A/N: I've uploaded this on the blog months ago and just realized I've never posted it here. Please mind the language. I don't own Chuck.

ACT 1 – Scene 3

[Early afternoon. Casey's apartment. Morgan, Casey, Chuck and Sarah are standing in the doorway between the living room and kitchen, drinking coffee. Producer's note: Due to WB getting an early start on breaking down the set, Casey no longer has furniture. We apologize for the inconvenience. *Note to self: borrow mugs from Buy More break room*]

[Everyone sips.]

Morgan: Well, I love it. You know how I feel about bullets, which is to say – negatively. This is fantastic.

Casey: Where do I fit in? What am I? Chief Googler?

Sarah: Well actually you'll be doing a lot of the same stuff you already do.

Chuck: Yeah. I mean we're still gonna need fields ops to recover stolen systems and breaching companies' security to find their weak spots…

Casey: [Grunts]

Morgan: Plus, wouldn't it be lovely not to get shot at?

Chuck: Exactly. Aren't you sick of being shot at?

Sarah: Or getting shot. I mean, you get shot a lot.

Casey: Not considering how much I get shot at.

Chuck: [Agreeably] Hmm

Sarah: [Agreeably] Hmm

[Everyone sips.]

Morgan: Okay, think about Alex. Do you know how happy she will be knowing you're not out there doing scary stuff?

Casey: [Considers. Grunts] All right, I'll think about it. But one thing's for sure, if we go through with this, no more Buy More. We don't need a cover. Let's kick the creepy cousin out of the family.

Morgan: [Pensively] Wow. No more Buy More.

[Everyone sips.]

Chuck: Problem.

Sarah: What?

Chuck: There has to be a final mission. There's always a final mission.

Morgan: Problem. We have three episodes left, plus this one. Final four missions?

Chuck: It doesn't have the same ring to it.

Sarah: Maybe we'll have more sexy times? Or I could have a birthday?

Chuck: Doubtful.

Sarah: [Sighs wistfully] Yeah.

Morgan: So, one final mission at a time. Any ideas?

[Everyone sips.]

Casey: There's time for a kidnap. [Points his mug at Chuck] It's your turn.

Sarah: Great. I get to do the rescuing and again no Emmy nomination for my trouble.

Chuck: Yeah, that was a bummer. I was grateful, though.

Sarah: You're welcome, sweetie.

Casey: Also, don't forget the Walker curse.

Morgan: What's the Walker curse?

Sarah: Every time I try to quit badguyery, the Intersect fucks it up.

Morgan: Oh. Who do you think's gonna upload it this time?

Casey: Don't look at me. I'm getting too old for Kung Fu.

Sarah: [Rolls her eyes] Fine, I'll do it.

Chuck: That would actually be awesome.

Sarah: Not if they make you my handler. According to the CIA protocol we'll have to get a divorce or else you'll be reassigned.

Chuck: Oh. Well that sucks.

Sarah: Yeah. I'll be a single parent.

Chuck: [Confused] I thought the peace sign means 'no'.

Sarah: It does. The little 'flip the bird' means you're screwed.

Chuck: I still think it looks like an arrow.

Sarah: Actually it looks like a tiny…

Chuck: Sarah!

Sarah: I was going to say 'finger'.

Chuck: Sure you were.

Casey: [Grunts] Hey, June, Ward, focus.

Sarah: Sorry. Which version of the Intersect do you think I'll get?

[Everyone sips.]

Chuck: Well, 1.0 was upgraded to 2.0.

Morgan: Which was turned into version Douche.

Casey: And 3.0 is actually in a douche.

Chuck: Omen and all.

Morgan: [To Sarah] Are you gonna color your hair? Frosted tips won't work on the blond.

Sarah: I don't know. [To Chuck] Should I go black again?

Chuck: I don't want to feel like I'm cheating on you. Unless it's with Bo Derek.

Sarah: You want to cheat on me with Bo Derek?

Chuck: She is Bo Derek.

Sarah: Good point. Okay, if you meet Bo Derek, I give you permission to fill her body with rainbows.

Chuck: Thanks, sweetie.

Morgan: You lost the poster, huh?

Sarah: Ewww!

Chuck: [Defensively] I was fifteen.

Morgan: He was twenty-three.

Chuck: [Sighs dreamily] I was.

[Everyone who would've had coffee left had we given you real coffee, sips]

Morgan: [To Casey] Hey, did you remember to put sunscreen on Jeff?