Act I
1.1 Scene I
1.1.1
(All princesses are seated with Alice sitting in the middle. They pretend to talk)
Narrator It was just another ordinary tea party at Alice's Wonderland. All the beautiful princesses were enjoying their four o' clock tea, chattering happily to one another. Little did they know that danger was about to strike… and strike it did...
Alice Hello, fair ladies! I hope you are enjoying your tea. Dear Rapunzel, you simply must tell me what shampoo you use.
Rapunzel It is simply the best!
Alice Well, I suppose it must be, but what is the brand name?
Rapunzel Why, it's Clinic All Clear! I never leave hoe without it. (Takes out bottle and flashes it in front of the audience.) Now you know why it is so easy for Prince Climb-a-lot to climb upon my golden tresses. That prince just loves his harnesses. No wonder they call him Climb-a- lot.
Alice Yes, I can see why he is called that. Cinderella, I simply do not mean to be an awful gossip, but I hear that your prince, Sandalman, loves your shoes more than he loves you!
Cinderella (Replying to Alice) Well, who could blame him? I have the most fabulous taste in shoes! Not that I am saying those rumors are true! He would never love my shoes more than he loves me.
Thumbelina Listen to this. The Fairy Prince, Forget-a-lot to you all, has a memory span of two seconds. Why just yesterday, he tied the flea's collar around his neck, and gave the leash to our pet flea! How he managed to forget that he was a fairy and the flea was a flea is completely beyond me. What goes on in the mind of that fairy is a complete mystery. Bless him! The only thankful thing is that he is just as small as I am. I find myself still stunned that he found me in the flower when he did. It must be a terrible problem for you, Snow White. Prince Luv-e- rest seems taller than Mt. Everest. Or maybe it seems like that because I am smaller than a flower petal… (Alice tries to muffle a giggle)
Snow White Oh no, he is tall. Even for me. Do you know that the architects we hired to build our castle are tearing their hair out? They just cannot decide on how tall the doorway should be. Prince Luv-e-rest has bumped his head so many times that it will not be long before he will be a million times more forgetful than your Fairy Prince is.
Thumbelina No, I do not think that can happen. Fairy Prince just outdoes everyone. (Sigh) Maybe Forget-a-lot was washing his wings when they were handing out memory cards. The only remarkable thing is that he is the best fairy at the card game. But then, I think he is the only fairy who knows how to play.
Frog Princess You think you have got problems? Poor Briar Rose and I have far worse ones. My Prince Pucker-Lips is driving me batty with his kissing. He kisses everything but me! Just the other week, he tried to kiss a duck! The duck nearly bit off his lips. And just ask Briar Rose about her problem…
Briar Rose I sometimes wonder why they call me the Sleeping Beauty. They really should call prince Rock-a-bye the Sleeping Handsome. All His Highness does is sleep! It is terrible. Once, I was planning to go out, and had told him to watch over the castle. A soon as I had left, he drifted into Dreamland. Soon after, five thieves came and stole my favorite pillow! I never let him forget that!
Alice Thank god I do not have a prince! He would probably start redecorating Wonderland! But really ladies, it is simply a ball to have you all here this evening. We really must do this again sometime. And you will bring along your fabulous princes, won't you? Somehow, I wish I had invited them today, too!
Wicked Witch What? Did I hear the word 'invite'? First, there was Sleeping Ugly's birth ceremony, and now this stuuuupid tea party…. What is with you people? Doesn't anybody ever consider inviting the poor, old, wicked witch? So what if I poisoned Tar Black, or whom you so fondly call Snow White. Do you want to know a secret? She puts on white paint! She really is not that fair! (The others gasp in horror and whisper to one another)
Snow White That is not true! And you know it!
Wicked Witch Bah! Silence you nitwit! Well I have had enough of this poppycock! It is time I punished you peahens once and for all… I hereby curse Your Lownesses! You will no longer go back to your respective places, for I have mixed up your lovely fairytales, and you all will not know the difference! Now, be gone… for I have more mayhem to cause in other parts of the world.
(Princesses twirl out of sight while Alice, weeping, exits stage. Witch glides off in opposite direction cackling)
1.2 End of Scene I
1.3 Scene II
Narrator A scheme as wicked as this has never in the history of fairytales been hatched. What are the princesses to do? Will there be no hope for them? Are they doomed to live Unhappily Ever After? But wait! There still is hope! Why, through the help of the Fairy Godmother, of course! Don't any of you remember? She is the one who gave Cinderella that beautiful dress and those gorgeous glass slippers! Maybe she will be able to set things right.
(While the narrator is speaking, the props have been moved off and the background changed. After the paragraph is finished, the Fairy Godmother walks on stage.)
Godmother (Sitting on her chair and gazing into the crystal ball) Oh, what has that preposterous old windbag done his time? Played the old 'switcheroo' has she? Well this old fairy is not going to sit around twiddling her thumbs. I am going to set things right as soon as they reach their respective switches. The only problem is, how on earth will I know which princess is which? I have only worked for Cinderella so far. (Giggles softly) It would be nice to see how it turns out though. Goodness knows when I could do with a little laugh. Oh dear! (Walks off stage)
Narrator It is a good thing that not all fairies are evil witches! Maybe there is some hope for the princesses and their princes after all. Let us take a peek at how our royal mix-ups are faring.
1.4 End of Scene I
2 End of Act I
1.1 Scene I
1.1.1
(All princesses are seated with Alice sitting in the middle. They pretend to talk)
Narrator It was just another ordinary tea party at Alice's Wonderland. All the beautiful princesses were enjoying their four o' clock tea, chattering happily to one another. Little did they know that danger was about to strike… and strike it did...
Alice Hello, fair ladies! I hope you are enjoying your tea. Dear Rapunzel, you simply must tell me what shampoo you use.
Rapunzel It is simply the best!
Alice Well, I suppose it must be, but what is the brand name?
Rapunzel Why, it's Clinic All Clear! I never leave hoe without it. (Takes out bottle and flashes it in front of the audience.) Now you know why it is so easy for Prince Climb-a-lot to climb upon my golden tresses. That prince just loves his harnesses. No wonder they call him Climb-a- lot.
Alice Yes, I can see why he is called that. Cinderella, I simply do not mean to be an awful gossip, but I hear that your prince, Sandalman, loves your shoes more than he loves you!
Cinderella (Replying to Alice) Well, who could blame him? I have the most fabulous taste in shoes! Not that I am saying those rumors are true! He would never love my shoes more than he loves me.
Thumbelina Listen to this. The Fairy Prince, Forget-a-lot to you all, has a memory span of two seconds. Why just yesterday, he tied the flea's collar around his neck, and gave the leash to our pet flea! How he managed to forget that he was a fairy and the flea was a flea is completely beyond me. What goes on in the mind of that fairy is a complete mystery. Bless him! The only thankful thing is that he is just as small as I am. I find myself still stunned that he found me in the flower when he did. It must be a terrible problem for you, Snow White. Prince Luv-e- rest seems taller than Mt. Everest. Or maybe it seems like that because I am smaller than a flower petal… (Alice tries to muffle a giggle)
Snow White Oh no, he is tall. Even for me. Do you know that the architects we hired to build our castle are tearing their hair out? They just cannot decide on how tall the doorway should be. Prince Luv-e-rest has bumped his head so many times that it will not be long before he will be a million times more forgetful than your Fairy Prince is.
Thumbelina No, I do not think that can happen. Fairy Prince just outdoes everyone. (Sigh) Maybe Forget-a-lot was washing his wings when they were handing out memory cards. The only remarkable thing is that he is the best fairy at the card game. But then, I think he is the only fairy who knows how to play.
Frog Princess You think you have got problems? Poor Briar Rose and I have far worse ones. My Prince Pucker-Lips is driving me batty with his kissing. He kisses everything but me! Just the other week, he tried to kiss a duck! The duck nearly bit off his lips. And just ask Briar Rose about her problem…
Briar Rose I sometimes wonder why they call me the Sleeping Beauty. They really should call prince Rock-a-bye the Sleeping Handsome. All His Highness does is sleep! It is terrible. Once, I was planning to go out, and had told him to watch over the castle. A soon as I had left, he drifted into Dreamland. Soon after, five thieves came and stole my favorite pillow! I never let him forget that!
Alice Thank god I do not have a prince! He would probably start redecorating Wonderland! But really ladies, it is simply a ball to have you all here this evening. We really must do this again sometime. And you will bring along your fabulous princes, won't you? Somehow, I wish I had invited them today, too!
Wicked Witch What? Did I hear the word 'invite'? First, there was Sleeping Ugly's birth ceremony, and now this stuuuupid tea party…. What is with you people? Doesn't anybody ever consider inviting the poor, old, wicked witch? So what if I poisoned Tar Black, or whom you so fondly call Snow White. Do you want to know a secret? She puts on white paint! She really is not that fair! (The others gasp in horror and whisper to one another)
Snow White That is not true! And you know it!
Wicked Witch Bah! Silence you nitwit! Well I have had enough of this poppycock! It is time I punished you peahens once and for all… I hereby curse Your Lownesses! You will no longer go back to your respective places, for I have mixed up your lovely fairytales, and you all will not know the difference! Now, be gone… for I have more mayhem to cause in other parts of the world.
(Princesses twirl out of sight while Alice, weeping, exits stage. Witch glides off in opposite direction cackling)
1.2 End of Scene I
1.3 Scene II
Narrator A scheme as wicked as this has never in the history of fairytales been hatched. What are the princesses to do? Will there be no hope for them? Are they doomed to live Unhappily Ever After? But wait! There still is hope! Why, through the help of the Fairy Godmother, of course! Don't any of you remember? She is the one who gave Cinderella that beautiful dress and those gorgeous glass slippers! Maybe she will be able to set things right.
(While the narrator is speaking, the props have been moved off and the background changed. After the paragraph is finished, the Fairy Godmother walks on stage.)
Godmother (Sitting on her chair and gazing into the crystal ball) Oh, what has that preposterous old windbag done his time? Played the old 'switcheroo' has she? Well this old fairy is not going to sit around twiddling her thumbs. I am going to set things right as soon as they reach their respective switches. The only problem is, how on earth will I know which princess is which? I have only worked for Cinderella so far. (Giggles softly) It would be nice to see how it turns out though. Goodness knows when I could do with a little laugh. Oh dear! (Walks off stage)
Narrator It is a good thing that not all fairies are evil witches! Maybe there is some hope for the princesses and their princes after all. Let us take a peek at how our royal mix-ups are faring.
1.4 End of Scene I
2 End of Act I