A/N: This is pure crack. Don't take it seriously, please. I don't know what compelled my screwed up mind to come up with something like this, but it did. On the other hand, this is one of my first attempts at humor. So tell me how I did…through REVIEWS. Please?
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
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Saturday morning, Rock Lee and Lady Tsunade were standing in one of Konoha Hospital's sterile white operation rooms. Lee was still in his typical green spandex jumpsuit, and Tsunade was brandishing a white plastic discardable hospital gown.
"Change into this while I go and prepare some of the instruments for the surgery. I'll be back in ten minutes." She tossed the gown at him, and swiftly walked out the door.
It seemed, although Tsunade was supposed to be one of the greatest ninja ever, and a top notch medical expert…she had forgotten that in his current crippled state, he wasn't able to change by him self. Struggle as he might, Lee couldn't peel off his spandex and pull on the gown. It just wasn't possible, with a leg and an arm crushed. Nevertheless, Lee did not give up.
I see; it is training! He thought diligently.
So, ten minutes came and passed, filled with hapless struggling and a very violent plastic white discardable non-living hospital gown.
When the time was up, Tsunade strode back into the room followed by Shizune.
"Lee, why is that gown not on?" Tsunade asked snappishly.
"I am sorry, but I cannot get it on." He said, striking one of his various socially embarrassing poses.
"Damn it, Lee! Just change into the hospital gown already! I have to start the operation pronto!" A rather agitated Tsunade snapped.
"But I cannot!" Lee exclaimed.
Tsunade frowned, and gave him a glare with her lips pursed in agitation.
"I see." She turned to her assistant. "Shizune! Get him changed." She was obviously annoyed.
"Hai, Lady Tsunade."
Shizune approached Lee, and began to unzip his spandex jumpsuit. He swatted her hand away.
"No! You mustn't!" he exclaimed.
Tsunade rolled her eyes.
"Look. I just want to get this operation over with." She tapped her foot impatiently. "Lee, I don't care if you're wearing boxers or briefs. I am a medical specialist. I swear won't laugh at you if you wear a jockstrap." Oh yes, Tsunade was very annoyed.
Lee felt his face burn up in embarrassment. He mumbled something unintelligible.
"Shizune, carry on." Tsunade ordered.
"Hai." Shizune began to unzip his jumpsuit again. He gave a squeak, and slapped her hand away. Tsunade rolled her eyes, and muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like, 'After this, I'm going to need to find a gambling hall…' Shizune sent her a disapproving look.
"Lee, we can't start the operation if you aren't in the hospital gown. Please, if you would just let me help you—" Shizune began.
"That does it! We're running late!" Tsunade held the gown in one hand, and pulled the jumpsuit off Lee, intent on forcing the sterile gown on.
His face turned redder than before.
Shizune and Tsunade both covered their eyes…
"Oink-oink…" TonTon groaned.
"I'm…sorry Lee…I didn't realize that you were…commando…"
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A/N: I have an idea for a second chapter. I'll probably post it up soon. XP That was my first crack fic.
Review!?