IllStandByYou

TITLE - I'll Stand By You
AUTHOR - Tammy M. Parnell
EMAIL ADDRESS: LaLapine@aol.com
DISTRIBUTION STATEMENT: Anywhere, as long as my name & disclaimer are on it
SPOILER WARNING: Memento Mori
RATING: PG
CLASSIFICATION: S, A
KEYWORDS: Friendshippy
SUMMARY: Only Scully can comfort Mulder after his vivid nightmare
DISCLAIMER: The are not mine. They belong to Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, Fox Television, and the very talented actors who portray them. The Pretenders' song I'll Stand By You is used without permission; no infringement intended, yadda yadda yadda.


I'll Stand By You
by Tammy M. Parnell

Oh, why you look so sad?
The tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now
Well, don't be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
Cause I've seen the dark side, too
When the night falls on you
You don't know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less
I'll stand by you

***

His heart beat as that of someone who had just run a marathon, fast and frenzied, pulse racing. Fox Mulder sat up quickly, gulping the air in his tiny motel room, hand to his chest as sweat dripped from his face.

Nightmares were no stranger to him, certainly. But never had they seemed quite so vivid as this latest trial. For once, it wasn't about his sister; no painful regurgitated past event to haunt him tonight. It was one from the future which dogged at his soul, chilled him to the bone, and instilled him with an uncharacteristic panic. Suddenly he knew he had to see her, make sure she was okay, before he could ever hope for sleep to come again.

Quietly, he opened the door which divided his room from that of his partner. He approached the bed with a pounding heart and suspended breathing. A glance at her peaceful form elicited a thankful exhale, though only slightly quieted his steady pulse. She was okay. For now.

He gave in to the urge to seat himself at the edge of her mattress, watching her slumber. A person would never know by looking at her that a cancerous tumor was slowly eating away at her, that she was dying. But he knew. And he was terrified.

Memories mixed with an overwhelming feeling of impending loss brought tears to his eyes, a steady trickle running down his cheek as an autumn creek. His life had shown him many tragedies, but aside from the abduction of his sister when he was just a boy, this living nightmare was by far the worst thing he had ever had to face. He feared he wouldn't be able to give her the support she so desperately needed--wouldn't be able to face their most dangerous enemy and, worst of all, wouldn't be able to accept the inevitable.

As if of its own accord, Mulder's hand shakily reached out to a strand of auburn hair cascading over his partner's cheek. Gently, he smoothed it behind her ear, eliciting a small sigh from the sleeping figure. Perhaps she could sense that something wasn't quite right, as her eyes fluttered open then to find Mulder's tear-streaked face watching her intently.

Mulder, what's wrong? she asked quickly as she sat up to face him, a hand going out to wipe away a few fresh tears.

A lump in his throat prevented speech, so he merely shook his head and reached out for her, allowing the tears to flow faster.

Her arms instinctively wrapped tightly around her partner, her best friend. She held him closely against her, concern overpowering her as sobs wracked his trembling body. She gently stroked his hair and soothed him with her soft voice, her mothering instinct in full force. Though she had no clue what had happened, she knew only that she had to fiercely protect him from this latest pain as her own heart ached for his suffering.

***

So, if you're mad get mad
Don't hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
And hey, what you got to hide?
I get angry, too
Well, I'm a lot like you
When you're standing at the crossroads
Don't know which path to choose
Let me come along
Cause even if you're wrong
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you

***
The faint rays of early morning peeked through the curtains to fall across the bedspread of Dana's motel room. A distant chirping outside the window signaled the world was awakening, though she had been awake for a countless amount of time. Lying on her left side, her head was propped up by a hand as her elbow rested on the pillow. A few inches away, her partner slept on his right side, signs of dried tears on his somewhat relaxed features. Dana's free hand absently stroked his hair in reassurance, concern still evident on her tired face.

He shifted slightly in his haze of awakening and sighed almost peacefully before opening his eyes. Dana stopped smoothing his hair as her hand reached out to clasp his.

You okay, Mulder? she asked gently.

He didn't answer right away, simply looking at her with uncertain eyes. She squeezed his hand again, and they simultaneously moved to sitting positions, never breaking contact.

I'm scared, Dana, he admitted quietly.

Dana, she repeated silently as her heart skipped a beat. Aloud she questioned, Did you have a nightmare?

He nodded, unsure how to explain.

she prodded gently.

He shook his head this time, still hesitant to discuss the events of his dream.

Somehow she had known it wasn't just about Sam. She had sensed it was something much more personal.

she hazarded to guess as she unconsciously held a breath.

His voice was silent, though his eyes spoke volumes.

Oh, Mulder, she replied tenderly, her own heart feeling heavy. They simply looked at each other, words insufficient for the feelings they were experiencing. Dana felt a lump begin to form in her own throat as she reached her arms to wrap snugly around his middle, needing his strength as much as he needed hers.

Mulder returned the gesture, his arms holding her closely against him.

We will get through this, Mulder stated firmly, a renewed hope beginning to stir within him.

Dana agreed in a shaky voice, enjoying the comfort of their all-too-rare embrace. We'll get through it together.


***

And when
When the night falls on you, baby
You're feeling all alone
You won't be on your own
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you

THE END