Title: Don't Cry
Rating: 15+/T (I guess)
Written for Biweekly challenge; Topic: "I feel so miserable without you here, its almost like having you here." -Stephen Bishop in Ciassuvitello
Author: lunaryu
Fandom: Katekyou Hitman Reborn
Disclaimer: Amano Akira is the Goddes in KHR who creates and own everything…
Pairing/Characters: Present!Reborn X Tyl!Lambo. Tsuna, Yamamoto, Gokudera
Genre: Romance/angst (very-very angst)
Warning: none (sexually)—well, mention of character death, some psycological problems, and dark, sweetness, and maybe oOC-ness (you decide)
Don't Cry
Day one…
The first time I heard the news that Reborn was dying because of the curse…I really couldn't believe it….
Lambo looked at Yamamoto and Gokudera in utter disbelief. "What did you just say?" the fifteen year old boy who wore cow patterned suit asked, still unable to cath what the older men said.
Yamamoto looked at Lambo sympathetically and Gokudera just scratched his hair in frustration.
"Reborn's dead," the silver haired Italian said sternly, eyes not meeting Lambo, while his spiky haired companion just closed his eyes either from not wanting to see the reaction of the younger teen or from unable to hold his own sadness.
There was a brief silence before Lambo started to chuckle, earning surprised looks by the others. "That's a very funny joke," he said as he closed his eyes, still laughing slightly.
Yamamoto and Gokudera looked at each other, confused. They didn't know how to tell the boy that it was not joke at all.
"Look," Gokudera began, earning atttention from the still laughing Lambo. "I know it's hard…, but it's not a joke," he continued seriously. Yamamoto only nodded, looking very sad.
Lambo stopped laughing gradually as he looked at Gokudera and Yamamoto's dejected look. Then he frowned. "Hey, even though I really want to kill him, it doesn't mean I want him dead. You don't have to tease me like that…." The boy said slowly, trying to seek the crack of their expression. "It's a lie, right?" he asked again, looking rather worried now.
Gokudera and Yamamoto didn't say anything as they looked at another way.
"It's a lie…. It must be a lie…! I haven't even met him yet after this mission and killed him! So why's he dead!?" Lambo shouted now, unable to accept the news.
"Lambo—,"
"NO!" Lambo covered his ears and closed his eyes. "I don't want to hear it! You're lying!"
The boy just didn't want to hear it anymore and he ran away.
It's a lie…! It must have been a lie! Tsuna, yes, if I find Tsuna, I will see Reborn again! He's always beside him!
Lambo hurriedly ran to Tsuna's room and he barged in immediately only to find the brown haired young man crying beside his bed, hands clutching a hand of a cretain black haired man lying on top of the bed.
Lambo widened his eyes staring at the scene. Even though Tsuna's hard sobs were filling the room, Lambo couldn't hear him. He was mezmerized by the view the man on the bed who closed his eyes entirely, not even flinching at the loud bang of the door.
He looked like sleeping.
Lambo didn't move from the doorstep. He continued staring at the sleeping man in bed, not aware of Tsuna's motion as the older man hugged him, still crying so sadly, so miserably.
Lambo didn't hear what Tsuna was saying. Heck, he didn't even aware if he was still conscious or not. His mind was not cathing it up.
Reborn's dead…, that's impossible, right? He's Reborn…whose life force like a crockroach. No matter how many times I tried to kill him, he would not die. He couldn't die…!
Lambo didn't feel sad. Heck, he wouldn't be saddened by the death of his mortal enemy; his hateful self-proclaimed rival who always tortured him mentally and physically every single moment. He just couldn't believe that oh-so-mighty-Reborn was there, lying lifelessly.
He doesn't die….
His mind kept telling him the same thing. He didn't know why, but he felt that somehow, Reborn could just wake up and kick him again while spiting those foul insults to him.
"Stupid cow!"
See, he could hear him just fine. Reborn didn't die. He just slept.
Lambo didn't say anything and didn't move as Tsuna never let him go from his tight hug.
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Day Two…
"Millfiore is making their move," Gokudera spoke quitely, but tensely.
Vongola had been discussing the matter of the new mafia family, Millifiore, which was built recently and started to get in Vongola's nerves. They had initiated some actions which could be regarded as a challenge to Vongola Famiglia. Thus before their existence became a threat to Vongola, the guardians and their boss, a.k.a. Tsuna, decided to take action first.
"What should we do to them?" Yamamoto asked.
"I will not approve violent action," Tsuna said quickly before Gokudera started to rambling his idea of blowing them up or such.
Gokudera who had opened his mouth closed it again while Yamamoto only laughed.
"Then, negotiation?" Lambo suggested slowly while lifting his hand.
"That would be dangerous," Gokudera objected, but he didn't yell as usual.
Even though Gokudera didn't show it, he actually was still worried of Lambo's condition. The idiot cow didn't cry at all after Reborn's death and he never brought the subject of him. He neither asked nor questioned anything. He just…kept silent, and whatever he was thinking, no one knew.
Tsuna looked at Lambo quietly before he closed his eyes again. "But Lambo's suggestion can be considered as an idea too, since we will not use our forcefull strength to Millifiore," he said, smiling a bit, but the hint of grief still plastered in his expression.
"Yeah, I think it's good," Yamamoto also said in spirit, trying to lighten the mood.
"Ryohei hasn't come back has he?" Tsuna asked.
"Yes, he's still with the Varia," Gokudera answered.
"What about Hibari?" Yamamoto also asked.
"Ah, he's never home as always and I don't know where he is or what he's doing now since that bird-bastard always moves on his own will and never bothers to give a single damn report to our HQ," Gokudera fumed in annoyance. Yamamoto only laughed it off again.
"Leave Mukuro, he has his own plan," Tsuna mumbled slowly as he looked at the paper again and sighed. "At a time like this…if Reborn were here, he could at least give us a suggestion," Tsuna closed his eyes and leant his back to the chair.
Gokudera and Yamamoto flinched at the mention of the late Arcobaleno's name. Tsuna was also surprised at what he just said and clasped his mouth with his hand. "Sorry…," he muttered quietly as he glanced worriedly at Lambo again.
"What?" Lambo of course noticed this and asked, looking completely confused of why everyone made a big fuss of his feeling. He didn't even feel anything of that matter, and it started to get in his nerves the way everyone treated him after Reborn's death. It was as if they pitied him, as if he were the most miserable person in the world.
Tsuna didn't say anything and just looked at him in the eye.
That look.
Lambo didn't know why, but Tsuna's eyes looked like he was waiting for something. He just didn't know what he was waiting for.
Tsuna closed his eyes and sighed again. "It's nothing," he said slowly as everyone got back at the matter at hand.
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Day Three…
At night, Lambo couldn't sleep. He just didn't feel sleepy. When he closed his eyes, a view of that man always came back to his mind and he didn't feel like sleeping anymore. He kept awake until dawn and then got out his room to do his task.
Even after his death he keeps bugging me. He's really annoying…!
Lambo thought slowly, feeling irritated as he ate his breakfast with Tsuna, Gokudera, and Yamamoto.
Looking at Lambo's annoyed look, Tsuna asked. "What's wrong, Lambo?"
"Nah, it's just an annoying dream," Lambo lied, not looking at Tsuna.
"Really? What kind of dream?" Tsuna asked again while chuckling.
"Someone bugged me even after he was not around anymore," Lambo didn't lie this time, well, minus the dream part, and minus the name of that someone, but Tsuna could easily guess who it was.
"I see…," Tsuna didn't continue the conversation as he continued eating, leaving Gokudera and Yamamoto confused of what they're talking about.
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Day Four…
"Why did you keep appearing even though you're gone!?" Lambo snapped suddenly while throwing a glass on the wall, making a loud crashing sound, surprising everyone in the room.
"Lambo?" Tsuna looked at him worriedly.
"You're dead already! Stop bugging me! Stop talking to me! Stop making my life more miserable than you've made it when you're alive, you sadist bastard!" Lambo kept yelling hysterically, making Gokudera and Yamamoto and of course, Tsuna, panic.
"Lambo!" Tsuna hurriedly held Lambo's hand and forced him to look at Tsuna. Lambo lifted his face at the older man who looked at his eyes intently. "Talk," Tsuna said sternly. "Talk to me. Talk to us! What are you thinking? What are you feeling right now?" he continued, forcing him to open up, to vomit all his stress.
Still, Lambo didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say. The bastard's dead. He should have no wory that Reborn would make him suffer anymore, but why…? Why did it feel so painful right now?
What's wrong with him?
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Day Five…
Tsuna kept Lambo under surveilance of his subordinates after the burts out the day before. He didn't let the boy be alone, even when he's taking a bath.
Lambo still would not talk to Tsuna about his feelings. He's so stubborn, pissing Tsuna off sometimes. Tsuna knew that Lambo received the most damage of Reborn's death, but the boy just didn't realize it. He couldn't move on. He kept thinking that Reborn was still here, mocking him even though he's already dead.
It was worrying. If Lambo didn't accept it soon…he would….
Tsuna sighed. "Why aren't you here when I need you, Reborn…?" he murmured sadly.
Ah, he had to wake up soon too. He also felt the loss. It's really painful, especially if you're really close as tutor and disciple.
Reborn and Lambo's closeness…was different from Reborn and Tsuna's. They're unique. Rival, friends, enemy, everything in one…. Though, might be Lambo thought it as his own self-proclaimed consideration. He never knew Reborn's true feeling.
But…before he passed away…Reborn said it.
"Tell him…. Don't cry…."
Damn it…. Lambo just didn't want to ask. He didn't want to know, didn't want to accept this fact. He doesn't cry…. I can't tell him don't cry if he doesn't even cry, can I?
"The fact that you're dead…is so hard to believe even for me at first…." Tsuna covered his face, feeling like crying again. Still, as sad as Tsuna felt, he could move on in the end. He could accept his death entirely and only kept the memories of that man inside him.
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Day Six…
Tsuna couldn't hold it anymore. Lambo didn't talk to him or to anyone, and he never would. The young boss brought him to talk one on one, where they could be alone to share their grieves together.
"Reborn's dead," Tsuna stated firmly.
"I know that," Lambo said indiferently.
"He's not here anymore."
"That should be,"
"Then why are you acting as if he's still here?" Tsuna said desperately.
"He's here" was the shocking answer from the boy after a long pause. "He just doesn't show himself."
Tsuna looked at Lambo as if he were about to cry. "Lambo…I can't take it anymore," Tsuna suddenly hugged the boy. "Don't act like this, please…. You've made everyone worried…."
"But it's true…. He's here and he will never leave me. He'll keep insulting me and make me angry. He's always like that…."
Tsuna kept hugging the boy who didn't show any expression and then, "He had a message for you before he passed away," he said slowly. "Even if you don't want to hear it, I will tell you," he added before the boy could protest.
Tsuna loosened the hug and looked at Lambo's blank eyes. "Don't cry," Tsuna said slowly, "that's his message for you."
Lambo, slowly but surely, widened his eyes before suddenly a drop of tear fell from his eye. Then, tears began to fill the other eye, and then rain of tears dripping one by one from his enchanting mesmerizing emerald eyes, wetting his cheeks, as if all the feeling he kept in his heart errupted and turned into his tears.
Tsuna looked at Lambo's crying state in relief. "At least…you cry…," he said softly while hugging the sobbing boy gently, trying to reassure him, but he also wanted him to cry more, spilling his stress out, so he could smile again after he moved on.
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Day Seven…
Lambo couldn't believe his eyes when he saw the small figure on the Vongola Underground HQ. The yellow pacifier, that cute little round face, those round buns, and that sadistic smirk…it was as if he's seeing a dream.
He had just been able to sleep last night after Tsuna's consoling, but now…WTF was fate playing at him actually?
"Reborn…." Lambo could only manage to say his name in the mids of his shock.
Reborn only looked at him in a glance, but deliberately ignored him afterwards, pissing Lambo so much he wanted to attack him with his Electrico Cornata.
"Don't ignore me, you-bastard!" Lambo yelled at him and wanted to attack him as suddenly the little infant jumped and landed a hard kick on his head. As a result, Lambo's face kissed the ground. He whimpered slightly, almost crying beause of the pain.
Reborn landed safely in front of Lambo's head and then he smiled softly when Lambo didn't see him. He patted Lambo's head gently, freezing Lambo's body entirely.
"Don't cry, stupid cow, you're still cry baby as always," he said.
However, when Lambo heard his voice, he couldn't bear it anymore and started to cry again while mumbling "Tolerate…."
Why…, why can you influence me like this…?
"It's painful, bastard…!" 'sobs'
Why…even though when you're around you're always tormenting me and making my life miserable….
"You can be more gentle, sadistic creature…!" 'sobs-sobs'
Why did I feel so misreable without you…as if it were almost like having you around?
"Why would I want to be gentle? You're just stupid cow," Reborn mocked him again.
"Bastard…, you're really…!" Lambo sobbed again sometimes before he could look at Reborn again in his face.
Reborn was looking at him, his expression was unreadable, but he was looking at him intently. Then the infant suddenly put his hand on Lambo's cheek before he smirked. "I am here," he said lowly and kissed Lambo's lips before quickly released him and went away, leaving the red-faced lambo alone on the floor, confused.
END
A/N: Confusing…. I myself is confused. Poor lambo…TT Well, hope you like it though…. Comments?
With love,
Lunaryu~~~