Hey guys! So I haven't updated anything in forever, because I've been taking summer school every day from 8am to 4:30pm since the beginning of July. It's almost over tho, so I'll be able to continue writing then :D.

This story is basically just my way of venting, with a couple little Juvia twists for dramatic effect (the second paragraph is made up, of course). It's a shortened, fast-paced version of something that happened to me recently, and why I've been a little down in past weeks. I suppose one of the reasons I love Juvia so much is because I can relate to her, so I've used her in this fic. That in no way means that I don't like Gruvia anymore! They're still my OTP ;)

Please bear with the depressing ending, I guess I just needed to talk to you guys and this is the only way I know how. This is also unedited and has only been proofread for mistakes like, once, so the actual writing part is terrible. Sorry. Idk. Sorry.

DISCLAIMER: Yeah, I guess. Disclaimer.

Juvia Lockser was the type of girl who didn't hold back. Everyone knew she had been in love with Gray Fullbuster since the day they met; she had never exactly been subtle about the way she shouted declarations of love and tore through the guild during her (occasional) jealous rampages. She was the type of girl who never let anything stand in the way of what she wanted.

So when word got around months later that Gray had finally admitted to just how much he liked her, it was pretty much expected that Juvia would be seen running around screaming at the top of her lungs. (Of course, Lucy did her best to tone down her best friend's public reaction into something that could be better described as a walrus crying.)

The first couple of months are nothing but giggles and flushed cheeks, soft whispers and ankles tangled discreetly beneath the library tables. But he's Gray Fullbuster, and he's never been good at showing affection. When he goes for it, you can bet he's not going to hold back. Gentle touches turn into something more demanding, and there are no more boundaries between the safety of comfortable and the fear of going too far.

It starts on the day Gray comes over to watch a movie. Naturally, Gajeel and Levy are invited, and a heated argument breaks out among the two guys before they finally settle on The Book of Life. Ten minutes into the movie, Gray's hand begins to slide from her waist down to her hip, then down to her thigh, and finally shifts back up to squeeze her butt. Thinking he's only being playful, Juvia rolls her eyes and shakes her head with a smile. This isn't the first time he's done it, and she doesn't really care, so she leaves him be. It's only when his other hand sneaks under the hem of her shirt that she begins to feel uncomfortable. She pushes his wrist back down and shifts away from him slightly, hoping he'll notice and take the hint. Unfortunately, he either hasn't or doesn't care, and his hand is back under her shirt and moving up, up, up in a matter of seconds.

And she lets it happen. She sits there and takes it, because she doesn't want to cause a scene or "make him uncomfortable". But she can't help wishing that he'd be just a little bit more like Gajeel.

Because no matter how boorish and gruff he can be, there is not a single person in the entire guild that doubts the fact that Gajeel is a good boyfriend. He might come off as cold and uncaring, but it's impossible to deny the way his eyes light up whenever Levy's in the room with him; how he laughs just a little bit louder and a little bit more fondly when she's around.

The same cannot be said for Gray. Sure, he calls her beautiful and tells her he loves her; holds her hand and is sweet in all the ways he should be. But his words seem empty to her; his mouth tracing static templates in the air, trying too hard to create something that always, somehow, falls flat.

So she avoids him. Juvia begins to avoid Gray like the black plague. She practically lives in the sanctuary of Gajeel's workshop; especially since Levy's moved in with him (it was only a matter of time). After all, the two of them (plus Lucy, of course) are her favorite people on the whole world. And when anyone brings up the man-who-shall-not-be-named, Juvia's only response is to change the topic and try to distract her friends as fast as she possibly can.

Because she doesn't want to think about it. She doesn't want to listen to the little voice inside her head that tells her she did it again. After all, this isn't the first time she's gone after someone thinking she loved them, only to realize she had plunged in without thinking it through.

Juvia's never really understood the concept of "look before you leap".

It isn't until a month later until she realizes just how bad things have gotten. She can't remember the last time she texted him, hasn't seen him since he left (and then came back) from his mission almost 3 weeks before. And she isn't quite sure what to do. He continues to send her a message every few days, but whenever she makes an effort try and talk to him, the conversation is stiff and awkward.

She complains to Lucy about it one day when she comes over, and she goes on and on about how much she wishes he'd just get it when, all of a sudden, she stops mid sentence.

"I mean, how hard is it to understand that I don't always want your hand up my shirt? Like, unless your mouth is attached to mine, don't! Honestly, it's like he doesn't even respect—" The thought hits her like a brick wall. He doesn't respect me. The only thing he's interested in is my butt. Which means he doesn't really like me. He doesn't like me.

She isn't sure whether to burst into tears or start laughing in absolute relief. And when she relays her findings to Lucy, she isn't rewarded with the huge, outraged scream of shock she expects. Instead, her best friend only gives a sad smile and a quiet, "Finally."

Because Lucy is Lucy, and of course, she's known all along. Of course, that's why she'd tried convince Juvia not to keep chasing him all those weeks ago. Of course, she'd never mentioned it after because she wasn't sure if Juvia would be hurt.

The two of them sit in silence for a long time.

Vmmpphh

Vmmpphh

Vmmpp—

"Hello?"

"Hi, Gray."

"Hey, Juvia! I—"

"Gray?"

"Yeah?"

"Listen, I need to talk to you."

She shouldn't feel bad. Juvia feels lighter than she has in weeks, and there is absolutely no reason she should care about ridding herself of someone who has never treated her right. But she can't help the tears that prick the back of her closed eyelids and slip down her already-soaked cheeks.

Her muffled sobs smother themselves in her pillow, and she hides her puffy eyes behind a layer of concealer for the rest of the week.

Lotsa love,

The girl who doesn't really deserve you