Our First And Final Kiss

The dark clouds in the sky soaked the world below with their tears. The rain was heavy and poured for what felt like hours. After the horrible ride to Narita and the equally haunting trip back, it felt like things couldn't get any worse. She couldn't even lift herself up enough to hope that he would be there on time, or waiting for her. It hadn't come as a surprise when she was the one waiting outside the entrance, watching the various people and smiling couples pass her by.

I shouldn't be upset…after everything, this shouldn't break me…

A few who knew her father and recognized her asked if she was waiting for someone, but they had not heard the news. She simply forced a smile and said that he would be there soon. A few commented that whoever she was waiting for was quite lucky, or other lighthearted and polite things. They were utterly and completely oblivious.

He almost never keeps his word anymore…

It hadn't taken long for everyone to disappear and for the show to start. She herself had only arrived a few minutes before the show began.

He even sounded like he was going to cancel earlier today…but I couldn't hear that right then…so I didn't let him say it.

It had been difficult to talk to him earlier. She was worried and terrified her worst fears were going to be confirmed. She didn't want to believe it was true; she didn't accept it until she saw his deathly pale face and closed eyes for herself. She knew her mother felt similarly, even though she had taken it upon herself not to break down right then and there. She knew her mother would take the tragedy worse; she had to take care of her.

He isn't going to come…and it isn't like he understands the severity of it…

But once she was alone, once she was sure he wasn't going to come, it all caught up with her. All of the pain overcame her and the tears started to overflow. The shock and the pain of learning that it was true was enough to make the tears fall, but the fact that the one she cared for so much had let her down yet ago was simply too much.

Lelouch…

Her clothes were completely soaked through and she had started to shiver from the unpleasant cold when she heard her phone ring in her bag. She finally heard footsteps approaching, but the sound only caused more tears to slip down her cheeks. She took a deep, trembling breath to try and calm herself down enough to talk to him. She had to say something.

You let me down again, but…

She waited patiently as she listened to his footsteps as they accelerated and he hurried toward her. The sound of sorrowful singing from inside the concert hall was just discernable over the patter of the rain against the ground. She didn't greet him or even look up to meet his eyes as he extended his black umbrella toward her to shield her from the rain.

But I still…

"I'm sorry I was late," he began, though as usual, his tone didn't sound particularly apologetic. He didn't offer any explanation for his absence. "I thought you'd already be back home by now."

Again and again, I…

He waited a moment for her to respond but continued when she said nothing. He most likely assumed she was only upset that he was late, and they that they had missed the show. "Anyway, never mind that. C'mon, let's go some place to get out of the rain now."

Lulu… I can't. I can't even pretend to be okay right now…not anymore…

"Lulu, tell me…," she said quietly. "Zero…he fights for the weak, doesn't he?"

Lelouch's expression seemed to change slightly at the mention of the name, but not noticeably enough for her to pay much attention to. "Wha..? Yeah, well, that's what he says."

"Then…then why did he kill my father?" she said, unable to hold the words back.

His eyes widened at the news, his expression clearly surprised. She looked up slightly, but still didn't meet his eyes. Her bangs fell around her eyes, but he could easily see the tears in her eyes. The rain, the tears of the sky, continued to fall without change, never once slowing.

"You know, my father…was so gentle," she began, her voice trembling. "He never, ever hurt me. He didn't do anything wrong. But he was buried alive…he couldn't…breathe…"

She looked up to meet his eyes, but at that moment, it never could have occurred to her that his surprise has a reason much deeper, and more sinister. The dark violet color hid an endless mosaic of secrets, lies, and sins that she didn't want to know about. She didn't want to know about them, or accept them.

"Why?" she asked hollowly. "Why did my father have to die? "I…," she stammered as her purse fell from her fingers, sending its contents scattering across the ground. "I don't want this…"

"No!" She stepped forward hurriedly and the umbrella fell from his hand. She rested her head against his shoulder as she sobbed, unable to hold the emotions back any longer. She was cold and the rain only reflected her despair, but she still felt warmer close to him. Even if he didn't keep promises, he was always there.

"Please…Lulu…," she whispered as she looked up to meet his eyes. "Help me…"

Even though in reality the moment was fleeting, time seemed to slow down for her, even if only for a moment. She closed her eyes and tilted her he upward, letting the rain wash the tears away. She leaned closer to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, more tears slipping out of her closed eyes.

He returned the embrace as their lips met. Even if it was all a grand deception, she felt at least somewhat peaceful and protected in his embrace. She never could imagine that the gentle hands that held her were actually covered in her father's blood, or that his warm lips had ordered the command that lead to her father's death.

Lulu…

He closed his eyes as the kiss deepened slowly. It was all a lie, just like everything else, but for the short time she was oblivious to it. The pain didn't fade and the memories weren't any less vibrant, but she felt solace settling over her. In his arms, the feelings couldn't be ignored.

I love you…


Author's Note: This was just a short novelization of the kiss from the first season for the Code Geass Club's War Contest on DA. :D The title is 'First And Final' because it was technically Sayoko who kissed her the second time… Poor Shirley. Kissed a girl crossdressing as the man she loves… XD