Something I Can Never Have

Melawen Greenleaf

Rating: R

Romance/Action/Tragedy

Disclaimer: Vash the Stampede belongs to Yasuhiro Nightow. And all the stuff from Lord of the Rings belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien.

Summary: Vash meets a very intriguing woman with a curious past connected with his, and an even more curious race. But her past, however, seems to have an evil vendetta against her. Could Vash possibly help her without falling for her? A fusion of the Lord of the Rings trilogy and the Trigun series. It takes place many years before the Trigun series actually begins. I might warn you that this isn't a one- shot thing. This goes on for lots and lots of chapters.

...:::Chapter One: White Glow:::...

The two suns shone fiercely on Gunsmoke the day that Vash arrived at the city of Augusta. He'd gotten himself a room in a small, homely hotel. He could smell fresh donuts baking somewhere, and hear the chatter of happy, vibrant people all around him. But there was something he heard that was much more intriguing. The bright, light laughter of children. He smiled to himself. It was a cheerful, happy day. He purchased a bag of fresh, soft donuts and ate them as he sauntered about the city. The air seemed to be laughing as well.
He came upon an orphanage, where soft, bouncy instrumental music played, and a woman played with the children of the orphanage. She was dancing with them, laughing, and playing. (Author's note: Think Renaissance Faire music. That's what's playing.) It wasn't her apparent beauty that had attracted him, but the way she seemed to, well, glow. Her long, wavy waist length hair was the shade of a red dawn, and her skin, oddly enough, was an almost pure milk white. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail in such a way that her ears were covered. She wore a long, embroidered white gown with a low neckline and long belled sleeves. She wore no shoes. She smiled brilliantly as she danced around the children.
Vash wandered into the courtyard where the curious looking woman and the children played. Their game looked fun, and he wanted to join. And quite possibly meet this interesting woman.
"Hey, guys!" Vash called, "Can I join in?"
The children paused in their dancing and looked at him. Confused expressions in their eyes. They all looked at the woman simultaneously. She looked at the kids, then at Vash.
"Yes, of course!" she called back to him. Vash smiled. He walked over to the group of children crowded around the woman and held out the bag of donuts.
"Would any of you like one?" His offer was met with vibrant agreement, and each child took one. The woman smiled at his kindness, but didn't take one. After each child had gotten a donut, he held the bag out to her. "Wouldn't you like one, miss?"
"Oh, no, thank you. I'd prefer if you and the children enjoyed them," she said lightly.
Vash shrugged, ate a few donuts, and went to play with the children. The woman brought out a ball and they all began to play, kicking it this way and that. Vash noticed that every time the woman kicked the ball, she never winced, despite the fact that she was kicking a ball with her bare foot. The game continued until a little girl of about four fell and scraped her knee badly. Her cries stopped the game, and Vash rushed to the little girl.
By the time Vash got to the little girl, however, the woman clad in white was already by her side, silencing the little girl's crying and wiping away her tears.
"Shhh. It's okay, Annie," the woman whispered gently, "it's just a little scrape. I'll fix it."
She picked up the little girl and carried her to the front porch of the orphanage. Vash coaxed the kids back into the game, occasionally looking over to the porch, where the woman clad in white tended to Annie's knee. She wrapped the girl's knee in bandages after applying some sort of strong smelling ointment. He could smell it all the way in the middle of the courtyard. It smelled like mint with a slight undertone of roses. The little girl, Annie, was back in the game, not a single tear apparent on her face.
"How are you feeling, Annie?" Vash asked the tiny girl softly. She smiled in response.
"I'm all better. Mellie fixed my knee for me," the little girl replied in her slightly squeaky voice and smiled.
"Who's Mellie?"
"Her," Annie turned and pointed at the woman.
The woman, 'Mellie,' was walking back to the group. And it was then that Vash noticed her eyes. They were white, with a rim of jade green around the milky irises and pupils. Why did he recognize them? 'Mellie' patted Annie's head when she got to them.
"Forgive my rudeness," she said, holding out her perfectly white hand, "I've forgotten to introduce myself. I'm Melawen."
Vash grabbed hold of her petite hand with his real hand, and shook it gently. The warmth of her hand radiated through the thick leather of his glove. "I'm... uh..." He was noticing how lightly her hair seemed to frame her face. 'Nice,' he thought to himself, 'too nice. She looks familiar. Where do I know her from?'
"You're..."
"Ericks. Sorry. Had something on my mind."
"Well, Ericks, it's getting dark, and it's almost dinner time. Would you like to join us?"
"Would I!"
Melawen smiled brilliantly, and called the kids inside to help prepare dinner. The kids and Vash stampeded into the orphanage, and straight into the kitchen. Melawen disappeared for a few minutes, and returned with an old red book. She gave assignments to the kids while Vash stood aside. He was speaking to one of the nuns that helped run the orphanage. She was a short, squat woman with a kindly face, and a cheery, grandma- like smile.
"Oh, hello mister," she'd said when she spotted him in the kitchen, "are you looking to adopt a child?"
"No, I'm not. Sorry. I'm here for dinner."
"Oh. It's such a shame. All of these children are so wonderful. People just don't adopt as often as they used to."
"Yeah. They're great kids. But, I've never seen anyone like Melawen before. Do you know where she's from?"
"Oh, I couldn't tell you that. She doesn't speak much of where she comes from. But, she's a blessing. Been with us nearly four months now."
"Four months?"
"Four months. She came to us looking for sanctuary. She looked so lost and helpless that we couldn't refuse. It's a shame that this is her last week. She's been such a great help."
"Do you know where she'll be going?"
"Oh, I wish I knew. I don't like the idea of someone like her being all alone. I'd better be off to tend to my duties. Enjoy your meal."
"Thank you."
The nun disappeared into the chapel of the orphanage, and Vash walked further into the kitchen. Melawen was helping a particularly tiny little boy with some lasagna noodles.
"Hey, guys! What's for dinner?" he asked cheerfully, as a savory aroma filled his nostrils.
"It's called 'Lasagna of Minas Tirith!'" a little girl replied, "Mellie's teaching us how to make it!"
"It smells good!"
He was about to dip one of his fingers into a pot of merrily burbling sauce, when Melawen delivered a sharp slap to the back of his hand, and he drew back.
"Uh-uh, Ericks. No sampling if you're not helping. On top of that, your gloves are filthy. We're almost done, anyway. You should wash up. Then, after that, you can help set the table." Vash gave her his best puppy- dog expression, but she just pointed her finger sternly toward the doorway of the kitchen. "The bathroom's down the hall, the seventh door to your left."
Vash schlumped his way to the bathroom, and washed his hands, then cleaned the dust off his gloves, thoughts flying about in his head all the while. Where had he seen Melawen before? Why did she look so familiar? When he shook her hand, he'd felt a surge of energy. Why? Why did he feel disrespectful when he felt like flirting with her like he did with every other woman he encountered? He stayed in the bathroom until he heard Melawen call for him. His stomach growled loudly at the thought and smell of food. He put on his gloves and left the bathroom as he found it. As soon as he reached the kitchen, Melawen placed a stack of tin dinner plates in his hands.
"You can help Annie and Jessup with the table," she said almost mother- like, "and then you can help them clear the dishes when we're done." She smiled, patted his cheek gently, and went back into the kitchen.

Annie came out, followed by a slightly older boy, Jessup. Annie had tin cups in her arms, and Jessup had a fistful of forks in one hand, and a fistful of knives in the other. Vash, Jessup, and Annie began setting the table, as more kids began bringing food to the table. Salads, rolls, pitchers of water. After all the setting up was done, Melawen and two of the older kids brought out three large casserole dishes of Lasagna of Minas Tirith. They all sat, said grace, and then Melawen began to pass out slices of lasagna. Dinnertime passed with lots of chattering and laughter, and dessert consisted of something called 'Haldir's Secret,' which proved to satiate the kids' sweet tooths without having too much sugar. Vash, Jessup, and Annie cleared the table afterwards, taking the dishes into the kitchen where Melawen washed and dried them. Vash helped Melawen put the kids to sleep, then sat with her on the front porch, talking.
"Beautiful night," Melawen whispered, looking up at the night skies.
"Yeah. You can see all the stars."
"Do you know any constellations, Ericks?"
"Not really. Do you?"
"Oh, yes. Look," she said, leaning closer to him, pointing at some stars, "do you see those stars grouped together there?"
"Where?"
"Right there," she traced out a pattern in the stars, and Vash noticed the constellation.
"Oh. Yeah, I do. What's that?"
"That's Orion, the Hunter."
"Hmm."
"So, do you live somewhere nearby, Ericks?"
"Nah, just passing through. What about you? One of the sisters told me that you've been here for four months. Was there something wrong where you were living before?"
"There's always something wrong where I come from. If it isn't fighting, there's usually just an unpleasant feeling in the air. I just wanted to get away from it, so I left."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Of course you can, Ericks."
"Where do you come from?"
Melawen closed her eyes at the question. "You wouldn't believe me if I tried to explain it."
"Try me."
"Okay, then. I'm not exactly what one would call human, Ericks. My people weren't even supposed to be on this planet. I am of a race called Elf. There are very few of us now. Only a few families, and perhaps some of what we call Elandili, or 'Half-Elf' in your language. I believe I should drop the ruse, and call you by your proper name, shoudn't I, Vash?"
Vash jumped and looked over at her. "I don't think I told you my real name. How do you know that?"
"Simple. As I'm an Elf, I can gain knowledge of a plant's life just by touching it. And, as I recall, you are a plant. I knew you were a plant when I shook your hand, and I learned your name and history when I patted your face."
"So you invade the privacy of people's minds?"
"Oh, no. That's just an automatic thing that happens. It only works with plants, not humans. I couldn't read a human's mind even if my life depended on it."
"Oh."
"Where was I? Ah, yes, my people weren't supposed to exist on this planet. We were supposed to die with the planet Earth. But, a woman on the SEEDS team named Rem took pity on the people of my race and arranged for us to have some space on some of the ships. She argued with her superiors about how nobody deserved to die." Vash's heart nearly stopped. Rem. "In the end, we ended up having an entire ship to ourselves. Not that we needed an entire ship, but one of the others on the SEEDS team felt that, as we weren't human, we needed to be separated from everyone else. Some of us slept, frozen, and some of us didn't, myself included. We managed the ship, making sure none of our kin were too frozen. We kept in constant contact with the mothership, where you and Rem Savarem were. When the ships were coming down on this planet, Rem asked us to help her override the command, which we did, and we lost contact with Rem and the mothership. We later learned that the SEEDS mothership had exploded. Many of the Elves that remained awake died when they learned that Rem had passed."
"They died? How?"
"Elves cannot die of old age, as we do not age at all. Disease and pestilence cannot touch us, for we are immune. The only way an Elf may taste of death is through heartbreak, being slain in battle, or if we tire of our lives and wish to pass on. As such, our bodily wounds rarely heal completely. Many of the Elves that remained awake that knew Rem and regarded her as a valued companion, and even gave her an Elvish nickname, died slowly of heartbreak upon learning that she had died. We tried to etch out a living on this dusty planet, but it was impossible. We needed plant life to sustain our own lives. We had grown much accustomed to living in tune with the vegetation on Earth, and we could not live side-by-side with the humans. They wouldn't understand our Elvish ways. So we found a geo- plant and helped it grow. From there, we created life by means of our own magic. There is only one Elf city on this entire planet, fashioned much like an Elf city that existed on Earth called Lothlórien. The city is guarded well by both Elvish magic and Elvish guards. It is rare that an Elf will leave there. The name of this city is Silmataurea, 'Neverwinter Woods' in the common tongue. We experience many seasons there. Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring. Every condition that existed on Earth exists in Silmataurea. We also grow vegetables and send them to each of the human cities."
"Why don't your people ever leave?"
"Many of us are fair skinned, just as I am. The suns play hell with their complexions, and deaden their senses."
"But, you seem to be doing just fine."
"That's because I absorb solar energy."
"How's that?"
"My mother is part Elf, part dryad."
"What's a dryad?"
"A spirit of the woods. They help plants grow." She stood and stretched, then went to the doorway of the orphanage. "Well, are you satiated, Mr. Vash? Are you content with your new knowledge?"
"Just one more thing."
"Yes?"
"How old are you?"
Melawen paused before going inside the orphanage. "I will be 67,000,000,000 years of age in two weeks. Good night, Vash. I hope you find your hotel safely." She entered and closed the door behind her, leaving Vash on the front porch. He grinned sadly to himself. Finally, after all these years, he had another connection with someone else who also knew Rem.