Chapter One
I found myself looking into another of the tall mirrors that were all around the room. I fist saw my face, still a light dusting of pink across my cheekbones from the embarrassment of what I'd just seen. And then I looked past me; he was standing alone. His midnight blue frock coat, with the diamante neck, highlighted his mischievous blue eyes. The ruffles of pale gray silk that were at his throat and wrists set off the pallor of his skin perfectly. The black tights and black, his shiny boots, emphasized his long legs. He was holding a horned mask on a stick, but he lowered it now, to look straight at me in the mirror. Directly behind him, dancers were whirling in the great ballroom...And he held out his hand to me.
I turned slowly to face him, expecting him not to be there when I had fully turned around, but he was. He was still holding his hand out to me and I took it, almost hesitantly, feeling dizzy.
Then we were spinning around the ballroom, and being safely in his arms, I didn't feel dizzy anymore. 'I am the loveliest woman at the ball,' I thought and knew this to be true be the way that he was smiling down at me. He held no attention for anyone but me. The touch of his hands on my body was thrilling and dancing with him felt like the easiest and most natural motion as we spun around the room.
"You are absolutely stunning and most beautiful, my dear," he said with a smile.
"I feel...I feel like...I-don't know what I feel," I answered honestly. I felt confused and didn't understand why.
He was amused. "Don't you?"
"I feel like...I'm in a dream, but I don't remember ever dreaming anything like this!" I was starting to put the pieces into place, but my mind was sluggish; not working right.
He pulled away from me slightly and laughed fondly, like what I said was endearing. "You'll have to find your way into the part," he said, and whirled me around the room.
I smiled up at him; thinking about how handsome he was. Should I tell him this? But one doesn't tell a man such things, did one? It was also more than that. There was something in his face that was open, like he was really enjoying the moment. His face lacked the mocking or secretiveness that I had seen on all the other faces here.
"And when you've found your way in, " he was saying as we keep whirling around the floor, "stay in your dream, Sarah." He was looking straight into my eyes. His smile was serious as he said, "Believe me. If you want to be truly free, wholly yourself-you do want that, don't you?"
I nodded, the words to agree totally lost to me. I was starting to notice that it's really hard to think, let alone speak, when he looks at me like that.
"Then you will find what you want only as long as you stay in your dream. Once abandon it, and you are at the mercy of other people's dreams. They will make of you what they want you to be. Forget them, Sarah. Trust to your dream."
I was spellbound. He was talking to my very soul. I was hanging on his every word, knowing that what he was saying was truth.
"Trust to me," he said, moving his face closer to mine. "Can you do that?"
I nodded, and looked up at him with anticipation. 'His going to kiss me,' I thought, closing my eyes like I had seen my mother do in some of her roles.
I suddenly opened my eyes. Something wasn't right. I realized that it was the music; it had stopped. He dropped his hands so now they were resting at his sides and he stepped back. Everyone around us had stopped, watching us. It was like the whole room was holding its breath.
He smiled sadly, "You are cruel, Sarah. We are well matched, you and I. I need your cruelty just as you need mine."
I felt my mouth gape open. What was happening?
"I had even reordered time," he said now and the thirteen-hour clock appeared behind him; the same clock that had haunted me throughout his world. The big hand hit the thirteen and started chiming. "I did it all for you," he said over the bell being rung. The people around us started moving, slowly, closer to us.
I was lost. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. When did it start going wrong? What's going on? Did I fail?
"I asked so little, just for you to believe in me, and you could've had everything you wanted...everything you have ever dreamed of...your dreams, Sarah!" His eyes shone brilliantly with emotion. I took a step closer to him, reaching out to him.
He took a step back, away from me. "Just to fear me and love me," he said now in a gentle voice, "and do as I say, and I...-"
The last of the chimes were sounding and the crowd of people was closing in around me. I hadn't noticed until now how close they had come to me; too confused to see where they were, my only concern being the man in front of me. I could hardly even make out his blond hair over the head and bodies now surrounding me.
"Wait!" I cried. The people, all wearing masks, were swallowing me up. I could barely breathe. They were smothering me, taking me down and farther away from him. And still the clock chimed on.
"WAIT!"