Please Wake Me Up
Rating: PG-13
Category: General (although you call it drama)



Idiot. Slob, pig, skintube, dumbass.

I know I'm all those things. No one really needs to tell me. And that's not why. It's not why I'm lying here right now, writing this before I down these pills. Not at all. I'm not doing this because no one cares about me. All my friends care about me. Bender, Professor, Amy, Hermes, even Zoidberg. And...Leela. They all care about me, I know that. I hate to think about it now, what my life would have been like if I hadn't fallen into that pod. Right where I am now, probably. But worse. There wouldn't be anyone to care about my death. I'm already regretting this, but I'm gonna go through with it.
I shouldn't have gotten rid of those worms. They were the best thing that happened to me. And the worst, I guess. You know, everyone thinks I'm a total idiot. That's not really true at all. I've always acted up, pretended to be oblivious to it all. Why? I don't really know. I like it better that way, I think. There's all these hassles to be smart, strong and...perfect. I never wanted to be perfect, I knew that even when I was a little kid. When I got those IQ tests. My IQ is 176. I'm a genius. I don't want that, because I'm not that. I'm just Fry. And that's why I'm doing this.
I had to know, I would have gone insane not knowing. That's part of love. If the other person doesn't love who you are, you shouldn't try to be someone else. That's like...corrupting it all. I had to find out. But she didn't love me. What I turned into, she did love. I could have kept that act up, but it would have been wrong. It'd be like lying to myself, and to her.
"Kill all humans. Must kill all humans..." Bender's voice creaks out from the main apartment. Well, here's one less for you to worry about, old buddy, I think as I swallow the whole bottle, washing it down with a long drink.
Man, things are already getting black. I toss the bottle into my shelf so no one will find it. I climb into my bed, and close my eyes as millions of names and thoughts flash across my mind. Zapp Brannigan is one of them.
Zapp! Of all people, why did you go back to him, Leela? You already knew what a stupid asshole he was. What a stupid jerk...like I am. If I hadn't gotten rid of those damn worms! For once, maybe you would have had a nice boyfriend. I'm sorry. But...I didn't want to lie. That Fry wasn't the real me. I needed to know if you loved me. Keeping those goddamn worms would have made me like all other bastards. It would have made me like Zapp. or that shape-shifter. Like that. I didn't want you to have to put up with that again.

I also thought I could handle it if you didn't love me.

I was wrong about that. Last week, for all of last week it was fine. If I felt my resolve cracking, I just put on that front of mine. The Selfish Idiot in a Skinbag front. I would cope in time. Wrong! You started going on and on about what a great guy Zapp had become, I tired telling you he was the same. That he was cheating on you with Morgan. I don't blame you for thinking I was jealous. I was. I wasn't lying, though! I guess it doesn't really matter now. That's the main reason. I didn't want to wake up tomorrow and find you crying over that asshole, then running off to another one. I didn't want to wake up to another day with you not even talking to me, or even looking at me.
"I love you." I wish I hadn't said that. Then I could take it all back. But, I can't.

Bender just got up. He's opening the door, and walking into my room. Please wake me up, Bender. Please wake me up. I start pleading desperately. But not out loud. Bender's walking out of my room now. He's closing the door. Reason number three I'm glad I won't have to wake up tomorrow. I won't get to see Bender find me dead. Dead. I will be dead in around three minutes now.

Philip J. Fry, age 23, committed suicide last night in his apartment at 1:30 AM by a drug overdose. That's what the obituaries are gonna read tomorrow.

-------------~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~-------------

Bender sat by Fry's bed, waiting for the cornier to come. To pick up Fry, his now dead best friend. Dead...he was gone. Never coming back. "Stupid skintube..." Bender said to himself.
The phone rang. That's right, the professor and everyone would want to know why they were late.

Riing. Riing! Rrrrrriiiiiiiinnnnnggggg Rrrrriiiiinnnnnngggg!

Bender reached over and picked up the phone only to hear Leela screaming at him.

"Why the hell are you two lazy slobs not at work?!" she yelled at him through the receiver. Bender could feel himself getting worked into a rage. It was Leela's fault Fry had killed himself! And now she had the audacity to rage about how he wasn't at work?

"I'll have you know that Fry and I are not going to work today because Fry is dead! Yeah, that's right, dead! All because of you, you one eyed bitch! So don't you dare go ask why we aren't at work today, because I QUIT!!!"
Bender was met with total silence for a moment.

"...dead?" he heard her voice barely whisper.
Click. She had hung up.

Bender didn't hear the bitter crying that followed.




















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