A crack fanfic with the pairing Sanada/Shinji on request.

x x You're the orange juice of my morning.

Sanada Genichirou liked to go out to eat breakfast. He found it rather soothing, being able to eat out by himself, and drink his favourite orange juice (fresh squeezed with just the right amount of pulp) in silence.

That was... before he came along.

'Oh. You like orange juice? I don't really like it. Its opacity disturbs me, and I don't like the colour of it. Also, it tastes kind of bad, especially the pulpy ones. All the pulp gets stuck in your teeth later, and then people look at you strangely. It's so hard to get out of your teeth later. Is that a Western breakfast? I like Western breakfasts too, Sanada.'

Sanada felt an extreme urge to slap Ibu Shinji in the face really hard.

The urge grew when Shinji sat down in front of him.

'You don't eat as much as I expect you to, Sanada. There's still this mountain of food on your plate. I see a slice of toast with butter. I personally don't really like butter either, being animal fat and all. I find it kind of wrong. But then I find a lot of things kind of wrong, but nobody ever bothers to ask. Like, there was that time Echizen took my grip tape-'

Sanada knew that even if he slapped Shinji, he wouldn't shut up (from previous attempts). He glared, hoping that Shinji would shut up.

'The grip tape he took still isn't in stock yet. The store owner says they won't be for a while. My racquet isn't the same without that grip tape. Echizen stole it from me. I saw it first. I don't think it wa-mph!'

Sanada leant back, satisfied. Shinji muttered, 'You shouldn't kiss me when I'm not expecting it-'

'Shinji. Shut up.'

'...Sorry.'

Sanada loved to go out and eat breakfast in the morning. x owari

x omake

'Ah? Here again?'

Ryoma nodded at the storekeeper, who was smiling. 'I came in for some more grip tape...'

'You get the last roll. Use it sparingly. We won't restock for a few months.'

x x x

And when will my insanity end? Please review xD Criticism is very welcome, flames even more so (on something as cracky as this). -awinchan