A/N- This is dedicated to my sister, Jen. I'm sorry for all the things I had said, and I never meant any of it, I was just, well mad. I know that's no excuse, but if only you knew Jen. I'll tell you someday, I promise, but for now, I hope you respect that I'm not ready to open up yet, not even to you. Trust me, when I want to open up, you'll be the first, Jen. I love you.

Lovey Hart Note: Sorry for all you people reading it, and been waiting for a update, as I promised before school. I guess I broke my promise, just like Rose did.(Broken Promise) I will continue with that, I promise (This time I'll keep that promise) I will... but I hope you can see that I needed to do this, for both my sister, and me.

Sisters Who

Marissa Cooper was in a terrible mood. Plan and simple. Well, maybe not all that simple why she was mad, but she was still mad, furious even. She could barley function right. Her boyfriend Luke Ward, had just written a song, and basically said he loved her. She wasn't ready to love, and if people didn't leave her alone, she might never be able to. That's why she was so mad. Plan and simple.

She sat in her bed room, and stared at the ceiling all day after school. When she was at her father's house, she could resort to counting the cracks in the wall and ceiling, but since she was at her mothers, all she did was stare. What else could she do?

Not long after she gave a long sigh, her mother called her to come out and have supper. After another long sigh, she hulled her thinning small figure down the stairs, to again, pick at her food, and eat nothing. Julie just never got it, never figured out her oldest daughter had a serious problem with her eating ways. Marissa had, countless times told her, she needed help with it, but Julie, being herself, never did listen, and went to ask their new stepfather what he needed, or wanted. Marissa would shake her head, and go find her sister.

Speaking of her sister, she was mad at her too. She didn't know what for, but she just felt the need to hate her family tonight, after what had happened with Luke. She mustered up a hateful glare, and looked at everyone at the table.

"Come Marissa, you must say Grace," Julie said, in a horrible mock way to show her fake kindness. Julie had never liked Marissa, like she favored her younger daughter. I mean, what wasn't to like about Jen? She excelled in both physically and academically, was bright and outgoing all the time, basically the complete opposite of Marissa.

Marissa was just an average student, and sport player. She was dark, and made people not want to be around her, with her negative attitude all the time. Like she had said who wouldn't want to be around Jen, and not her.

Marissa sat down, and her sister offered her hand to hole, in order to say Grace. They had never said it in their old life, and Marissa didn't get why someone as new as her stepfather, should change their old life, even if their father wasn't with them anymore. She glared at her sister, Jen, and wrinkled her nose. "No," she tried to sound strong.

"Marissa, hold her hand, supper is getting cold," Julie said, again in her mock sounding voice, like she actually cared.

"No," what a bitch my mother was, didn't she even notice what kind of pain I was in? "Then come with me," She got up, not bothering to notice where her chair landed after she got up so fast. She came over and gripped my arm painfully, and hulled my small frame up the stairs. I looked back down at the table, with only two people left. For a minute, I was hoping my sister would come to my rescue, but then I remembered why should she? Come to save her older sisters ass, when she'd get hers kicked too? I would save her ass and she knows I would. I was even madder now.

"Marissa! What have I ever done to you? You bitch!" My mother yelled at me outside my bedroom door, in a hushed scream. She hit me. Slapped me right across the face, and even thought it wasn't the first time she had done that, it felt all new again, and it hurt not only the place she hit, but it hurt inside too. She opened my door again, and pushed me in, not so gently. "Don't come out, you're not welcome with us."

She slammed the door in my face, and to think this woman was supposed to love you no matter what, through low and high, some mother she was.

I went and sat on my desk chair, and put my head in my hands. I looked at my desk; it had still had my little sharp pocket knife on it. Of course Jen didn't know about it, or she would come in and take it on me, she just never acts even a little bit depressed.

I grabbed the small sharp knife, without a second thought, opened it, and put it to my skin. I pushed really hard, making the sharp thin blade cut even deeper. I smirked. I liked this.

Knock knock … knock knock.

It was Jen's signature knock, two fast knocks, then a small pause, then two small knocks again. Something I defiantly did not want to hear tat the moment. Fuck! Shit…. Oh shit. She could like eat me alive when I cut myself. I looked around the room for a sweater, something, anything to cover my bloody arm.

Knock knock … knock knock

"I'm coming! Fuck Jen!" I grabbed the nearest sweater, not exactly looking at it. I opened the door, and her eyes slightly bugged. I glared at her, I remembered that she didn't come to my rescue, helping me with my mother, at least she could fight mom, I was so weak from malnutrition

"Marissa! How many knifes do I need to take from you? Huh? Or am I wasting my fucking time on you?" I wondered how she knew, and I looked down at my sweater covered arm. Great…. a skin tight sweater, could I be anymore obvious? She walked over to the desk and took the blood stained knife from it, and held it in her hand.

"I'm not fucking asking you to protect me! You never even helped me earlier! That just goes to show how much you fucking care about me!" I tried to close my bedroom door, but her small little perfect foot stopped me, and she, having food in her, pushed me out of the way.

"I didn't say you were! But unlike you, I care about what you do to yourself!" Ouch, she had hit a soft spot in me, but of course, me being me, wouldn't let that show.

"At least I'm not a perfect bitch! Like someone I know!"

"Oh? And who would that be now, huh? I suppose you'll blame me for everything that happened down there with mom? It was you who wouldn't hold my fucking hand!"

"No wonder!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Get out!"

"No! My only sister is cutting herself! I'm not leaving until you're better." She was softening, and trying to get to my heart, like only she could. But not tonight.

"Get the fuck out of here! Hey! I'll tell you what, next time when mom flips out on your ass, fight for yourself!"

"So this is what this is about? Me not going after mom?"

"No, I said get the fuck out!"

"Make me."

"Jen, get the fuck out of here! I hate you, and I don't talk to people I hate, so get the fuck out." I had stuck a cord. When we were small, and mom and dad used to fight, saying they hated each other, we had promised to each other, that we would never say the word 'hate' to anyone or each other. And we never had, if it wasn't for my stupidy.

She looked at me, hurt. Her own eyes filling with tears, mine had long over filled. She walked over to my desk, and placed the knife on it. She blinked rapidly, and then walked out in a hurry. I had really hurt her, but I didn't care, everyone hurt me, then why couldn't I hurt someone?

I went back to the desk and picked up the blade, and cut nine more deep gashing cuts. I felt good, but only for awhile. I looked at my arm, and cried even harder then I should have. I had just hurt me one and only sister… the one person I would give the world to, and not think twice about it.

I just put my blood stained white sweater on again, and opened my laptop. I wrote my newest poem, and posted it on my Fanfiction profile, I didn't know what else to do, but write. The poem just seemed to come from nowhere, and it flowed so easily.

Sister Who

Sisters who yell and fight,
Sisters who when get along, give the monsters a fright.

Sisters who tease each other from night to daylight,
Sisters who make each others day bright.

Sisters who laugh and play,
Sisters who cry, when the other gets their way.

Sisters who act like blonds,
Sisters who share a special bond.

Sisters who were lucky not to have a brother,
Sisters who will always understand each other.

Sisters who fight and hate, but forgot to act in a sisterly way,
One sister, who regrets what she said to the other sister today.

Not long after I posted the poem, she read it, and sent me an email saying,

That was not something I can just forget, Marissa. We promised…

Of course I realized that when I said it, I just wanted her to hurt like me. But now I realized that was not the way of doing things, and I'm truly sorry. I don't know what else to say… but I didn't mean it… I love you, and I'm sorry.

A/N- I'm sad to say, this is a true story, and it happened not long ago. Jen, my sister, still hasn't forgiven me, and I'm bagging for your forgiveness. Email me, baby, if you'll talk. I'm sorry, and I love you sis.