My inspiration for this story was a moment at dance class. I watched one of my former crushes do a dance. He had so much passion, but he struggled with some of the steps. The lyrics to the song were so soft, and the piano in the background, was gentle. This story comes straight from my heart. I hope you like It

Title: Yearning

Author: Kibadelagenshin

Type: AU

Word Count: 2760

Disclaimer: I only wished I owned Naruto.

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"Sakura, why won't you look me in the eyes?", He whispered next to my ear, our cheeks brushing . My heart jumped at the simple touch, and the tickle of his breath on my face. Neji, for the seventeenth time today had me paralyzed with the smooth tone of his voice. The question within his words was so caring, so loving. I wished so much that it was genuine.

"I look you in the eyes all the time", I whispered back, with my voice barely audible, but I knew he heard me.

My hands were pressed softly against the wall above my head on either side by his larger and warmer ones. It felt as if I could easily move them, but I knew that any attempt at retreat could and would be stopped with a little force. His body pinned mine to the wall lightly in the same way his hands did. He wasn't going to let me leave without getting an appropriate response. He was a deep serious sensitive intellectual gorgeous being that was nowhere close to my level. I could never have him. I was stuck. I couldn't do anything but press my lips together and hold back my thoughts.

His chestnut hair spilled over his shoulders as the light coming from the small but sufficient windows located inches from the high ceiling let in the sound of bells from the clock tower of Konoha University campus. I felt like a freshman at the moment. Something in his voice reverted me back to my insecure days where no one saw me for what I was. I had been an out cast all because of what had happened to me. I thought time would erase the feeling.

It hadn't been my fault. At least that's what my mother told me back then. The police said that the man couldn't be found. The other kids didn't care if it was my fault or not. It's in the past now, but, it still had hurt to be ostracized for something that couldn't be stopped. Now that it was my sophomore year in college, I thought I could go without any distractions from my dance career.

"It's not the same Sakura. Your eyes don' t smile any more. " he whispered again, and then paused for a moment. He was thinking, trying to remember the past month we'd spent together. He didn't have to think hard.

"Did I make you uncomfortable?" He asked, in an innocent yet slightly guilty tone.

With his deep voice sending vibration down my spine, it would be a lie and a blatant fact to tell him that he was making me uncomfortable.

Over the month we'd been partnered by my over enthusiastic teacher. She had decided to make it her personal goal to make sure that I came out of my shy and withdrawn shell. She'd paired me with one of her best male dancers and choreographed a dance for us. At first I was in shock. I couldn't believe in all my life that I'd ever see such an artistic and well tone beautiful man in my life. He was a junior, and he looked it. He stood a head taller than me. I could rest my head in the crook of his neck I guess. He was like a Greek sculpture. They would create magnificent ideal sculptures to portray how the person wished to look in the after life instead of recording their flaws.

Neji was physically flawless. Soft skin, covering hard well toned muscles, and silky smooth hair that I could only imagined touching. But, besides those things, he was warm hearted.

It had all been going well. Neji and I had become good friends, maybe even best friends according to some people's standards. We talked about everything under the sun. Life, death, love, fun, hobbies, and I'd found out that we both played orchestra instruments in our spare time! It had been a genuine pleasure to know him, and I believe he had thought so too.

We'd been learning the seemingly innocent dance, from beginning to end. The moves were intricate and done to a very sensual song. The teacher had watched us perfect the dance and move our bodies in harmony with one another and the music. I'd watch us in the long line of mirrors and be amazed at how nicely we danced together. I'd blush at some of the bodily contact movement; like when he'd slide a hand up my leg, or hold me tight before lifting me. But it wasn't much. It was nothing that made my heart flutter too much.

The teacher had been impressed with how fast we'd learned it and decided to give us a new more intimate step. It made me uneasy. Memories of that horrible night of freshman year in high school came back to me.

The feel of Neji's hands on my, though gentle simulated the rough actions of the shadows from my past. But, when I looked into his face and saw his apologetic glance it reminded me that it was just Neji. He wouldn't hurt me. Not on purpose.

But, then the teacher had to make a suggestion that had been my personal undoing.

"Make it look more real. Connect with each other! Your supposed to be lovers, expression your compassion and desires.", she had said.

That was when Neji's apologetic grin had left, and my innocent understanding smile had vanished. I felt myself actually believing what we were doing. As we moved, I felt like I had found a special place in the universe. I was accepted by someone for once. But Neji's reactions to me never changed. He would look as if he loved me when we danced, and as if I meant everything in the world to him in one moment, then when the music stopped, it would be all technicalities.

It was supposed to be an act. Something that would have made the dance look more authentic. If we made a connection, and pretended to be lovers like the lyrics said, and as I did my lunge and triple drag turn into his arms, he would pull me close and look into my eyes, and run his finger sensually down the side of my face to my hip, and pierce me with his brown and so tender eyes. I wasn't supposed to feel anything. I was supposed to ignore his light breathing on my cheek and the feel of his hand on my side, and his hard chest against my back and the way I molded seamlessly into him, as the music supplied a gentle tone that took my heart and mind to places I wished I could go with my body and soul, but I knew I could never journey that far. Not after what had happened to me. No one could want me after that.

"No. I'm ok with the dance", I said quickly, trying to erase the saddened sound in his voice. I didn't want him to feel hurt because of my personal problems.

"Then why aren't you talking to me any more?"

"I….", words couldn't explain my thoughts at the moment. He was so close too, so warm. I turned my head away from his voice, and looked into the wall of mirrors that lined the opposite side of the studio. I saw our tangled bodies our hair intermingled.

Our eyes met in the mirror.

I don't know what he saw in my eyes, but he didn't like it. My heart seemed to make its last escape attempt from my chest at that very moment.

"I would never hurt you. Sakura." his voice was suddenly serious.

"I know you wouldn't. I trust you."

He let go of my hands. But this was only to put one arm around my waist and place one under my chin and gently turn my head so that I had no other choice but to look into his eyes. What I saw there was pure intensity. Pain, desire, anguish, curiosity, and fire; It had all been there. It was almost too much to handle. He wouldn't hurt me like I had been hurt, but, I couldn't risk it.

"Then why are you so scared of me touching you?" his hushed voice surrounded me. We were so close. I was wrapped in his heat. He smelled nice. Sort of like rain.

I was taken aback by his question; but his next question was what broke me.

"What happened to you? I know something happened to you in your past." He never broke eye contact with me, but his expression darkened as if he was bracing himself for my explanation. I knew he thought that it would be something bad, and it was. But, if I told him, he wouldn't look at me the same. Just like the way the kids back in high school had shunned me.

"You wouldn't look at me the same if I told you. Besides, it's nothing for you to worry about. I'm fine, trust me. ", my voice was squeaky and high pitched. I tried so desperately hold back the flood water of tears welling up in my tear ducts. But, the way he was looking at me, and how close he was holding me. It led to a huge conclusion. I think I might just love Neji.

"It's too late for that, I'm already worried." His firm voice told me he wasn't lying.

"Nothing could change the way I think about you. You mean so much to me Sakura. Why won't you believe it.", he looked so disheartened and pained as he said these words to me. I couldn't take it. I moved my chin back to the mirrors before he could do anything about it. I put my hands on his chest to try to separate myself from him and his intoxicating heat.

I closed my eyes and rested my head against the wall, not wanting to see my reflection.

I felt the tears slide from beneath my closed eyelids. I sobbed lightly; I could feel his hold on me tighten if that was even possible at this point. My chest constricted. I made a decision. I would tell him. I moved my arms slowly to his back and crossed them. He was my physical brace. I needed him.

He waited silently for me to tell him.

"It was freshman year." I whispered, my voice was shaky ." I had missed the last bus, so I decided to hang out in my favorite teachers' room. It was usually empty. I liked to think by myself back then. I was carefree, and careless. I got in trouble often, but it was never anything big. I was just known for my stupid little pranks. "

"Mr. Gendosa stopped me in the hall on the way. He was the all feared dean of discipline that just never left me alone. Everything I ever did, he'd give me a detention. He was tall older and smelly. I told him that I was just going two doors down, but he wouldn't listen to me. He told me to follow him. He said I needed a hall pass. I considered ditching him and getting in trouble for it later. I should have just done that." I chuckled humorlessly.

"Well, the office was closed, so I told him he could give me a demerit, and call it a day, but, he wouldn't have it. That's when he took me into a class room and started to yell at me. I ignored him, because he always yelled at me for doing stupid things. But" I paused to swallow. "He grabbed me and slammed me into the closest cabinet. I tried to scream, but, my throat had gone dry." I had to stop for a moment. This was hard for me.

I could feel Neji tense. It seemed like he didn't want to hear what was next, but, he stayed quiet. He was listening.

"He started to kiss me. I was so confused. I'd imagined my first kiss being soft and loving, with soft eyes and gentle hands. But he was just grabbing me, and moaning and doing strange things to me. I cried, I begged him not to do anything else. But nothing I said would stop him. He took my innocence that day."

The Campus bells rang again out side.

" He hadn't stayed long after that. I had to get out of there, so I dressed quickly and made it onto the bus. It had been raining that day. My mother took me to the doctor, and the police where called. Mr. Gendosa had already skipped town. It took two weeks to figure out if I was pregnant or not. I was fine though."

My expression darkened. "It took me a while to get over it. It didn't help that every body and there friends had heard about it and decided to deem me the ultimate teachers pet." I gave an emotionless laugh at the little nickname. It was clever.

"They had all said it was my fault."

"It wasn't your fault Sakura." Neji spoke for the first time.

"Then who's fault was it! I shouldn't have been wandering around by myself. I should have been stronger. I was so stupid back then. I'm such an.."

"Stop it! None of it was your fault." The swift sound of his voice brought me back to reality.

"Sakura, the only thing that matters is that you're ok, you made it home. You mustered the strength to get on the bus. You actually told your mother about it. That takes so much strength to do." He rested his forehead on mine and closed his eyes. I wished he would kiss me.

"You told me. Thank you. You don't have to worry about ever being judged again. Not as long as I'm around." He said quietly. His hair poured over my shoulders.

I didn't know what to say. All of a sudden, all of my thoughts became words that I couldn't express. Had he really just freed me? I felt so light, so utterly weightless. I felt so blissful. My eyes started to tear again, but, I felt a smile tug at the corners of my lips.

As if life couldn't get any better, Neji opened his eyes and leaned forward so that our lips just barely touched.

He whispered delicately against my lips. "I love you Sakura, Nothing could ever change the way I think about you."

Then, he kissed me. I wasn't surprised. Any one with common sense could have seen it coming. But, that sensitive brush of skin was so explosive. My insides felt like they were on fire. My face grew warm. It was as if my thoughts were run-on sentences. So many things had ended today. My doubts and insecurities were gone. But, something new had started.

I moved my hands to the back of his head and pulled his lips tighter against mine. I nibbled his lower lip and he elicited a sound of appreciation from the back of his throat. We pulled apart. Our breathing filled the air. I couldn't look away from him.

"Thank you" I whispered breathlessly.

The sound of keys in the door made me rip my eyes away from his. It dawned on me what time it was. Three bells had rung. The class was about to burst through the doors any second now. My eyes went wide.

"Crap!"

Neji's voice was so smooth and calm . It felt almost like he was mocking me. "Calm down Sakura."

"How are you so calm about this? The choreographer is gonna go crazy! She'll think we did unthinkable things in here and then she'll kick us out! I like dancing Neji! I wanna stay here!"

I saw his eyes fill with mirth, and I couldn't believe it.

"Stop laughing at me!"

He kissed me on the forehead and we untangled from one another.

"Go turn on the radio, and start the routine. I'll just say we came in early to practice." he kissed me and gave me a playful smile. I smiled back feeling better than I have in ages.

I did what he had asked me to, and everything went smoothly. The teacher asked us to show her what we worked on.

I pressed play on the radio and got into the first position.

This time our dance wouldn't just be counts and beats like it had been before.

This time, it would be real.

Fin

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I hope you enjoyed it. Tell me what you thought.

Kiba.