Once upon a time, there was a far away land. It was a land of candy-corn and single-letter names, a land of magic and wonder. And in this land lived many people. Among these people were A and B, who were most definitely alive, though sometimes everyone wanted to kill them. Like Mello, when B ate the last of the Kit-Kats, which was quite often because B enjoyed tormenting Mello by eating the last Kit-Kat and replacing the actual candy bar with cardboard before putting the sealed up wrapper back. On frequent occasion, Mello got B back by emptying his jam jars into the yard. This attracted ants, but B was unfazed. So Mello flushed the next bunch down the toilet.
This caused a terrible backup and flooded the bathroom, and both Mello and B were locked in their rooms for a week. A passed the time with staring at walls. He was always odd. This wall had lickable wallpaper, but A was germaphobic, so he had to Purell-cleanse the wall first. It didn't taste too good, as one might imagine. In fact, it made A sick.
By this point, B was released from his room, and was allowed to continue wreaking havoc. However, instead of havoc, he made rather bland and watery instant Ramen for A while he recovered. A was unimpressed, but didn't say anything, as there was nothing else to eat. Mello ruined all but the Ramen yesterday. Somehow, he thought he could make a cake, but instead caused the kitchen to almost explode. Mello failed at cooking by the book. It didn't hurt that he forgot he put in in the oven..for seven hours. Such a lovely inferno, he and B agreed. What a pity the sprinklers went off.
After the flame incident, Mellow as back to being locked in his room with a record player that endlessly played The Sound of Music. Basically, this resulted in Mello smashing it against a wall. B taunted him by singing in falsetto, so Mello tried to beat him up from inside the room. The agonized screams from the chocaholic were more from withdrawal than Julie Andrews, and thus prompted people sneaking chocolate into Mello's room, for fear he'd kill them when he was released.
Matt was the most frequent visitor, often bringing Cadbury. Unlocking the door was simple, but being dragged in by the shirt was always startling. Entering the room made him realize that Mello was partly insane. Who else would have a closet full of leather and crop-tops? You know, besides Madonna and Lady Gaga and those types. It seemed Mello was channeling his inner Havok(1), but, don't tell him that, he might kill you. With impractical objects. He once attempted to beat someone with a pencil. He didn't have a gun, yet. He was barely allowed to have a safety pin at this point. Another time, he slaughtered a town of LEGO people with a magnifying glass. He was forced to buy Near a new set and apologize with his own pocket money. That money had been saved for a trip to Hershey Park but no, LEGOS! So he locked Near in a closet, and A and B in a fun box with a Twister mat. He said that Julie Andrews commanded it.
THE END.
(1) Havok, as in Davey Havok? Look him up...especially during the Decemberunderground (2006) era.