She awoke to the sound of the buzzing of her phone vibrating against the bedside table. Her eyes frayed open and she glanced over to see her phone fall to the floor.
She knew who it was before her fingers found it, knew she was just going to hang up anyway. Her fingertips found her phone and she squinted as the flashing light lit up a far too familiar name.
She flipped it open, waited to hear his voice which would make her hang up. Her thumb hovered over the button to cancel the call. She had no idea what it was about his voice that made her shudder, that made her want to get as far away from him as possible.
Maybe it was the rough, scratchy sound of his voice, the voice that made him sound dangerous and unstable. His voice was finally heard, the familiar feeling came to her, she felt a pang of pity and guilt go through her as she flipped the phone closed and placed it back on the table.
He'd gone downhill ever since they got off that island. She went from loving him, to despising him, to pitying him. Giving him that tiny ounce of happiness if she just picked up the phone, just to hear her breathing.
"Turn it off," James' voice was muffled through the pillows. "Turn it off, or when he calls again, I'll throw it out the window."
She did so; she couldn't take another call from Jack either. James deserved it, he had coped with the calls, let her take them, let her meet him. But she saw it in his eyes that it was breaking him, slowly, every call from Jack was a step further away from James.
They used to argue a lot, about him, about Jack. Kate couldn't help seeing him, she couldn't let Jack fall apart, but she couldn't let James fall apart either.
She loved James and had fallen out of love with Jack. She had loved both men when she was on the island; she loved them both for completely different reasons. Both of the men giving her reasons to love them more everyday.
But what she couldn't explain is how she chose. How she suddenly fell out of love with Jack. As soon as her feet touched the concrete she felt something, something indescribable.
Maybe it was fear, fear of the unknown. She had no idea what would happen to her, she was a fugitive and after the media got hold of this the police would find her in seconds.
Memories of the day she parted with the other survivors came flooding back.
She said her goodbyes to everyone. Jokes were made, laughs were heard, and tears were shed. Jacks smile found her eyes and she met him in a strong embrace, they parted slowly, not knowing what this meant, what the future would hold.
She turned from Jack for her eyes to meet James', she still got that amazing feeling when their eyes met each other. They smiled and found themselves moving forwards, their bodies met and arms wrapped around one another.
She went up on her tip toes to wrap her arms around his neck, let her fingers sprawl out on his back and rested her chin on his shoulder. She could feel herself nearly being lifted off the floor as James' arms made their way around her waist and his embrace tightened on her. Their eyes closed.
The embrace of two people in love.
Two people who never wanted to let go.
Two people who wanted to cherish this moment.
To make it last forever.
She was waiting for his hold to slacken; he was waiting for hers to do the same. In fact, it did the exact opposite, simultaneously both of their grasps on each other tightened, they smiled.
They finally parted and their eyes met, she suddenly felt both of his hands framing her face, suddenly felt his lips on hers.
Her breath caught her throat; the feelings of his lips on hers were immense. His tongue traced her lips. She kissed him back and their tongues met.
Everything went into a blur.
Nobody else mattered.
Nobody else was there.
Only them, two people, in this moment.
The kiss seemed to go on forever, their lips finally parted and their foreheads rested on each others.
He saw her lips curve into a smile, saw it get wider as she met her eyes with his.
"Come with me." He whispered.
He saw her swallow, could feel the dryness suddenly form in her throat, saw the flicker of fear flash across her eyes.
"Come with me, freckles. I won't let anyone hurt you, I'll protect you."
His hands framed her face again, bringing her eyes to meet his.
"I love you."
His voice seemed to stop time, everything was moving in slow motion.
She knew now.
Who she wanted.
Who she loved.
She looked at him, looked right into his steal blue eyes.
"I love you too."
They both smiled and their lips met briefly. He broke off, took her hand and brought her back with him.
Everything was fine until Jack found her number and called her every hour of the day. He slowly began to break them, to ruin their relationship. Maybe that was his intention, to break them up so Kate would come running to him.
His movement on the bed brought her out of her trance and the memories washed away.
But sudden memories of their fights came surging back to her.
"Well? Go on, run along to the Doc." James said as she hung up the phone. "Lord knows you wouldn't want to make him wait for what you're giving him."
"It is not like that." She insisted.
James always thought that her and Jack were sleeping together every time they met. Couldn't get it off his mind.
"It's not?" He laughed maliciously.
"I'm worried about him, he's changed, he's not who he used to be." She tried.
"Just go." He whispered hoarsely.
"James…" She tried to reach out for him.
He tore her touch away from him, "GO!"
She didn't, instead she stepped closer to him.
He ran his hand through his hair and clenched it into a fist as it fell from his head. "Do you know how much it's killing me for you to leave me for him?" She tried to speak but he didn't let her. "For you to rush to the phone every time it rings?" His breathing was unsteady. "It's breaking me Kate." He tried to collect himself. "I love you…so much…more than he ever could. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"
This time she stepped right up to him and took his face in her heads. "James, listen to me," He didn't look at her. "Look at me," He eyes slowly dragged up to meet hers. "I love you, not him, you. I would never leave you, I love you, James."
She could tell her words meant more than anything in the world to him, but he only let it show for a second. She kissed him; it was brief as he pulled away.
"Go, now." He whispered.
She always left the house crying and she always left Jack crying. She didn't love Jack anymore and the fact that he was breaking her and James apart was too much for her.
That's when she stopped meeting him.
He called her phone so much that James eventually threw it against the wall, making it shatter into pieces. She made no protest, she'd wanted to do that but felt too guilty. Glad that James was feeling what she was.
Jack somehow got hold of her new number, this time not calling her as much. She would sometimes pick up the phone, she wouldn't speak, just listen. Sometimes the call would last for hours, sometimes just mere seconds.
The calls began shorter and shorter as she soon became scared of him. She was an obsession to him.
James swung his legs from the bed to touch the soft, plush carpet. He felt her roll over to face him.
"Do you miss him?" He suddenly said.
She knew who he meant, who else could he mean?
"No." She said simply.
"Why not?"
"Because he's not Jack anymore."
That was true; she would miss him if he was the same. She missed him a lot before he started calling. Now he'd changed, there was nothing about him that was Jack anymore. Nothing that made her smile, or laugh, or blush. Nothing at all that reminded her of the real Jack.
"So you would miss him if he stayed the same?" He asked, still with his back to her.
"Of course, just like I miss everyone from the island. He was my friend, James."
"A friend you loved." He responded coldly.
Every time Jack called he acted like this, brought Jack up and asked questions.
She hated Jack for what he had done to their relationship.
"Not like how I love you." She answered calmly, sitting up.
"You sure about that?" He asked spitefully.
She slid over to him, "I'm positive. I love you James."
She placed her hands on his shoulders, could feel him coming back.
"If I stopped answering the calls, would you stop being like this? Would you love me?" She asked.
He smiled bitterly, "I do love you, never stopped. It's just him. He's ruining this." He lay back down on the bed, let her nestle into his chest and play with his fingers.
She knew he was right. "So if I stopped the calls, threw my phone away, you would come back to me? Take down those walls that you've built so expertly against me?"
She felt him nod, "Yeah." His voice was hoarse.
"Okay."
He felt her leave his chest and watched her pick her phone up from the bedside table.
He propped himself up on one elbow, "What're you doin'?"
She didn't say anything.
He watched her and she took the phone apart, piece by piece.
After she had finished she laid each part out in a line beside each other on the table and returned to lie back on his chest.
He kissed her forehead, "Thank you."
For the first time in months they both succumbed into a peaceful sleep together.