A/N: Uggghh, another stupid thing I churned out. I hope you like it. Or not. Oh and cookies and a request fic to whoever guesses the pairing. I wanted to try something sadistic so twisted romance worked for me.

Warning: Slash

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note.

To Please the Gods

Do you not see how we are alike, my pretty, pretty thing?

Yet, you are a criminal, I am serving for justice.

I am merely pleasing my God.

I, too have a God to please. How do you serve yours?

I am to be the perfect case for him to crack, the perfect mystery, if you wish.

You take lives.

You too take them, you squander their breathes and gamble their blood. I am bolder; I serve my God by announcing my existence. That alone is enough.

You are a felon.

You have no right to call me what you are.

I have every right.

I shall disregard that.

Then so shall I.

Must you work whilst we chat?

I must to please my God.

Then do tell me the next time you are free. I would like to take you along on one of own montages.

I will not participate in such acts of larceny.

My dear sweet bird, you have me confused. Material items is not what I desire, it is lives for the taking. Do come, it gives you quite the thrill to witness firsthand what you do everyday from the comfort of your dark dimly lit office.

Then perhaps, if time bides me able to do so. But I will only come if you destroy criminals.

It is my choice, sweet bird, I will let you choose the subject of my next pickings if you desire. But I have not done so in quite a while. I would like the extra thrill.

I shall see.

It will be worth it.

Mm. I have completed my task.

Then you wish me to leave?

No, I was merely stating my progress.

So it is. Tell me, have you seen your God? Met him face to face? Questioned his authority yet gazed in awe at his works?

I have not.

You will someday, my dear sweet bird. When that time comes, you may question your loyalty. But remember, we are both dangerously obsessed, our Gods are mere mortals yet they tower over us like heavenly being. They are perfect, they are whole, they are.

I know.

Have you gazed upon his name? Toying upon each mere letter, gleefully acknowledging the fact that you know his true self. You and only you.

I have not.

I am sorry for you my dear sweet bird. Such a pretty face, such perfect skin, such gorgeous eyes. They have never been graced by the presence of the God whom you worship and love. These slender fingers have never reached out in hope of caressing even the shoes that grace your God's feet. You have not experienced the moment when you shy away from the touch you so long for. Your face is known by your God, but you do not know his. Your eyes have not gazed upon the beauty that is your perfect God, your savior, his perfect name.

I weep in knowledge that all you have said is true.

Do not fret my sweet bird, your time will come. You will then be able to serve your God, side by side, everyday. He will smile at you, and you will feel blessed to just be able to bask in his presence.

Have you experienced all this?

Sadly, my God is much different than your God. He smiles in contempt at my achievements. He mocks my questioning gaze. When I strive to please him, he weeps. He tells me I am not adequate. I am not good enough. But he does not understand. I am the best. Even better than him. But I will express my devotion to my God through my own way. And soon he will be forced to understand that I am.

I too pity you, you have not felt loved by your God, but I know mine appreciates me. He acknowledges my existence. He has spoken to me with concealed joy.

I need not your pity, my God will understand soon.

And I, you, my God will meet me soon.

Do you realize our Gods hate each other?

Yes, I am aware. What of?

This puts us in quite a bit of a muddle doesn't it, my sweet bird?

Ah yes, but of which can be solved. You see, I will never love anyone more than my God.

I too, so what we have-

-Is reserved for us alone. It is not permanent. And the moment our Gods command us to-

-We will not hesitate to destroy the other. Yes. The agreement has been established.

Good, now, if you please, could you not use the knife this time?

Why not? It is so much more fun.

I'm not in the mood.

I see, but don't you know, my sweet? Even though you have vowed to love your God, and I, mine, you belong to me. And I can do whatever I want to what's mine.

You- Fine, but not too hard this time.

My sweet bird, don't you know the only one who can order me around is my God?

You barely listen to him.

I know.

The End

A/N: Too offending? I know. Had to get it out. It was a 40 minute thing, I think. Need. To. Do. Homework.

Please review. And remember kids, worshipping is a healthy obsession that will end you up in the mental hospital. Oh and there's a reminder for the request fic to whoever guesses the pairings. It's so obvious. And after someone guesses it, I'll put it out on the summary page.