I know, I know…I should be adding chapters to my two stories in progress, but I wanted to do a Finchel future one shot for my loyal readers. Just a forewarning, I'm not Army savvy, so please bear with any and all military mistakes.
The paper seemed heavier than usual as Rachel tugged, trying to find the perforation, wanting to reveal the tiny piece of chocolate hidden. Usually this was Caroline's job, something the small girl had eagerly looked forward to every morning for the past few weeks, however a low grade fever had crept up over night. Caroline was currently resting on the couch, her favorite blanket covering her body while she slept.
Rachel finally yanked open day number twenty-two, the small chocolate Santa tumbling out onto the floor. She bent down, blowing off the piece of candy as she inspected it. Thank goodness for the five second rule. She would save it for Caroline. Maybe after lunch she would be feeling better.
Finn had started this advent calendar ritual with Caroline when she was just over a year old. Rachel had protested; assuring her husband their daughter was much too young to understand the meaning of the calendar. However, Finn's love of chocolate and Christmas won out in the end. Each year a new paper calendar filled with tiny chocolates was hung in the kitchen, low enough for Caroline's tiny hands to reach.
Rachel's breath caught in her throat as she sat the candy on the kitchen counter. This was the first year Finn wasn't home to help decorate for the holiday he loved so much. He hadn't been home to help light the menorah on the first day of Hanukkah either. She and Caroline had done that together, including a special prayer for Finn this year. He also hadn't been home to help Caroline open any of the days on her advent calendar. She couldn't help but think back to the day he left. Even though it was only 74 days ago, it seemed like eternity to Rachel.
"Babe, I'll be back before you know it." Finn tried to reassure her.
"I know, but you've never been deployed before." The tears ran freely down Rachel's face. She was thankful Carol and Burt were visiting and had taken Caroline out for breakfast after saying their goodbyes to Finn. She didn't need her daughter seeing her any more upset than she already had.
"It's only a couple of months. Our First Lieutenant assured us we'll be home before Christmas." Finn wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.
"But a lot can happen in just a couple of months." Rachel whined, burying her head deep in his chest. She inhaled deeply, wanting to breathe in every last bit of his scent.
"You've gotta stop worrying Rachel." He nuzzled his face into the top of her head.
"I know. I need to be strong, especially for Caroline." Rachel lifted her head up to look at his face. His face was so clean shaven, his hair cut short. These were only a few of the things she would miss.
"That's my girl." He bent forward, placing a tender kiss on her lips. "You sure you don't want to go with me?"
Rachel shook her head. She had firmly decided as soon as she found out about his deployment that she didn't want to see him board the plane on the base runway. She didn't want that to be the last image in her head. Finn accepted her decision, but deep down was sad that Rachel and Caroline wouldn't be there when he left.
"I love you." He said, kissing her once again. This time his lips lingered on hers. He didn't want to let go. "Don't ever forget that."
"I won't." She whispered, her arms falling to her side as he stepped back, gathering his large duffle bag.
"I'll call you guys as soon as we get access." He winked at her before disappearing out the front door. Rachel ran to the door; a hand pressed to the glass as she watched Finn walk down the front walk to the sidewalk that ran along the front of all the residences in housing. Her eyes followed his tall form until it turned the corner one block from their house.
On instinct, she grabbed the keys to their car that were lying on the wooden desk near the front door. She didn't even bother finding her purse or a jacket. Rachel sprinted to the car, hoping the plane wasn't leaving anytime soon. She fumbled with the keys, dropping them several times before finally getting them in the ignition. She raced over to the runway, cursing the other drivers who opted to do the speed limit. Parking in the nearest space she could find, Rachel jumped out and ran as fast as she could to the runway. The plane hadn't left, but Finn's company was lining up in formation, ready to board.
"Finn." She called out. Several heads turned, including other family members on the runway. Finn turned his head at the sound of his name, a broad grin on his face when he saw Rachel waving her arms at him frantically. He slipped out of line quietly, rushing over to her.
"I couldn't do it." She tried to hold the tears back. Her eyes were already red and puffy from earlier. "I couldn't just sit home while you boarded the plane."
"I'm glad you came." He hugged her tight.
"Please be careful and know that we'll be thinking about you every second of every minute." Rachel tried to manage a smile.
"Same goes for me." Finn rubbed her back before slowly pulling away. He knew he needed to get back before they noticed his was missing.
"Come back to me soon." Rachel kissed his lips before releasing her grip on him.
"I promise." Finn called over his shoulder.
Rachel looked on as he boarded the plane, waving to him one last time before he disappeared through the door.
"Mommy." Caroline's shrill startled her. "Can I have some juice?"
Rachel fumbled through a kitchen cabinet looking for her favorite cup. She poured the child some white grape juice.
"How are you feeling?" Rachel handed her the cup then ran her hand along her forehead. "Your head feels a little cooler."
"Is daddy home yet?" Caroline asked, before taking a sip of her juice. This was the same question she had asked every day since Finn had left. Rachel had hoped she would have been able to tell her yes by now, but that wasn't the case.
"Can I talk to mommy now?"Finn asked. It was his weekly phone call more than halfway through his deployment. Caroline had been busy giving him every detail of the Thanksgiving party she had at pre-school.
"Ok, but I still have lots more to tell you daddy." Caroline whined.
"I know sweetie, but daddy only gets a very short time on the phone and I need to make sure I talk to mommy too." Finn could hear the child sigh through the phone.
"Hello." Rachel said, anxiously waiting to hear his voice as she did every week. Hearing his voice meant that he was okay.
"Hey." Finn smiled when he heard her speak.
"Caroline had an awful lot of Thanksgiving stuff to tell you." Rachel giggled. "Wait til she tells you about Grandpa spilling some gravy on Uncle Kurt's suede pants."
"I'm glad you were able to go to Ohio to spend Thanksgiving with your dads and my folks." Finn replied.
"We missed you though. Your parents will be here for Christmas. They actually want to come when you get home, if that's ok?" Rachel waited for his response but he was silent. "Is everything ok Finn?"
"I need to talk to you about Christmas." Finn swallowed thickly. He had been dreading this conversation with her. "We just found out that we're not going to be home until the first week of January."
"Wait. What?" She asked, hoping she had just misunderstood what he said.
"I won't be home for Christmas, Rachel." He practically whispered the words.
"Oh, I see." She was fighting back the tears that were forming in the corner of her eyes. How was she going to explain this to their four year old daughter?
"Please don't be upset with me." Finn begged, glancing at his watch. He knew his time was just about up.
"I'm not. I'm just disappointed, that's all." Rachel's chipper attitude was now replaced with a much more sullen one.
"I've got to go." Finn sighed. "I love you. Give Caroline a kiss for me."
She hung up the phone slowly, oblivious to Caroline whining in her ear that she still needed to talk to her daddy. Not only had Finn missed Caroline's fourth birthday and Thanksgiving, now he would miss Christmas too.
"No he's not." Rachel smoothed her daughter's hair. "Remember, I told you daddy has to stay for a little bit longer and then he'll come home to us."
"I hope it's soon." Caroline pouted.
"Me too, baby. Me too." She kissed the top of Caroline's head before retreating back into the kitchen.
Rachel pulled the blanket up to her chin, curling up to try and get warmer. The last 74 nights had not been kind to her. She was so used to having Finn's body next to hers. Once that side of the bed was empty, she found it difficult to not only fall asleep but stay asleep. Some nights she allowed Caroline to crawl into bed with her. Other nights she would find herself standing in Caroline's bedroom, watching her daughter sleep, in awe of how much she resembled her father.
On this particular night she found her mind wandering to the impending holidays. Finn's parents, along with Kurt and Blaine, were coming to Fort Drum to visit. Mostly, Rachel figured, because they were all missing Finn and didn't want Rachel and Caroline to feel all alone at Christmas.
Her eyes were getting heavy, so heavy in fact that she didn't hear the doorbell ring. It rang once more; this time her eyes opened. She squinted to see the numbers on the clock. No one in their right mind would be visiting at this time of night. Her heart was beating fast as she fumbled in the dark for her robe. She didn't even bother tying it as she scurried down the short hallway, hoping Caroline hadn't woken up.
Rachel peeked out the front window, her breath catching in her throat as she saw the silhouette of a man standing on her porch. His back was facing the door, but in the moonlight she could clearly see he was wearing army fatigues. Oh God no, please not Finn, she thought. There was only one reason anyone from the Army appeared on your doorstep in the middle of the night; it was the one thing every military spouse dreaded. She fumbled with the deadbolt as she tried desperately to fight back the tears.
"Merry Christmas babe." Finn whirled around as soon as Rachel opened the door, his duffel bag in hand. A cold burst of air followed him in, but she didn't even notice as she practically fell into his arms.
"Finn? Oh, I was so worried." She tried to restrain her emotions. "I didn't know that was you. All of these terrible thoughts were going through my…"
"Sorry I had to ring the doorbell this late, but I didn't have my key." Finn placed a finger to her lips. "It's ok, I'm fine. Plus they don't show up in fatigues anyways."
"That's not funny." Rachel sniffed. "What are you doing home? I thought you weren't coming back until January?"
"It all happened so fast. Our Lieutenant Commander said the orders came in to bring us home early. I tried calling you yesterday, but you must've been out." Rachel thought back to the quick grocery store trip she and Caroline took the day before in anticipation of their holiday guests.
"I, I can't believe you're home." She touched his face, then ran her hand through his hair, bringing her hand back to touch his face once again.
"Would it be ok if I woke up Caroline?" Finn asked.
"She hasn't been felling well, but something tells me this will make her feel a whole lot better." Rachel smiled, pulling Finn into her arms.
He brushed his lips against her, kissing her harder, before reaching for her hand and pulling her down the hallway towards Caroline's bedroom.
"Caroline." Rachel called out. "Daddy's finally home."