3/5/10
Graduation Day, The Promise.
We were on the rooftop of the school, Makoto and I. We knew we should've been downstairs in the auditorium to see Akihiko-san and Mitsuru-san graduate but what would be the point? No one remembers that we were all friends or what we did together. The only two that remember are Makoto and I.
For the past year, we had been fighting these things called "shadows",
Monster's that feed off of a human's mind. They would only appear during the dark hour, which was a hidden hour between 12:00 and 1:00 AM. An hour that should never have, and now no longer exists.
All because of Makoto.
We fought in Tartarus, a seemingly never-ending Labyrinth that stretched into the sky. But at daytime it was Gekkoukan High School, a school we all attended.
Just recently, we fought Nyx, The mother of all shadows and one which cannot be defeated. She wanted to bring forth what was known as "the fall" which was the extinction of all life on this planet. Our mission: Annihilate Nyx.
Although we were not successful in our mission, Makoto somehow managed to overpower her and prevent the fall.
It's been a month since then.
I was sitting down on a bench with Makoto, he seemed tired, and so I let him rest his head on my lap. We were having a nice conversation when I started to realize something was wrong. He started to look pale and his breath weakened. I didn't want to say anything that would cause him to worry since he looked so calm and peaceful resting on me. But I had a feeling he already knew; perhaps he didn't want me to worry either.
I took note that Makoto was starting to less often speak, his answers were becoming shorter and so I decided to revert the attention away from what I knew was happening by talking about something else.
"The wind feels so nice…" I said as I looked at nothing in particular. I wanted to look anywhere but at his pale pained face.
"This is my first time experiencing spring." I added with a smile. He didn't reply though.
"But, this season will eventually pass…"
I looked down at Makoto's face, and my fears became reality. His lips were starting to turn into a lilac color and he looked as if he was struggling to stay awake. But I continued to speak,
"After fighting alongside you and facing the world's end…I finally began to understand… what it means to live…"
He smiled at that.
"Thinking for yourself… Not running away… accepting the inevitable…" I looked at the city in the distance and smiled sadly,
"All things eventually come to an end… Every living thing will one day disappear…"
I felt him nod his head but I didn't dare look at him.
"Only by accepting this can one discover what they truly want… what the meaning of their life will be…"
"I understand now why I was so tormented by my lack of strength. Protecting others became more than just an order I had to obey. I wanted to do it for my own reasons…"
"I realized this once I decided to try and prevent the fall. When I thought I might never see you again, something else became clear to me—what I wanted most. And so I made up my mind."
I looked down at Makoto once again and smiled,
"I decided that I would continue to protect you."
"I want to be your strength. I know I'm not the only one who can do this… but that's okay."
My eyes started to feel weird… My vision started to blur as I felt something moist trickle down my face.
What is this…?
Am I crying…?
"My life will be worth living if it's for this reason… Thank you…"
"It'll be okay…" I heard him say as he caressed my cheek and wiped my tears away. He let his hand linger on my face for a moment longer. It reassured me, the fact that he was still in condition to speak.
"You're right. What am I doing?" I said as I tried to fight back my tears. Why am I crying? "I understand now, so I should be happy…"
All of a sudden we are interrupted by voices cheering in the distance. Was that… Junpei-kun…?
"Everyone…I realize now that I have friends as well."
I look up at the clear blue sky and smile to myself,
"You don't have to save the world to find meaning in life… Sometimes, all you need is something simple, like someone to take care of."
"I'll keep on living no matter what. So that I can protect you…"
I looked down at Makoto and gave him a gentle smile, he was smiling as well but his eyes… he looked like he was in a daze but then he looked right at me.
"Thank you…" I said, feeling my eyes warm up again as a fresh set of tears started to head its way down my face.
It's time.
We both know it.
"You must be tired… Please get some rest… I'll stay right here with you…" I told him as I brushed his hair out of his eyes. The loud cheery voices were starting to get louder.
"Soon, all your friends will be here by your side..." I added with a smile.
For a moment, he didn't do anything. He just stared at me with a serious expression. It worried me for a second, but then he smiled as well.
"Okay, Aigis." Is all he said, and then he closed his eyes.
I wanted to stop him…
I wanted to shake him awake and make sure he never closed his eyes again…
I-I wanted him to stay awake for a little longer but… I-I just… I just couldn't believe it… I couldn't believe myself. I let him slip through my fingers so easily…
No…
No… That isn't quite right…
It's that… he was never mine to hold on to…
I promised I would protect him! And now I—
"Hey Aigis! Makoto!" I heard someone call out suddenly, distracting me from the abundant amount of dread that has recently been brought upon myself. I looked in the direction of the source and saw Junpei and everyone else. My heart stopped.
What do I tell them…?
What would I tell them…?
What is there to tell them…?
"We remember everything now!" Ken exclaimed in excitement, I just smiled sadly as my tears began to run down faster.
It truly is amazing that they can remember…
"What's wrong Aigis?" Asked Akihiko-San, with concern,
"What happened to the ceremony?" I asked not answering his question but hoping to divert the attention away from myself,
I plastered a fake smile,
"Oh c'mon Aigis! Forget about the ceremony! We have a celebration to get started!" Junpei yelled excitedly, throwing his fists up in the air for emphasis.
"Hold on Junpei…" Akihiko put his hand on Junpei's shoulder to calm him down, "Aigis, what's wrong?"
I still didn't answer his question; instead I looked down at the floor and wiped my eyes, just then, Koromaru-San ran over to where I sat with Makoto resting on my lap and gave Makoto a couple of sniffs.
Dogs always seem to know when something is wrong with its master.
Koromaru-San rubbed his face against Makoto's dangling hand and started to whimper loudly.
"What's wrong with Koromaru and Makoto-San?" Ken asked me unsuspectingly,
It's all my fault…
"Hey! Who said he could doze off at a time like this? Dude! Now's not the time for sleeping that's what class is for!" Junpei cried as he walked over to where Makoto's body lay, right on my lap,
"C'mon dude get up!" he said as he tried to shake him awake, of course Makoto remained unresponsive and so Junpei tried to shake him even harder, I then grabbed his hand and stopped him,
"Don't." I managed to choke out through my silent sobs,
Everyone looked surprised at my sudden behavior.
"Aigis-San…?" I heard Fuuka say my name and suddenly everything became silent,
"Aigis what happened?" Akihiko-San asked me once again for what I believe is the third time; he was starting to sound impatient.
I remained silent,
"Aigis! What in the world is going on?!" He yelled this time; I blinked back in surprise by his sudden temper-loss,
"Akihiko! Now's not the time to be yelling!" Mitsuru-San told Akihiko-San with a stern voice, "Something is obviously wrong and losing your temper is not going to fix things."
Akihiko-San looked shocked for a moment by the way Mitsuru-San spoke to him but then nodded and looked at the ground ashamed,
"Now Aigis, I would like for you to tell us exactly what happened."
All eyes were on me again,
"It is best that we do not try to wake him up." I tell them flatly, which causes some eyebrows to raise up in question,
"What are you talking about? How're we suppose to celebrate with him sleeping like that! He'll miss the whole thing!" says Yukari gesturing a hand at Makoto's resting body.
As far as they know.
"Ha-ha— She probably just doesn't want him to move from her lap, ain't that right Aigis?" Junpei said teasingly as he nudged me in the shoulder with his elbow,
"I-I…" I stammered, unknowing of what to say to that, I look over at Yukari, who seemed to be staring at me with a sour expression, she then looks over at Makoto and walks over,
"Well I don't know about the rest of you, but I think it's about time we woke him up."
"Yukari I really think—"
"Aigis! He's MY boyfriend, not yours!" Yukari yelled, I just blinked back at her, shocked,
She's right…
Yukari started to shake Makoto awake softly but nothing happened,
She tried again with a little more force but again nothing happened,
It's just a painful reminder…
I let this happen…
I let him close his eyes…
"Makoto, come on wake up, everyone's here." Yukari said as she continuously tried to wake him up,
Still nothing.
"Huh…? Makoto wake up!" she began to shake him harder, I wanted to stop her.
"Sheesh Makoto, you sure are a heavy sleeper!"
Yukari then got a good look at Makoto's face…
"Eep!" she cried and jumped back in horror, that alarmed everyone,
"Takeba! What's wrong?" Mitsuru asked right away,
"H-he's—"
Unable to take the mystery anymore, Akihiko-San runs over to us and takes a look at Makoto's face as well,
"What the…?"
He looked up at me,
"Aigis what happened?!" he cried out in concern,
Everyone else ran over to see how bad the damage was as well,
They all gasped,
"Makoto-San…"
I couldn't take it anymore.
I burst into wails… crying even harder then before.
…But it doesn't make sense… I'm a machine, an Anti-shadow suppression weapon; I'm not supposed to cry…
And here I am…
I'm not supposed to love either…
But I love Makoto…
I love him so much…
No, he's not here anymore…
I "loved" him.
As in past tense…
I wanted to protect him…
But I couldn't…
The tears seemed to never stop.
I felt Mitsuru-San's hand on my back as she rubbed me in comfort… I appreciated the gesture… but…
Nothing will ever comfort me.
I let Makoto die.
"We need to get help!" I heard Yukari cry out in panic,
"Junpei! Take his arms; I'll grab his legs. We need to take him to the nurse. Now!" Akihiko called out to Junpei to follow his orders,
"But Mr. Edogawa is in the auditorium with all the teachers for the graduation ceremony." Junpei pointed out,
"And? I don't care! Grab his arms! Hurry!"
"Aye-Aye!" Was all that Junpei said as he grabbed Makoto's arms like he was ordered to and the both of them carried Makoto down the stairs to the auditorium,
This was all my fault…
I let this happen…
Soon we reached the auditorium and Junpei and Akihiko burst through the double doors loudly, causing a huge commotion making the principal pause in the middle of his speech.
"Someone help us! This student needs medical attention!" Akihiko cried out in desperation as him and Junpei set Makoto down on the floor and a flood of students and teachers surrounded his sickly pale body.
The first one to gasp was a brunette girl wearing a pair of glasses, I've seen her walking home from school with Makoto plenty of times before, I believe her name is 'Chihiro Fushimi,' she cupped her mouth as she stared down at Makoto's body in horror.
I looked around and saw another stunned student, a male; I believe that we are from the same class. He had light brown hair and brown eyes, another friend of Makoto's. His name was 'Kenji Tomochika'
A few more of Makoto's friends surrounded him but they were all completely speechless.
I was the cause of this…
This feeling of shock…
Of depression…
Of distress…
Of fear…
Mr. Edogawa; the nurse quickly emerges from the crowd and kneels down beside Makoto.
"What's the situation?" He asked as he did a once over glance at him.
"We don't know, he just wont wake up." Junpei said as he shifted from his right and left leg nervously.
"Won't wake up…?" The male nurse raised his eyebrow, questioningly. "Then exhaustion is merely the case.
"An exhausted person can still be woken up!" Akihiko yelled out in anger at the nurse's ignorance.
"He could be a heavy sleeper." Mr. Edogawa added, shrugging his shoulders.
"Dude! Look at his color! He's sickly pale!" Junpei yelled this time out of frustration. I do admit that this nurse is not helping.
"Are you going to check him or not?" Ken yelled at the nurse as well,
"I see." Mr. Edogawa says and takes a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair.
A whole minute passes.
"Well? Aren't you going to do something?!" Yukari cried out, her voice squeaked as her emotions overtook her.
"There's not much I can do if I don't know how it happened. Who was with him at the time?" Mr. Edogawa asked as he applied his index and middle finger to Makoto's neck and wrist. I believe that that is the act of 'checking one's pulse'
Everyone immediately looked at me.
"Do you know something about this Aigis?" Mr. Edogawa asks me, not once taking his eyes off of the body lay out in front of him.
I let a moment pass before answering,
"He… He was tired… so I… let him rest on my lap." I answered truthfully, looking at the ground with guilt.
"I see…" The male nurse answered, not asking any further questions although I was expecting him to.
He continues to examine Makoto's body and after a few minutes of tense silence, he looks up at everyone,
"Although… this area is beyond my field of expertise, I do know one thing for sure, I'm very sorry to say this but…" Mr. Edogawa trailed off making the suspense unbearable.
Although I already know what the answer is.
"He's been dead for a while."
This caused a huge commotion.
Gasps…
Cries…
Screams…
This all came from fellow classmates…
All I could think about… was…
How this was all of my fault…
"What're you talking about?" Akihiko cried out in disbelief by what Mr. Edogawa just said, "How long?"
Mr. Edogawa sighed before answering; I could tell he was just as upset as we were.
"Judging by his body temperature and his change of skin color…"
My breath was caught in my throat.
"It's been more than twenty-four hours."