Playing the Adult
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters are the property of Tsugumi Ohba, Takeshi Obata, and Viz Media. I don't own them; I'm just examining all their possibilities.
Author's Note: This was an entry for the theme "Skin" at DN Contest at LiveJournal.
April 17, 1998
Berlin
It took Watari a few full seconds to comprehend exactly what he was looking at. What was going on was obvious though the individuals involved, especially one thin, black-haired teenager in particular, was a little harder to comprehend.
Watari slowly turned over his cell phone and put it on his desk; the image on the small screen was making him ill by the second. He wanted to just turn the phone off, chuck it out a window, anything that would wipe what he was seeing off the screen.
He took a few breaths, his gut-reaction wearing down and some reason setting in.
He couldn't disconnect immediately, L's safety might still be in jeopardy; as much as it sickened him to look back at the screen, he had to in order to make sure his ward was indeed safe in such a scenario.
It was concern for L's safety that led him to this moment, a moment that he was thinking was the result of his own panic and instinctive over-protective nature for L.
He had watched over L since he was eight-years-old; a small child with intelligence and maturity that surpassed most middle-aged men. Watari had related to him like both a father-figure and a peer, watching out for him and tending to his needs. More often than not, however, he more following his lead than guiding him.
That was 10 years ago and little had changed other than the obvious. L had obviously grown physically and mentally in the past decade; his instincts were more attuned and he had become more wary to the ways of the world.
Watari had assumed that adolescence for him was only the usual physical changes and less of a need to watch over him every second of the day. He was a young adult now with much more autonomy. It was, however, almost as if the same personality matured though all other aspects practically remained the same.
Watari cautiously picked up his phone, mentally berating himself for thinking a scene like this was impossible for L. He was an 18-year-old man, after all and had the same urges as any man his age would. Even for a shy, highly intelligent young man, something like this was still only natural.
L was now an adult and Watari had been encouraging him to act more as such since he was 16. While L thought nothing of doing direct undercover work, getting him to actually go out for social or even personal enjoyment was a monumental effort though he had been doing that a bit more in recent years.
When L told him two hours ago that he needed to get out for a while, maybe walk around Potsdamer Platz and check out a few cafes, Watari simply gave him a wave and thought nothing of it.
Normally it wouldn't be an issue, though the issue started with some late-breaking developments in the case they were investigating in Berlin at the time; one of L's main connections who could blow the lid off a Russian mob sleeper cell was just arrested on fraud charges, a development that could lead to the silence of said key witness. Nothing could be done about the situation until the next morning, yet Watari knew L would want to know about this development immediately.
One unanswered phone call was mildly annoying. Another unanswered call ten minutes later was even more disconcerting, though a third ten minutes after that was becoming cause for concern. Watari hung up the fourth time and was officially worried.
L always answered his phone by the second ring and the only time he missed a call was if he was in the middle of an interrogation. No matter where he was, the antenna was always at its strongest signal, the long-lasting battery had had its annual recharge just a few days ago, and the phone could not be turned off.
A fifth missed call meant something was wrong.
Watari decided he wouldn't blame himself for what action he took next, though knew that thought would change the moment he turned his phone back over and was reminded of what he would ultimately discover.
Watari could track the location of L's phone with a GPS feature on his own phone. A few pressed buttons later his stomach dropped; L's phone was in a hotel several blocks away from the one they were staying in.
In a best case scenario, L was working on another case or had a lead on this one. Watari didn't even want to think of the worst case scenario, though that was what led him to activate another feature between his and L's phones.
It was a feature he felt uncomfortable using unless it was an obviously dire emergency, which this scenario could well have been. With another few keystrokes, he could remotely activate the camera in L's phone to feed images back to him. If he saw the inside of a deep pocket, it was not a large issue; the inside of a box or on a street somewhere meant something was truly wrong.
Watari didn't expect what he would see on his screen a minute later.
The camera turned on, showing the bottom of what looked like a bed. A pan up revealed stylishly long strawberry-blond hair on a young man of about 20 that Watari did not recognize. Another pan back showed the man on his hands and knees on the bed completely unclothed; a set of slender hands on his shoulders.
Watari panned the lens back as far as it would go to see the second man before feeling ill and pulling the phone away from is sight.
He had to look down again; this one image could not have been telling the whole story.
Watari pried his wrist to turn the phone over and look at the image unfolding on the screen, making a mental point that he was just going to look for anything obviously suspicious, that was all; he was not indeed prying no matter how much his instinct told him otherwise.
His eyes managed to wander to the image of L's entirely bare form. His pale skin was unmarred by bruises, cuts, or any other physical indication he had been forced into this situation.
L's facial expressions were of someone in the middle of an act like this; face relaxed, eyes closed, mouth occasionally opening. He looked like he was going through a routine, though a somewhat pleasing one.
His companion looked less amused, though his expression was more akin to boredom than violation; another one of Watari's concerns cleared. This other man had the typical body language of someone rendering services than someone engaged in true intimacy; which shed some more light on what was going on.
Watari scanned the background, seeing the fine draperies and carved wood bed post of a high-end hotel room. No one else was in the room and the sheets on the bed were not even unturned; L and his companion were simply doing this in the most convenient location.
He pulled the phone away from his sight again, though the thought of pressing the button to disconnect the feed was lost amid a thousand other thoughts.
Watari wanted to be angry with L, but the only thing he could really be cross with him for was not answering his phone in a timely manner. Should he be sad to see this then, maybe truly offended by his behavior? Watari knew of nothing there that truly offended him.
He had never engaged in homosexual relations himself, though had seen enough in his travels so that hardly bothered him. If L had hired a prostitute, it wasn't as if Watari had never done that in his younger days either; in fact he spent much money on escorts during any leave time he got in the Army…when he was around 18 himself.
L was in a similar situation; a young man traveling abroad and sowing his wild oats. L's vices were positively tame in comparison with other international detectives and spies.
There was one thing that made what L was doing different from anything Quillish Wammy had ever done; Quillish was now the guardian of a young man doing said action. Yes he was now an adult, though he was in more of a sensitive position than most young men.
Ultimately it all came down to him seeing this young man bare before him. Watari was seeing more of him than just his naked flesh; he was seeing a person developing a private life; a private life he had barged into and seen more of than he should have.
Watari slowly turned the phone over to see L hop off the bed and land on his feet; turning away from the direct view of his ward fully unclothed. He was about to disconnect then, though his detective instincts wanted him to see how this story ended.
L was now out of view of the camera and the other man flopped to his side. L's hand briefly was visible down in the direction of the camera, a pair of jeans coming into view. His other hand reached into a pocket and pulled what looked like small wad of Euros, which he gave to the other man; answering Watari's question.
A second later, the hand reached down again and the view from the camera turned upward and onto L's face. Watari saw one suspicious glance into the camera before he pressed the button at last severing the connection.
Watari tossed the phone on the bed next to his desk and gave a hard sigh. He felt disgusting. Ultimately he had just completely pried into his ward's private life; that was the feeling that bothered him most of all.
His elbows rested on the desk and he rested his chin in his hands trying to feel less uncomfortable than he did now.
The phone rang a moment later, causing Watari to briefly jump in surprise. He stood up from his desk and reached down to the phone, flipping it open once more; it was the call he wanted to receive though now he could barely press the green button.
He took a deep breath and pressed the button, holding the phone to his ear and saying his usual polite "Yes."
"Watari," a familiar voice said on the other end, a voice that Watari realized was deep and mature; not the voice of the little boy he once knew. "I only now realize that you have made several attempts to call me. I truly apologize for not answering sooner."
Watari tried to hold back his sigh, though it came out in all its annoyed glory.
"Yes, I did attempt to call you," Watari said in a stern tone. "To be quite frank I was becoming rather worried. You are usually better about receiving your calls than this."
Silence was the only thing that came from the other end, though Watari could hear L's stiff breathing, followed by a sigh.
"Watari, you know where I was don't you," L said. "And my indication came from my own phone. I only ask you to be honest."
It was Watari's turn for an uncomfortable pause. L had seen the position of the tiny lens on the camera; a detail too small for anyone to notice on one glance, though L's natural attention to detail would not miss that.
"I understand the nature of your work, though we need to be completely honest with each other," he said. "Yes, I know where you were, but it is none of my business. I can only hope you are being responsible in what you do."
L gave another long sigh.
"Understood and agreed," L said, "though I believe this is a conversation best picked up later. Am I to assume your call had to do with the case at hand?"
"Yes, there has been a new development which I also think is best shared when you return here," Watari said.
"Understood," L said.
"And one more thing," Watari hastily added before L had any chance to hang up, though his voice caught in the back of his throat.
"What is it," L asked.
"I do just want you to know before you return that I have no judgment to pass on anything," Watari said, managing a lighter, if not clumsier tone than before, "and I ask if anything is on your mind that you let me into your confidence."
Another pause came from the other end, though Watari could not hear any sighs or tense breaths.
"Completely understood," L said, his tone even though somewhat relieved.
The line clicked off. Watari looked down at the phone for a moment before casually putting it beside his computer on his hotel room desk.
He would tell L the new developments on the case, before leading him into a conversation about both acceptance and personal responsibility. Watari rehearsed everything he would say in the next hour in his head
Ultimately he had to play the adult. L was 18 now; still an intellectual genius and still the world's top detective, though still a young man in need of guidance.
Watari still had to tell himself that repeatedly; maybe someday those words would make more sense.