A/N: this is strictly a oneshot. It came to me during my lunch break so I wrote that shit down. Anyway, hope you like it.
I can pinpoint the exact moment she turned my entire life upside down. She didn't do it on purpose, and she didn't even know it had happened. Love is a tricky landscape to navigate. It wasn't love at first sight. She slowly and surely, without intending to, chipped away at the walls surrounding my heart. She left me exposed and defenseless. I realized as I watched her swing back and forth on the swing set, her long dark hair blowing in the cool autumn breeze, that I was completely and irreversibly in love with her and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it. Her smile made my entire day. As I stood there, my heart beating wildly in my chest, I knew that I would never be the same again. Her laughter intoxicated me. She was a drug that I would never be able to quit. I was addicted. Everything about her was perfect. She was my everything.
As we walked down the sidewalk, her fingers entwined with mine I can't help but feel complete. I wish I could tell her. I wish I could whisper into her ear those three words that could reach her heart and make her mine forever. I can't though. Its too late. They will simply get filed away with the rest of the things I'll never say. Sometimes when she looks at me, it's almost as if her eyes are begging me to say them. I never do and I never will. I feel her lean her head against my shoulder as we walk. It's a natural and common occurrence for her.
When we reach the front steps of her house, she pulls me in for a hug. I wrap my arms around her and I hold her like my life depends on it. I know she can feel it, her heart beats rapidly against my own. She knows. She knows what I won't say. She knows what I couldn't say. As I pull away she brings her hands up to my face and rests her forehead against mine. Neither one of us speaks. I study her face as we stand there. She has her eyes closed. She is so beautiful. I cover her hands with mine, resting on her left hand is the reason I will never tell her how I feel. The cold metal and diamonds, a harsh reminder that she will never be mine. She married him three years ago. He was a good man and he treated her well. He had the courage to do what I never could. Open up to her.
As we say goodbye, her eyes beg me to come inside. It takes everything I have not to surrender. It breaks my heart. I know that if I walk into that house, she will break every vow she ever made. I can't do that to her. I love her for everything that she is. She is pure and beautiful. I would never forgive myself if I corrupted her. She would let me do it. I can see it in her eyes. I swallow the lump in my throat as I turn and walk away. It's better this way. I'm too late.
I can feel her watching as I walk away. It's always hard. The part where I walk away. I've never been able to get used to it. I hear her call my name. I don't want to stop, but I do. I feel myself turn around to face her. She walks over to me, her eyes full of questions that I simply cannot answer. She takes my hand and places it over her heart. "Do you feel that?" She whispers. I can't speak so I nod. "It's yours. It always has been." She says before turning around and walking away. My hand feels cold as it drops down to my side. I don't follow her, I can't. I watch as she walks into her house. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. It takes me a few moments before I can convince my legs to move. As I walk away, I took one last look behind me. I swear if you look closely, the remnants of my shattered heart litter the sidewalk where we stood moments before.