the heck was that for!?" I shouted rather than asking.

"You weren't listening to me! Do you want to help Baljeet or not!?" She replied, seeming equally menacing. Sheesh, if looks could kill…

I growled, and she took that as a "yes". She pointed towards the door of the air hockey arena. "Then go tell Mrs. Flynn Baljeet's Mom's phone number! You're the only one who knows it!"

Without anything else to do, I charged into Phineas and Ferb's house. Mrs. Flynn was standing in the kitchen with the cordless phone in her hands, questioning Ferb and Dinner Bell on whether or not they knew Mrs. Rai's phone number.

I bounded up to her. "I know the number."

"Oh? Alright, Buford. Dial away." Mrs. Flynn replied as she handed me the phone.

I didn't answer, instead focusing on pressing the right buttons on the phone and pressing it to my ear. I was the only one in our little gang (besides 'Jeet, of course) who knew Mr. and Mrs. Rai's numbers by heart, and I had given Baljeet my mom's number back when we had first become frenemies. A bully has to keep in touch with his nerd at all times.

Finally, I heard someone pick up. A woman with an Indian accent answered. "Hello?"

"Hey, Mrs. Rai." I sounded a heck of a lot calmer than I felt. "'Jeet had an accident, and now his nose won't stop bleeding. Can ya come over and pick him up? We're at Phineas and Ferb's house."

"Oh sure, Buford! I will be there before you know it!"

I hung up. Phineas, Ferb, and I all looked over at the patio door when we heard it slide open. Isabella and my nerd entered the house, and this time 'Jeet had a small rag pressed to his nose.

Dinner Bell frowned a little bit in concern and inquired, "Has it stopped bleeding yet?"

Isabella replied for Baljeet. "No," She looked back out the patio door. "Luckily there were some old rags near the air hockey rink, so Baljeet could- hey, where is the air hockey rink?"

We all followed Isabella's gaze outside. She was right. No rink. I glanced back over to Mrs. Flynn, who was getting a clean rag out of the cabinet for Baljeet. She apparently hadn't noticed the huge iron dome that had been in her backyard just minutes ago. And, cue big sister…

"MOM!" An obnoxious, loud voice came from the gate outside. No prizes for the person who figures out who it was.

"Candace, wait a few seconds! I have something important to take care of here!" Mrs. Flynn replied as she stood up and hurried over to Baljeet. She offered him the clean old rag, which the nerd gratefully accepted and switched it out with his bloody one. His nose still didn't let up.

The doorbell rang, and Mrs. Flynn stated, "Oh, that must be Mrs. Rai. Come on, Baljeet. We need to fix that nose." She was trying to sound calm, obviously so not to alarm 'Jeet.

The Indian geek trotted after her, the rag still held to his nasal passages. I decided to go after them and make sure 'Jeet was going to be okay. Mrs. Flynn opened the door and Baljeet went out to join his mom. I stopped at the doorway and watched Mrs. Rai hurry Baljeet towards her red Nissan.

As my nerd climbed into the car, I called, "Hey, nerd!" He paused for a split second to aknowledge me. "You better be okay, or else! Got it?"

Baljeet just grinned despite the rag in his way and flashed me a thumbs up. Then his mom pulled out of the driveway and rushed off to the ER.

Once their car vanished in the distance, Mrs. Flynn patted my back and reassured, "Don't worry, Buford. Baljeet'll be fine."

I didn't reply, and instead announced I was going home and walked off towards my house. I folded my arms and grumbled to no one particular as I went along. Meanwhile all I could think was 'that geek better be okay!'

Whoa. Well, here's the rewritten first chapter as fashionably late as it could possibly get. '^^ Yikes, I'm so sorry…Hopefully I'll get my act together and get over this monstrous writer's block! :/