Joey Potter had said a lot of goodbyes in her life. After losing not only her mother, but also her father made her hold on to people, almost as hard as she pushed them away.
She isn't naive enough to think that saying goodbye to Pacey is the hardest goodbye. But that knowledge doesn't make watching him walk away easier any time. After that fight at Prom she isn't sure when the next goodbye is going to be the last one. Then its graduation day and he isn't there when they call his name. The hardest goodbyes are always the ones you don't get to say.
She spends that summer overworking herself. Dawson leaves for California and she kisses him goodbye, except his goodbyes always make her feel like she is ten years old and for the first time she wants to go back. She would give up all her dreams of leaving this town if she could just go back to watching movies with the boys in Dawson's bedroom before rowing back across the creek to her mother and father.
Jen and Grams move to Boston with the help of Jack before he is off with Andy. She gets postcards from all of them during the summer but its weird, being the only one stuck in this town.
She has just worked her fifth day in a row of double shifts and yet she can't sleep. So she goes for a walk to the creek and just watches the stars for a while. Laying at the end of the dock she can almost pretend she is back on True Love. Her and Pacey spent many nights just laying there watching stars. After a few hours she decides to try sleeping again.
She gets four hours till she is woken up by Alex. She lifts him out of his crib, shushing him before her sister or any of the guests wake up. She feeds him with a bottle. Then she is started on breakfast. Heat the griddle, pour pancake batter. Lay out bacon, put in the oven. Drink a cup of coffee. Make more pancakes. Scramble some eggs. The guests are waking up so she puts the food on the table, greeting them with a smile and letting them know to get started on breakfast whenever they are ready.
"You could have woken me." Its Bessie with a grateful smile on her face as she takes Alex from Joey's hip.
"It's okay. I was up. Breakfast is served, I'm gonna grab a shower before everyone gets up. I have a double at the club then I'm gonna stop by Leery's and see if they need any help closing. I might be home late." She is talking fast while getting her shower stuff ready.
"Did you eat?" All motherly concern.
"I'm fine. Got to get going." Bessie is about to argue when Joey shuts the bathroom door in her face. Bodie comes from behind to kiss Alex's head and then kisses Bessie.
"I'm worried about her. She is working to much."
"She is just trying to keep busy." Bodie assured, though he could barely keep the worry from his voice.
"Hey Potter! Party tomorrow night! You in?" It's Drue. Who a few months ago Joey probably would have just ignored. But she finds herself nodding her head to answer him.
"Why not? I have off tomorrow night anyway. Want to give me a ride there? I'm working lunch." She is organizing her apron, sorting paid checks and double checking that everyone she has taken an order from is served.
"Sure. See ya later party girl." He gives her what he probably thinks is an award winning smile before going back to work. Joey wouldn't exactly call them friends, but he is the closest thing she has this summer, and at least he knows how to have a good time and keep her mind off of the past and future every now and then.
She gets off work at 6, pleased to see Drue heading to his car. She grabs her bag and slides in the front seat.
"Eyes on the road." She orders him before changing from her work uniform to a simple t-shirt and a pair of shorts. "Okay done."
Drue glances at her, whistling his approval.
"I just need to stop by my place, then we can meet up with the guys and see what they are doing about alcohol for tonight."
"Sure. I'm in a tequila kind of night." She winks at him, biting her lip in the pout that no one can resist. She doesn't party all that often, but she figures every now and then isn't going to hurt much.
They get to the party at 8 and she is getting looks before she has made it in the door. She realized not long after Dawson and Pacey left that guys were a lot less intimated by her now that she didn't constantly have one of them by her side.
Drue hands her a drink before he pulls her on the dance floor. It's weird to be dancing so closely with someone she would barely consider a friend, but he has a hand on her thigh and she doesn't care all that much. It makes her feel in control to not have messy feelings in every decision.
They do shots of tequila at the kitchen counter while she eyes the vacation boys. One of the good things about living in a coastal town is that every summer new people, mostly teenagers about to go off to college, come to visit. She has kissed a few of them this summer.
The Joey growing up probably would be ashamed of her, but she doesn't give herself enough time to think. Because thinking leads to heartbreak and she has had enough of that for a year.
Even after a summer of drinking and partying whenever she didn't have work it didn't take much to make her drunk. If she was good at one thing it was being a good drunk. She was dancing with a guy she didn't recognize, probably a guy here for the week. Judging from his expensive shoes and attitude she was assuming here on his father's yacht. Just passing through.
"Potter!" Drue called, coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her. The guy she had been dancing with stepped back with his hands up before retreating into the crowd of dancers.
"Hey he was totally interested!" She smacked his chest, though they both started laughing after a minute.
"You are so out of that guys league." She smiled up at him, squinting her eyes back and forth to try to get a clear picture. "That is your problem you know, you need to set you sights higher!" Suddenly she was frowning up at him, and he quickly realized where her mind must have gone.
"I think I'm drunk." She told him in her higher then thou voice. "What time is it anyway?"
"Just past midnight." He told her, steadying her with one hand. He had stayed pretty sober most of the summer, always near by one drunk Joey Potter. The first party they had gone to she had ended up past her happy drunk and well into the crying over Pacey drunk.
"One more drink!" She told him, marching off to the kitchen. She grabbed two shots of the cheap whiskey they guys in there were pouring, leaning to pass him one.
"I'm driving." He reminded her, going to pass the shot to someone else when she downed both the shots. "And I think it is about time we go."
"I don't want to go." She pouted, but followed him when he tugged on her hand. He got her into the car, making sure she was buckled in before starting it up. "Why are you so nice to me?" She was leaning her head on the window, looking up at the stars. He didn't answer, he never did. Truth was he didn't know why. He didn't love her, he barely even liked her most of the time but he knew a hurting soul when he saw one. "Do you think he misses me?" She always ended up asking this question when she was just past drunk.
"Yea. I think he does." Drue Valentine may not know many things about relationships, but what he did know is when you have a girl who loves you like Joey loved Pacey you don't leave her without kicking yourself every day.
"Dawson has talked to him. He told me in his last email. Jen wrote ' he's okay ' on her last postcard like that makes anything better."
"How is Jen?" Okay so Drue may have had a small crush on the blond since they were kids.
"Good I guess. I can tell her you asked next time I talk to her?" She had offered a few times before but he always turned her down.
"Yea, you do that Potter." Then he was turning into her families' b&b. They had mastered the art of sneaking in a drunk Joey without waking any of the guests or her sister. He would get her out of the car and up the stairs then it was up to her. The first time he drove her home after a party she managed to slam his car door and then stumble up the stairs. Bodie had come out to meet them that time, and it is something Drue had been avoiding ever since. "See ya tomorrow." He told her, she just waved her fingers in response, before slipping in the door, closing it softly.