The light of day
Sanzo didn't want to do it. He had put it off for four weeks, but Hakkai was right, it had to be done. And so, with a heavy heart, Sanzo began to clean out Goku's things.
It hurt him to go through the dead monkey's things, but if he didn't do it, the others would have to. Part of him was all right with that idea. Let the others take care of it; it'd be less painful that way. But the other part of him felt that it was his duty to Goku. He had, after all, died to save him.
And so, Sanzo was cleaning Goku's room. It was painful, and Sanzo couldn't stop the tears when he found a photograph.
I found a photograph of you and me
Drinking sangria somewhere by the sea
There's laughter in out eyes
And dreams in out hearts
Before life weighed it inAnd tore it all apart
It was a group photo, taken somewhere near a large body of water. Goku had gotten a local to take it. The monkey was stood behind the other three who were sat around a table. All the food had been eaten and all that was left was the drinks. Sanzo was the only one of the group who wasn't smiling.
When there's no more lies
To hide behind
And no more tears to cry
I know we'll be all right
Coz even though the skies above
Are cold and grey
I'm sure tomorrow
We will see the light of day
Sanzo knew that the pain would always be with him. But he knew that it would get easier to bear as time went on. Sanzo sat on Goku's bed. Clutching the photograph close to his chest, he did something he hadn't done for a very long time, he cried.
After all the tears had come, he continued his task with a heavy heart. He soon came across a box labelled 'Sanzo'. Curiosity made him open it and see what was inside. He soon wished he hadn't.
I found some letters from
A happier time
I smelt the scented pages
And re-read the lines
Why must the summer always
Turn into the fall?
Why must we lose love?
To ever know love at all?
Inside the box were some neatly folded letters. All of them were addressed to him, but he had never received a single one. He opened the top one. It was dated for just two days before the boy had died.
Dear Sanzo
If you are reading these, then I'm either dead, or I finally got the guts to actually give you them. I have tried and tried to tell you, so many times, in so many different ways. It's always hard for me to work up the nerve to tell you. I don't know how you'll react. I don't wanna loose the relationship we have now, but I'm gonna tell ya.
They don't call these things love letters for nothing after all.
Genjyo Sanzo, I, Son Goku, love you. I live to make you happy, I would do anything to work towards that goal.
There, I said…. Uh wrote it.
LOVE from Goku!
Sanzo put the letter down after reading it many times. There were seventeen letters all together. All of them were love letters, addressed to Sanzo and from Goku.
Once again, tears began to fall.
When there's no more lies
To hide behind
And no more tears to cry
I know we'll be all right
Coz even though the skies above
Are cold and grey
I'm sure tomorrow
We will see the light of day
How long had Sanzo been lying to the boy? Every time he had told him that he hated him, it was a lie. Every time he had said that he would kill him, he was lying. All this time, Sanzo had been hiding his true feelings from the monkey king, thinking they were not returned. How mistaken he had been.
"I love you Goku." He said softly to the empty room. He held the photo and the letters close to his heart and looked to the ceiling. "Come back to me, please." He knew how futile the plea was, but it didn't stop him from begging.
His Goku was gone. And he didn't get the chance to tell him how much he loved him. "I am so sorry," He sobbed.
And that was how they found him. Gojyo and Hakkai went looking for Sanzo after he was gone for over three hours. They found him sitting on Goku's bed, begging forgiveness and one last chance.
Goku's death had broken him, and it would be a while before he recovered. But recover he would. He owed that much to Goku.
For his memory, Sanzo would do anything.
End?