Disclaimer: I don't own True Blood, or the Southern Vampire Mysteries books. Nor do I own the song "Stay" by Sugarland.

Hope you enjoy! Please review!

Update: I was told that I can't put the lyrics to the song in this fic, even though a lot of other people do it and nothing happens to them, but I fixed it, so here's the new (crappier) version, without the lyrics.

"Stay"

I'm staring at the clock on the wall in Eric's cubby in my house. He's lying next to me, still asleep. It's getting closer and closer to the time he'll wake, so I snuggle closer and brace myself for when he wakes up.

I feel him shift slightly under me, and I look up at him to see his eyes snap open. He looks down at me and smiles, and leans down to kiss me when his phone rings. I tilt my head down so he can't see my eyes and the emotions they hide, and he picks up his phone and starts speaking Norwegian.

I close my eyes tighter. I should've known it was her.

He hangs up the phone, and squeezes me. Then he's out of the bed, and already out of the house.

I lay there with the sheets still smelling of him, and tears well in my eyes.

I slowly get up and make the bed thinking of the ways I should have asked him to stay. Why I didn't beg him to stay with me for just a little bit longer, always just a little bit longer. I tidy up his cubby, and I walk up the ladder making sure to shut the door securely behind me. I close the doors, and I lean my forehead against it, thinking of how long it will take him to come back to me, and the next time I'll be able to wake up next to him.

The anguish takes over for a minute, as I sob against the cubby's secret entrance. The fact that I love him and he's never here makes me feel like I'm dying on the inside.

I step back, straighten up, and wipe my tears away. This is not the Sookie Stackhouse that I was, and I don't think I can go back to being her ever again. Not after all that has happened, and all that I'm still going through.

I walk into the kitchen expecting Gran to be there, making dinner and on the phone with someone from church, but she's not because she died. I expect Jason to be there expecting me to make him dinner after his long day of work, but he hates vampires and since I refuse to give up Eric, he hates me, and we haven't talked in months. I expect Tara to walk down the stairs bleary eyed from taking a nap and waiting to talk to me, but she left town months ago and no one's heard a word. I'm all alone now.

I heat up some leftovers from dinner last night, and I sit at the table eating in silence, always in silence. That's all my life has been ever since I met Vampire Bill the first time. Silent.

But then after everything with him happened, and my world fell apart, Eric was there. With his snarky attitude and his bad guy façade, he made my world feel normal again. And now, months later, I am grateful that he helped me, but I wish that I didn't have to lose everything else I held dear to keep him.

The worst part is that I'm not his only keeper. Eric and Pam have an on again off again type of thing, and for the last year, they've been on again. Then he started seeing me 4 months ago, and I know that Pam has no idea. Even though Pam is a bitch, which she takes as a compliment, she doesn't deserve Eric's multiplicity. But they've had decades to work out, and they still haven't. Shouldn't I get a turn to make Eric happy? To love him as only I know how. Pam could never love him as I do.

I wish he would see that, and just pick me. I just want someone, now the only one in my life, to pick only me. Jason picked his racism over me, Bill picked power over me, Tara picked a new life over me, and I don't know what happened to everyone else, but they've taken to ignoring me and Sam fired me. I have nothing, except Eric.

I hear the phone ring later that night. I answer it, and it's Pam.

"Hey Pam."

"Sookie? Hey, I just wanted to let you know that Fangtasia is going to have a night where people can play music and perform. I know you secretly love to sing, should I sign you up?"

I almost want to burst into tears now. I hate going to Fangtasia when they're both there. His eyes follow me all night, and Pam just stands next to him watching the crowd. The worst part is when both sets of eyes are on me, and I have to leave the floor just to breathe again.

"Sookie? You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. And yeah, sign me up. It sounds like fun." I force excitement into my voice, and she hangs up on me.

I hang up my phone and sigh. What do I keep getting myself into?

I know Eric won't be back tonight. He never stays two nights in a row. So I go up to my Gran's old room that I turned into a reading/music room.

I pick up my old acoustic that my Dad got me right before he died. I strum the strings lightly, just listening to the sound. I think back to earlier tonight, and I try to summon the feelings I felt then, to try and turn them into words.

I grab the pad of paper I leave there for this purpose, and I start scribbling down words. I get the outline of a song, and then I start strumming to try and find a tune.

By the time it's dawn, and even though I knew he wouldn't be here, I feel disappointed that he isn't. But I also have the song that I'm going to sing, and I feel empowered by it. He won't know what hit him.

I wake up a little before dusk, and I start getting ready. I have to be at Fangtasia by 8 to help set up. I wear something comfortable so that I can find the courage to play this song to his face. I need to get this out, and I need him to hear.

I think of the one time I tried to ask him to stay, and he said that one day he would, and that that day was coming soon. But I could tell he was lying, and that he was a selfish bastard. But it hurts, and I need him to know that. I need him to know that I'm tired of waiting and if he doesn't make a choice soon, I'm going to make it for him.

Because it aches. My heart aches for him, and yet he keeps going back to her. Why does he think it's okay to make me feel this way? To know that he isn't mine, yet I am his. It's not fair and it hurts to share something that should be just mine.

I get into my car, and I drive to Fangtasia. I feel his eyes on me as soon as I walk in, but I go straight to Pam.

"Hey, when am I going on?" Pam doesn't even look at me she's making sure everything is perfect.

"You're up first sweetie. Go on and get set up, you have 10." She clicks away on her stilettos, as I freeze in shock. I thought I'd have a half hour or so to relax.

I feel him start towards me, and I walk to the bar instead to order a drink. I know I'm going to need it. I down it in one gulp, and I walk towards the stage, where his throne used to be. Now there's a mix of instruments and some musicians incase someone needs backup.

I nod at them, but then shake my head when they start to come over. I grab the acoustic guitar I see, and I settle on the stool.

I strum the first chord, and it wails out. Everyone looks at me, and I just smile my Crazy Sookie smile, and say, "No one tuned this." I get some chuckles and the attention fades. I tune the guitar a bit away from the microphone so I don't get the same reaction.

I'm finally ready, and I clear my throat to get Pam's attention.

She walks over and introduces the night and me. I'm getting more nervous by the minute. Maybe I should sing a different song? One that's not so close to home.

"… Sookie Stackhouse!" I hear some applause, and I feel all of the eyes on me.

I clear my throat again.

"This song is directed at a special someone. They know who they are." I see him smile in the back, and I know he thinks it's going to be a mushy love song for him. Well, that's not going to end well for him. I start to strum.

(Insert Stay by Sugarland's lyrics)

After the first verse and lead up to the first chorus, I'm singing my heart out and strumming the guitar as the tears roll down my face. I don't make eye contact with anyone, and just try to keep my eyes closed. I can't bear to see what he thinks, or what Pam thinks. I just keep going.

I accidentally make eye contact with him, and I see a blank face. A mask. A mask that could be hiding anything and everything from me. I think I see a glimmer of shock, and maybe sympathy but that could just be the reflection of a light in his eyes.

I take a deep breath, and try to find the strength to finish. I swallow the lump in throat, and I slide into the last chorus of the song.

I get a burst of applause and I set the guitar down, and run from the stage. I get outside and I just take huge gulps of air. I find myself start to settle down and I wipe the tears from my eyes.

"I didn't know you could play guitar." I hear from behind me and I freeze. I turn slowly to see him leaning against the frame of the side door I escaped from.

"My dad started to teach me before he died, and I just kept learning to try and remember him." I'm surprised my voice comes out as steady as it did considering my heart was going a mile a minute, and my stomach was full of butterflies.

He saunters towards me, and lays a hand against my heart.

"Your heart is beating fast. Are you nervous?" I'm pretty sure my heart kicked into overdrive when he touched me, and I just nod. His eyes soften, and I see my Eric again. The amnesia Eric that I fell in love with, and my eyes start to water again.

He reaches up to wipe a tear that had fallen with his thumb, and then he brushed my cheek.

"Sookie, if that is how you really felt you should've just told me. I told Pam this would happen, and all I have to do is say the word. Pam and I aren't capable of being together for too long at a time considering her preferences. And I was just waiting for you to be mine."

I look up at him and I see his eyes shining and I smile. He smiles back at me as he keeps brushing my cheek, and he leans down and we kiss.

After a moment, I lean back and just stare up at him in wonder that he's all mine now.

"Sookie. Sookie. Sookie!"

I jerk awake, and I blink bleary eyed at Jason.

"Jason? What time is it?"

"It's 3 in the afternoon, why are you still sleeping?"

"I had a long night." I smile to myself. "Where's Eric? Is he in his cubby?"

I see his face soften, and his eyes fill with pity.

"Sookie... Eric left a week ago, remember?"

My eyes widen and then it hits me. It was all just a dream.