A/N: So this started as a fic to those who thought Homura went insane at the end of Rebellion, and then it kinda developed from there. Not sure if it turned out exactly how I wanted, but it seems good enough. I regret nothing.
"Somebody" is copyrighted/trademarked/owned by the Eagles 2007, 'Long Road out of Eden'
You feel bad, but not bad enough
You know you had it coming 'cause you played so rough
Back over your shoulder got an icy chill
Man, you thought you'd get away with it
Now you know you never will
Homura Akemi oversaw her dominion with a fair and benevolent hand. It was a world she had made, with a single purpose, and she watched over it with all the determination and emotion in it.
Everything was as good as she could reasonably make it. Mami was no longer lonely, Sayaka wasn't pining over some unreturned crush, and she and Kyoko were happy together as well (Though it'd be hard to tell by appearance sometimes). And best of all, Madoka was here, human once more, and happy.
Not to say that her world was perfect. The Wraith still appeared to threaten things, and she had settled into a somewhat one sided antagonistic relationship with Sayaka, who seemed to retain some suspicion of what had happened in spite of the memory wipe she had been subject to. Homura didn't particularly care, but the blunette kept pursing it.
That was hardly a concern of hers though, more an amusement than anything, and she didn't let it distract her from important affairs. She enjoyed her world and rested in the fruit of her labour. This was the way it was, the way it should be, and she would not allow it to change. After all she had suffered, didn't she deserve a little happiness too?
Even now she sat at her claimed table in the park, watching the world pass her by as she relaxed. Across the way, she could see her 'friends' go about their day in peaceful ignorance, without the worry of fighting, wishes, curses, or the fear of death. This was truly the best of the three worlds she had seen.
Sayaka and Kyoko were arguing, as they tended to do, and Homura smirked at the sight of it. It only brought back memories of times gone by, pulling her to the distant past. Even in this world of hers, some things never changed.
The hair on the back of her neck rose before a flash of pink flared in the corner of her vision, and she frowned, glancing over to look at the girl who had drawn her attention, while at the same time chastising herself. How had she gotten so distracted as to let Madoka sneak up on her like that? But where she looked, there was no one.
The frown deepened, and her head swung about to only confirm that no one was near her at the moment. She considered the occurrence odd, but dismissed it, and turned her attention back to her charges. It was nothing to worry about, and she had concerns of her own.
Somebody, somebody
You got a feelin' somebody's following you
Homura Akemi walked down the street, ignoring the taunts of the familiars that only she could hear over people's conversations, the same familiars that helped her maintain this facade she had set up. Ahead of her walked a clustered group in school uniform, the same one she wore when she played pretend. Sayaka, Kyoko, Mami, Nagisa, and her beloved Madoka, all still blissfully unaware of the nature of their reality. A state of affairs she would like to keep as long as possible.
There was only one disturbance to that order, and that was the feeling that she was being watched. She could sense the eyes upon her, and flashes of that familiar pink in the corner of her vision persisted, even if she never saw anything. She knew it wasn't Madoka related though. She'd made very sure of that.
So she ignored the small things to focus on the larger picture and watch from afar. She had no desire to approach them and disturb what they had. She was a different from them, and had no right to stand with them.
She wove through the walking people, an elusive shadow, and nonexistent in their eyes. No, she got all the happiness she needed from seeing them happy. And this was shown with a small smile as Mami attempted to keep the irascible redhead and blunette under control.
Still, it seemed she was not as invisible as she thought, for Madoka (of course Madoka) turned around and spotted her, a smile light up her face, expressed emotion that made the devil's heart flutter in her chest.
"Hello Homura-chan," Madoka called as she turned about and moved towards the raven haired girl, waving at the same time.
Homura turned to leave then, aware that her encounters with Madoka always risked triggering a reawakening of her powers. Not that she avoided Madoka entirely, given the respective roles she had given them both that necessitated interaction, but but she wanted their meetings to be on her terms, not random.
Yet when she turned to leave, she could swear she saw another Madoka out of the corner of her eye. Not her Madoka, but the other one. The one she had sealed away seemingly a lifetime ago.
She frowned in displeasure and slight disbelief, but just as she was able to center her gaze, she found the image gone. There one instant, gone the next, a split second that made her wonder if it had actually been there.
Madoka came to a stop in front of her, her head slightly tilted and wearing a concerned expression. "Homura-chan, are you alright?"
Confronted as she was, Homura dismissed the unexplained to give a small smile to the other girl. "Thank you Madoka, but I'm fine. I just remembered that I have some things to attend to."
"Oh, alright." Madoka seemed a little let down by this, but Homura knew she would accept it, as she usually did with this sort of thing. "See you tomorrow then." With a bow, she ran ahead to rejoin the group, which was currently engrossed in discussing what to do next.
Homura watched her go with a bit of amusement before she turned around, a frown taking over once more as she walked away from them. Space and time warped around her as she went on a little trip to another part of her domain, in her pursuit of answers. Perhaps the Incubators were responsible...
No one knows 'bout the times you had
You've been so evil; you know, you've been so bad
One visit later, and she knew the Incubators weren't at fault for this. They may not have enjoyed the state of affairs she had put into place, but they didn't have the ability to directly affect her, much less pose a threat to her. And she wouldn't be getting tricked or manipulated by them ever again.
And yet the occurrences hadn't stopped. Days, weeks rolled by, and it continued to happen with increasing frequency. She saw her face in crowds, on street corners, but only glimpses, instances, gone as soon as she recognized them.
But she refused to let that bother her. The status quo would be maintained, order kept, her realm preserved. She had put up with so much to this point, she could bear anything for the sake of Madoka's happiness.
At the moment she was standing outside Mami's apartment, where the sound of merriment could reach her ears. Her heart pined to be up there with them, laughing, smiling, but she refrained. They were happy now, and she knew her presence would ruin the mood, at least for some of them. So let them be happy then. She had all she needed, and even if it consigned her to being merely an observer, she would be content.
Fortunately, godly powers had their perks, and as a result her location was no obstacle to seeing what happened. It allowed her to hear the combined compliments and cheers as Mami produced a delicious carrot cake from the kitchen, a scene which she could visualize with her mind's eye.
Homura smiled softly, a near smirk at some joke only she knew the punchline to. It was something simple, normal, but after years of fighting, she had learned to take pleasure in the simple things.
And just as the emotion was there, it vanished. There, at the base of the metal stairs, was Her. The other Madoka, the one Homura refused to recognize as such. After all, She wasn't her Madoka, but some twisted form of the friend she cared so much about. She wore the sad look Homura had seen Her wearing every other time, and old habits reasserted themselves as the Devil settled into bemused ambivalence.
It was different this time though. A double check, and She was still there, whereas She would have vanished before. What had changed? Nothing visibly, but something must have to cause this alteration in routine.
Still, she wasn't going to let this opportunity pass her by. Not when she had a chance for results. She wanted answers, and she would get them, one way or another. The world shifted into monochrome shades of gray as she froze time with a thought, and stepped forward.
The forward foot hit the ground, and She vanished, like She had never been there. Eyes widened in surprise and Homura leapt forward to where She had been standing, looking about almost wildly for any sight of Her. But She was gone, and there was no sign of where.
Time remained paused as she took a deep breath, confusion brought to rein with restored calm composure. Whatever had happened, she would not be shaken by it. There had been no threat, no attempt against her, and though she was confused, she would not panic. She couldn't afford to be.
She returned the flow of reality to normal and spun about on her heels, ignoring the taunts of disloyal familiars as wings spread from her back. With effortless motions she powered into the sky and flew away to destroy any Wraith she could find. That would get her head back in the game, and then hopefully this problem would vanish.
There's a devil to pay for what you put them through
And you got a feeling somebody's following you
She. She wasn't going away. Everywhere Homura went, no matter what she did, She would be there. With increasing frequency she saw Her, Her face, Her sadness. There was no escape, like she was being haunted by a persistent ghost of the past.
It was driving her to distraction, this repetitive vision, and the judgment on Her face each time she saw Her. Where was She coming from? It wasn't the Incubators, it couldn't be Madoka, and it wasn't the Wraith, so what was causing it?
She was no closer to answers than she had been before, and that frustrated her. Even with her powers, her control, she still couldn't confront Her. She'd vanish every time she tried. And that made it all the more worrisome.
She knew she wasn't insane, knew she only saw Her because she was above the rest of the people of her world, so they couldn't see Her nor help out with this problem even if she had been willing to confide in them. There had to be some logical, analytical reason for it. It could be related to the powers she had stolen, but she wasn't about to divest herself of her authority. That was an exchange she was unwilling to make.
So she moved, oversaw her domain, and tried as best she could to distract herself. Black wings took her through the air, hidden from prying eyes below. And even here she felt like she was being watched. Clouds drifted past as she scanned the horizon, on the lookout. For what exactly she didn't know, but she had a gut feeling that it was Her.
And as she winged past a cloud bank she saw it. Her, as expected, floating there in the sky with no issue, hair and dress gently taken in the wind, but no wings to elevate Her. And still She wore that sad look on Her face.
Eyes narrowed in determination as the world stopped in motion and she powered forward, closing the distance in a rush. And for once She didn't vanished. Instead, She let Homura get about halfway before moving as well, vanishing into the nearby clouds. Of course She would do that, Homura thought to herself cynically.
It didn't deter her though, and she plunged after Her into the clouds, temperature dropping as moisture slicked past annoyingly. But there was no sight of Her, as Homura expected. Still, she had to try. Pulling up, she marshaled her power and whipped her wings out, blowing the cloud apart in a flare of energy.
As wisps of white liquid filtered away, she looked about, and frowned to see nothing still. With a sigh, she got underway again. This situation could not continue. She would not allow it.
Somebody, somebody
You got a feelin' somebody's following you
Somebody, somebody
You got a feelin' somebody's following you
The group sat clustered up on the roof, Mami having provided a lunch box for Kyoko, since the redhead didn't have her own lunch. She'd done the same for Nagisa, nice person that she was. Sayaka certainly appreciated the salvation that it provided for her wallet, even if it didn't save her lunch most of the time. And of course, Madoka had her own lunch, prepared by her father.
"Hey, eat your own food," Sayaka protested as Kyoko took the opportunity to cherry pick from the blunette's lunch box.
"Sorry, no can do," Kyoko replied as she popped the stolen veggie into her mouth. "Not my fault you got good stuff."
For some reason, that wasn't a satisfactory answer. "You have all that stuff Mami made for you. Why don't you eat that and leave my lunch alone?"
"I don't have to explain myself to you." Kyoko smirked, chewing on her treat.
"Now girls, calm down," Mami interjected, feeding Nagisa some cheese. "There's plenty of food for the both of them. So Kyoko, appreciate what you have, or else there will be consequences." She smiled sweetly, yet it was a smile that made Kyoko shiver nervously.
The two calmed down under that influence, and they resumed eating. Sayaka glanced over, noticing Madoka's lunch was untouched. Instead, she was just giving a forlorn look to her lap. "Yo, Madoka, you alright," Sayaka asked, worried a bit to see her friend sad. Given that Madoka was one of the most upbeat people she knew, there had to be something wrong.
Madoka started from her thoughts, suddenly aware that she was being spoken to. "Huh? Oh." She gave a small smile as she looked over to Sayaka. "I'm fine," she replied before her smile fell. "Have you noticed something up with Homura-chan recently? She's been acting weird, and I'm not sure if it's my fault."
Sayaka paused to think, ignoring Kyoko as the redhead resumed pilfering from her lunch box. 'Yeah, she's been acting weird I guess. Weirder than normal anyway. Like, distracted and stuff. Extra irritable." She gave Madoka a comforting look then. "But I doubt it's your fault. She's just like that."
"Oh," Madoka replied, somewhat comforted by Sayaka's reassurances, but still concerned after a fashion. Homura might be aloof, but she wasn't a bad person. If she had a problem, then Madoka wanted to help, if Homura would let her do that.
"Don't stress about it," Sayaka continued with a shrug. "She's always been like this. As far as I'm concerned, it's just more of the same."
She went back to slapping Kyoko's hand away while Madoka considered that. She was aware of Sayaka's enmity with Homura, mostly justified by personal feelings of dislike rather than anything Homura had done. It was a state of affairs she was working on, slowly but surely.
She was distracted then by the sound of feet climbing the stairs to the roof where they currently were. Looking over, she saw Homura emerge from concealment, the girl wearing light black rings around her eyes, hair blowing in the wind behind her, yet walking with a determined gait, fists clenched.
"Homura-chan," Madoka said aloud, concern painted across her face as she watched the stoic girl approach the group.
But Homura ignored her for the moment, instead stepping up to Nagisa and Mami, not losing that determination she held. "Oh, hello Homura-san," Mami commented with a smile and her usual warmness. "How are-"
She was cut off as Homura pressed a black feather she had produced from nowhere to her forehead, her eyes losing focus as she took on a dazed expression. Homura glared at her in the while, eyes boring into her as she did...whatever it was, before she ripped the feather away once more.
"Hey, what the heck," Sayaka protested vocally, rising from her seat. "What do you think you're doing Akemi?"
Homura didn't grace that question with an answer, and instead moved in the blink of an eye to apply the same feather to Nagisa's forehead, and then Kyoko's. How she moved was unnatural, like she was teleporting somehow, and it scared Madoka. But at the same time it stirred something inside her, her head struggling to cope. She shied back, battling with these swelling emotions of familiarity, yet unable to remember.
"Stay back! I'm warning-" Sayaka's protests were cut short as Homura appeared in front of her then, applying the same feather she held. Pupils dilated as the blunette fell silent, obviously providing at least a little mental resistance. But it didn't matter in the end as Homura did it regardless, then vanished and reappeared in front of Madoka.
Madoka shrank back more, if that were possible, body wracked with fear and on the verge of tears. "Homura-chan, why...why are you doing this?"
Homura paused, considering the pinkette in front of her for a few, brief, agonizing seconds. Eventually though, she responded to the question. "I have to be rid of Her. She's always following me, watching me. I don't know how you're making Her appear, my dear Madoka, but I won't allow it."
Her head pounded like a jackhammer in her skull, pulsing and only adding to the confusion prevalent in her mind. Then, a breakthrough as memories forced their way back from where they were hidden. Her eyes flared gold as power rippled around her. "I...I remember. All of it. What you did."
Homura smirked then. "Good. Now forget once more. And leave me in peace." Without further hesitation she pressed the black feather to Madoka's forehead. Power flowed through it, forcing itself onto the restored Goddess with ruthless force. She fought back as best she could, but it was too soon, she wasn't ready. Her defenses fell, and-
….
Blinking, Madoka found herself on the roof, lunch box on her lap, her friends nearby, and Homura standing in front of her. She looked around, noting the general confusion that everyone else except the raven haired girl seemed to be suffering, and her gaze drifted back to Homura, almost begging for answers.
"I'm glad we had this talk Madoka. Until next time," Homura commented, as if picking up off a prior conversation. She flipped her hair over her shoulder before walking away without a backwards glance, whatever she had come here for resolved.
All eyes fixated on her as the group watched Homura depart the rooftop. "What was that about," Sayaka asked, brow furrowing as she tried to remember. But nothing immediately presented itself, leaving only her imagination.
"I don't know," Mami admitted, subdued. "I doubt it was that important, if we don't remember."
Madoka frowned sadly, glancing to where the mysterious girl had departed. "Homura-chan," she said to herself, even though she didn't know why she felt the way she did.
There's a jack-o-lantern moon in the midnight sky
Somebody gonna live, somebody gonna die
She'd done it at last. The image was gone, her memory wipe having apparently succeeded in destroying what was irritating her. She could only assume it had been some part of Madoka's powers that had reactivated without her knowing it. And her recent actions had put that power back under. It was something she'd have to watch out for in the future.
But now She was gone, and Homura could rest easy. She walked calmly, a newly restored, nearly invisible spring in her step, and enjoyed her world once more. Without that irritation, everything was good again, and she was at peace.
Moving along, she considered what to do next. The Wraith were under control, the Incubators behaving themselves for the moment. Her realm was stable, and everyone unsuspecting of the reality as it was. Perhaps she should visit Mami, and have some tea with her. The only concern was her asking too many questions, but she knew Mami valued company too much to push too hard into personal matters.
Making a decision, she angled for Mami's apartment, her mind's eye confirming that only the blond and Nagisa were present at the moment. Very well, she could handle that.
Turning a corner and engrossed in her thoughts, she stopped dead, surprise writ large across her features as she found herself unable to move. The world shifted to a stop almost on reflex as she looked at Her. Standing there, waiting. And She remained this time.
"You, how are you here," Homura barked in disbelief. "You can't be here. You shouldn't be here. You should be locked away, where I put you." She talked, though She was silent in turn. "It's not the Incubators, it's not the Wraith, and I mind wiped the others, so who let you out? Tell me, or the consequences will be unpleasant for you and your accomplice."
Rather than answering, She turned about and vanished, in spite of the devil's panicked forward lunge and cry of "Wait!" She was left alone on the frozen street, trembling in anger and fear, more so than she had felt before.
"No. I won't allow it. I will not allow You to undo my work," she muttered under her breath as a vow. The world lurched with her back into motion, but she did not head towards Mami's apartment. She wasn't in the mood to eat anymore.
She had to deal with this situation. Now. Her world was under siege and she had to protect it. And she had precious little information to go on. With her defining determination, she resolved to find the source of the threat, confront it, and eliminate it, by any means necessary. Hopefully that would get rid of Her. Whoever it was, they would regret challenging her order.
But down in the graveyard on that old tombstone
There's a big black crow and it's callin' you home
There was no reason, no cause, no one responsible that she could determine. There was no rational reason for Her presence. So why was She still tormenting her? She never spoke, never responded, always just stood there and watched her, no matter what Homura did.
Looking over the happenings of her world had taken a backseat to this crisis, her attention devoted to that entirely. But she would not allow her control to slip, altering the memories of people who got too suspicious, even Madoka. Especially Madoka.
Every time they met, Homura asked Her, challenged Her, but she never got an answer. Still, she tied, and had even tried to shoot Her, though she never did any damage. She never got any closer to an answer, and it wore down on her, Her presence, Her judgment, Her look.
"What right do you have to judge me," she snarled at one of those incessant meetings. "I did what I had to do for Madoka. She deserves to be happy, not sundered from reality as a Goddess. You would have her exist as a concept, separated from all she loves, in danger of being enslaved by the Incubators. I saved her, and I saved her wish. So what gives you the right to judge me for that, when I did what you couldn't?"
Another statement that went unanswered, but she was used to it by that point. It was just another problem for her to solve, another roadblock by the universe to her happy ending, and she would not fail. Not like she had before. So the universe could try to stop her if it liked. She would keep fighting as she had, until she succeeded, or could fight no more.
This applied even to those she would consider friends. In a parking garage, coming off another of those unfulfilling encounters, Homura was startled to hear footsteps approaching her from behind, the sound of shoes on concrete.
"Hey Akemi," Kyoko called, Homura not having to look to see who it was. She was familiar enough with her voice by now to tell, even if the redhead was eating pocky at the same time.
"What do you want Kyoko Sakura," Homura asked, glancing back over her shoulder.
"Nothing much," Kyoko replied with a shrug. "Just wondering who you were talking to." She looked over the other girls shoulder to see a lack of any persons in the corridor behind her.
Now that was odd, and the redhead took the opportunity to also look at Homura. "Man, you look like hell," she added, fairly shaken by the physical decline shown by the other girl.
Homura seemed unperturbed by that statement. "Thank you for your concern, but I'm fine." She turned and stepped up to Kyoko, and before the redhead could react she placed a black feather to her forehead. "My world, my rule, your peace, will not be undone," she muttered as she rewrote Kyoko's memories.
Once done, she didn't wait but brushed past Kyoko as the girl recovered. She had things to do, and threats to be stopped. She couldn't waste time here. She had to stop Her, before She ruined everything.
Turning, Kyoko watched her depart with a hum and a frown. "Man, what's up with her," she wondered aloud, before shrugging and moving along. It wasn't her problem after all.
Somebody, somebody
You got a feelin' somebody's following you
Somebody, somebody
You got a feelin' somebody's following you
Somebody
You know there's somebody
She couldn't handle it anymore. Madoka haunted her, Madoka pitied her. She saw Her in the day, night, awake and in her dreams. She wouldn't go away, and Homura was at a loss of what to do about it anymore. She couldn't rest, she found it hard to concentrate on normal affairs. She isolated herself even more, devoting herself to solving the problem. But no amount of Godly power seemed able to solve it.
She knew she was declining, and had a guess as to how she appeared to others, but she didn't care. It was a sacrifice for her goal, the maintenance of her world. It wasn't as bad as the Cycles, and she was the ruler of this world, so she could deal with it.
Now she was actively looking, school skipped to patrol and seek Her out, to confront and stop Her. Somehow. She was in her demonic glory, ready to eliminate Her on sight. She was done talking, trying to understand. This image was a threat, and had to be removed now, before whatever plan She had further manifested. There was no other choice if Madoka's salvation was to endure.
And at last her hard work was rewarded as Homura spotted Her near the industrial district. She stood there as she always did, in that infuriating manner, and Homura sprang forward with her bow at the ready. She missed her shot, as she had expected, but saw Her round the corner at the same time. Gritting her teeth, she sped forward, following Her. And she was rewarded once more, spotting her rounding a corner up ahead.
The chase began in earnest, Homura following the phantom past warehouses to rows of shipping containers, attempting to catch up to Her at every opportunity. Arrows embedded themselves in metal as she fired repeatedly, but continued to miss all of them. As expected, and she seemed unable to close the gap, but she continued on.
Powering around another lane and using her wings for added speed, Homura was prepared to attack, only to pull to a stop as the sight she was witness to. Her bow clattered from her grip, and her eyes bugged out in shock, determination to continue shattered in a single moment.
She, She, the Goddess was there, of course. But it wasn't just Her. Somehow, Madoka was there. Her Madoka, the kind, caring, human Madoka. Where had she come from? Homura's mind was reeling with the sudden hammer blow, struggling to understand.
Her main shock was reserved for the third sight though, a figure that her brain refused to comprehend. It was herself, Homura Akemi, from a hundred lifetimes ago, with red glasses and braids, meek and self conscious, herself before she became strong. She stood between the two Madokas, and behind all three of them shone a near blinding light.
"No. No, no, no no. You can't be here," Homura protested fiercely,, raging against the sad looks she got from all three of them. "You're me. You want the same thing I do. So why would you betray me like this? Why would all three of you band against me when I only want ed what's best for you. How can you do this to me Madoka, when I sacrificed my soul for you?"
She got no answer, but persisted nonetheless, turning her attention to herself. "I did it at last. I made a world where Madoka is safe. Where our life matters. Why would you choose to undo that, to render all my effort, all my suffering, all HER suffering, meaningless. You know as well as I do that a world without Madoka isn't worth being in."
She then turned her attention to Madoka, the human one. "Please, don't do this. You're happy here. You're human. Why would you give up being with the people you care about? Why would you give up being with me? I did what I had to do so you could be happy. And I will not allow the world to go back to the way it was."
The trio turned about together, Homura in the middle with hands on both her shoulders, the Goddess and Madoka smiling at her as the Devil was left to rage. In a fury she pulled out her bow, firing an arrow over the Goddess's shoulder. "No. I won't let you do this. I will hurt you if I have to."
In return she got those damn sad looks again, the ones that only served to make her angry. And the trio walked, the Goddess entering first, before Madoka looked back over her shoulder to mouth 'I'm sorry' to her, an apology that ripped her heart out in a single stroke, before she vanished into the light.
And then she, herself, the one she should have been able to trust most in the entire world, looked back at her, frowned, shook her head disapprovingly, and stepped into the light as well. It vanished then, leaving an empty hallway, and Homura could tell that Madoka was gone.
"No," she muttered, eyes cast to the ground as emotions surged. "Please. Come back. Don't leave me here. Please." Tears rolled down her cheeks as the weight of it all hit her. Familiars clustered around, raining taunts and insults upon her, mocking her for her weakness, inadequacy, for her failure.
She dropped to her knees, unchecked tears spilling forth as she realized how alone she was, and gave into the despair of it all. And as she cried, the world shattered around her. The Devil had fallen.