Crash and burn
Chapter one
I stood in a line of my peers waiting to be scanned in the Galactic Convention hall. The walls and floors were all made of metal. The scanner loomed over all of us in order to scan for any weapons that could be used to assassinate the Almighty Tallest, the tallest of the Irkens and our almighty rulers. Posters of them were plastered all over the place, showing the smiling faces of Tallest Red and Purple, named after the colors they always wore. The line had inched up and I was the next to pass through the x-ray machine. I felt a strange tug as my laser gun flew into the machine. With a sound like thunder, the machine exploded, launching shrapnel into the air. Behind me all the Irkens shouted in protest. I smiled as I collected what was left of my Trainee grade gun and scampered away. "That should keep them from crowding up the auditorium."
As I approached the arena the crowd jumped up in glee. The Almighty Tallest were already on stage. I cursed to myself. Why I even bothered with trying to get a meal from Foodcourtia, I don't know. I silently urged my PAK to fly me over to the stage where I should have been long ago. "Welcome mighty Irken soldiers! You are the finest examples of military training the Irken army has to offer! Good for you. Standing behind us, however, are the soldiers we've chosen for roles in the most crucial part of operation impending doom II!" Red shouted to make sure everyone in the crowd could hear. I touched down a bright screen behind me flickered into existence with a galactic map. Red continued, "You in the audience just get to sit and watch."
"You should have tried harder." Purple smiled with glee at the disappointed faces of the crowd.
Red gave a annoyed look at Purple and continued. "These superior ones-"
"-Not quite as superior as us of course!" Purple interrupted.
Red held back a chuckle. "Pfff… Duh! These less superior than us but still quite superior soldiers will each be assigned to an enemy planet!"
"There you will blend in with the hideous native inhabitants." Purple chimed in
Red once again fought against Purple in order not to lose his thunder. "All while gathering crucial information, assessing the planet's weaknesses, making it vulnerable to our big… space ship… gang!"
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. They really seemed to have no clue about what they are going to do after all these planets are conquered.
"Invader Meki!" Purple called. I choked back any fear I had and walked onstage. I tried not to give them any reason to send me to the planet with the slaughtering rat people. They only seemed occupied with how tall I was and not the fact that I was a new invader. "You will be sent to Planet Leta, Home to the happiness zombies!" I nodded and took my place.
"Invader Bullit!"
Up next was a thin Irken boy with blue eyes and a scowl plastered across his face. He was average size for an Irken invader. The only thing that seemed to set him apart was the one bent antenna. Purple was not impressed. "Wow aren't you a shortie!" Bullit's eyes flashed with anger. Purple took the hint. "You will be on Planet Driene, Home of the Sky Sharks." Inside I cringed at the thought of flying in my Voot Cruiser with giant sharks that live in the sky. Purple seemed unfazed by the look of distaste Bullit gave him. "And last, Invader Skoodge!"
A short portly invader walked up to them. He was the smallest invader (height wise) I had ever seen. Judging by the stain on his shirt I could tell he was in a rush to get here as well. Red looked down upon Skoodge. "Oh, now that's just sad."
"Could you get any shorter?" Purple said, loud enough for the entire crowd to here. I am so glad that I am not that guy right now. Skoodge looked like he was about to burst into tears.
Red decided to get this over with. "You will be assigned to Blorch, home of the slaughtering rat people. Thank you."
A picture of Invader Skoodge being attacked by the rat people appeared behind him. A terrified Skoodge walked heavily back to where all the other invaders stood.
Red smiled, happy to get back home. "Thus concludes the great assigning! Help yourself to some nachos, and we'll see you at the equipping station."
"Yes, gorge yourselves you mooches!" Purple shouted.
That is when I saw something strange. One tiny Irken hand was raised and a very familiar voice emanated from the crowd. "No, no, no! Wait!"
Red and Purple both stopped in their tracks. "That voice!" Red said in a terrified voice.
A small Irken boy crawled onstage. Red and Purple backed away in surprise. "No!"
"It can't be!"