A/N Ja, I've had this idea for a while now, so I've finally got around to doing it ^_^ (At 2 o'clock in the morning... Thank God for half-term...) So yeah, I don't own Hetalia or any of the characters therein... Wish I did though.
Bold = Me
"Normal in speech marks" = Other characters
Bold and italics = textbook text
"Italics in speech marks" = flashback speech whooo~
HistoryFic Number 1:- Vilna 1920
Konnichiwa minna-san~! Watashi no namae wa espeoradar desu yo~!
"Etto..."
Hmm...? Yes, Kiku-sensei?
"You don't really need to put the 'yo' at the end. You'll start sounding like Sealand-kun..."
Oh yeah...
"Besides which, isn't this supposed to be in English?"
Sorry Arthur...
"I should think you are! You're British! Act like it!"
(mumble-stuck-up-posh-boy-probably-went-to-Eaton-mumble)
"What was that?"
Nothing sir! Anyway, this is a HistoryFic! Somewhat like a songfic except I read from a history text book instead of typing song lyrics in italics! ^_^
"Man! That sounds so boring~!"
"Then why don't you just go and eat a hamburger you uneducated lout!"
"Oh yeah? And whose fault would it be if I was uneducated, big brother?"
"Guys...um... please don't fight..."
It's no use, Matthew, they'll be arguing for a LONG time... So let's just put them on mute *gets remote & pushes button*
"..." *wild gestures*
"..." *flips him off*
That's better... Anyway, for this HistoryFic I will be reading somthing I found quite interesting from my text book from last year. It concerns the League of Nations and how utterly useless they were when it came to sorting out certain disagreements after World War I.
"Oh come on~! We weren't ZAT useless!"
...
"... Were we?"
Yes. Yes you were. You and England especially, actually.
"...Oh..."
ANYWAY! This concerns the dispute of the occupation of Vilna (Now Vilnius) in Lithuania, between Lithuania and Poland (both members of the League). So, is everyone ready?
"I sink Angleterre wants to be a part of zis too..."
Ok, fine. *unmutes England*
"Thank you."
You're welcome! Now, let's get this show on the road, shall we? *Ahem*...
Poland and Lithuania were two new states created by the post-war treaties.
"No we, like, totally weren't!"
"Taip! We had a commonwealth and everything!"
Yes I know that, and probably everyone else who read it knows that too! But I think it means because of the Russian control being lifted or something... I dunno, I'll look it up when I can be arsed.
Vilna (now Vilnius) was made the capital of the new state of Lithuania, but its population was largly Polish.
To be honest that doesn't surprise me in the slightest.
"*sigh*"
"Aw~ Like, lighten up, Liet. It's not THAT bad~!"
"..." *death glare*
Anyway...
In 1920 a private Polish army simply took control of it.
In fact, do you know what he technically did?
"Oh no, not that joke AGAIN!"
"Kesesese~! He totally took control of your fital regions! *laughs*"
*Groans all 'round*
*slaps Prussia in back of head* "Please shut up, Bruder..."
Thank you, Germany. ^_^ Anyway, as I was saying...
Lithuania appealed for help. This was a crucial first 'test case' for the League.
Which kinda failed and died if you ask me...
"Waitwaitwait... My people's suffering was just a 'test case'...? WHAT THE HELL?"
"Hey, like, calm down Liet. Too much stress and you'll, like, die! Dying is, like, TOTALLY not good for you!"
"Like you can tell me to calm down! You CAUSED this!"
Moving on...
Both countries were members of the League. Poland was clearly the aggressor,
"Says who?"
Says common sense!
though many people could see its case.
"What case? He just stormed in there without provocation! I pride myself on being a peaceful nation! What did I possibly do to deserve that kind of treatment?"
I dunno... did you insult his shoes or something...?
The League protested to Poland,
"Please leave Lithuania alone!"
"S'il vous plait!"
"Umm... like, NO WAY!"
but Poland refused to withdraw. The League was now stuck.
"THAT was the extent of what they could do? That's bullsh-!"
Please, don't swear Lietuva, it is most unbecoming of a gentleman such as yourself... (God, I'm starting to sound like Professor Layton...)
According to the Covenant it could have sent British and French troops to force the Poles out of Vilna.
"Well... I suppose we could send some of our troops to help you..."
"Oh you will? Really? Oh thank you all so much!"
But it did not.
"HUH? Why not?"
"Désolé~!"
The French were not prepared to upset Poland because they saw it as a possible ally against Germany in the future.
Two things spring to mind here. 1. How the hell was Poland supposed to be a scary enemy/good ally if you were to go against GERMANY? He's like freakin' ITALY!
"Only more infuriating, I swear."
"Oh, don't mean that... right, Liet?"
"..."
2. You already thought Germany would be a threat? Despite the fact that the war had just finished and you'd put so many restraints on him with the Treaty of Versailles he was probably having trouble breathing? Nan da yo?
"Well sorry for just being careful. Mon dieu... after all we had just come out of ze Great War!"
"I hate to agree with the Frog, but he's right. We really needed to be careful. We didn't know what could happen."
Is that why you wouldn't tell his bosses that they couldn't boost the economy by just printing more paper money?
"...Sure, let's go with zat!"
"Nope, for me that was out of spite."
...You're a git, Arthur!
"Whatever, I was nowhere NEAR as scared of Germany as France was. And I DEFINITELY wasn't scared of Poland!"
Britain was not prepared to act alone and send troops right to the other side of Europe.
...Git!
"Tch!"
Scared to act without France as backup, Arthur?
"...Shut up!"
In the end the League did nothing. The Poles kept Vilna.
Well done, guys! Congratulations!
"Yeah, thanks a lot..."
"Oh you're overreacting, you got it back eventually, right?"
"That's not the point!"
Anyway, next time there will be more historical stoof from my GCSE textbook! See ya next time~!
"Palauk! I'm not done yet!"
Leave it, Liet, they're not worth it. Trust me...
A/N Yeah... Just don't ask... I hope you can tell who is speaking, if not, just say and I'll add names.
T/N 'Taip' = Lithuanian for yes, 'Angleterre' = French for England, 'Mon dieu' = French for 'my god', 'S'il vous plait' = French for 'Please', 'Désolé' = French for 'Sorry' and 'Palauk!' = Lithuanian for 'Wait!' ^_^