Summary: Edward's secret continues to elude Bella, but she's managed to come up with quite a few guesses. This is one of her not-so-good theories about him, and the consequences of having them revealed....(crack!) EDITED, with an epilogue at the end to really finish it off. Specially written for those who were asking for more...I hope this is enough. And thank you so much for reviewing! XD

A/N: This is an alternate scene for Chapter 5: Blood Type, sosome of the lines at the start were taken from Twilight.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer's characters have come down with a terrible case of OOC-itis, so don't take this seriously...

Consider yourself warned!

Misinterpretation

Anticipation and impatience buzzed in her veins as she and Jessica entered the cafeteria. She wanted to see his face, to see if he'd gone back to the cold, indifferent person he'd been for the last several weeks. But this time, at least, she would be prepared. She would understand if that happened again – a brainwave had hit her during Trig like Tyler Crow's van would have...should have. She couldn't believe she hadn't seen it before – it all made so much sense now! It was all I could do from yelling it out in to the class.

Jessica was babbling on and on about her dance plans, completely unaware of Bella's inattention. Completely unaware of her earth-shattering revelation about Edward. Not that Bella minded, really. Edward would probably want to her to keep it to herself – and she would, of course, respect his privacy, but then... she chewed her lip, lost in thought. Was it really the right thing to do? Didn't she have the responsibility of telling someone?

It was a dilemma Bella continued to ponder as she and Jessica moved up through the canteen line. The question of how and when to bring it up, however, was eventually taken out of her hands in a way even Alice had failed to foresee...

"Tell me one theory."

Whoops. No!

"Just one theory – I won't laugh."

That wasn't quite what she was dreading... Still, she had plenty of other, dumber theories that qualified for 'will-be-laughed-at-and-have-tomatoes-thrown-at' category.

"Yes, you will."

He looked down, and then glanced up at Bella through long black lashes, ochre eyes scorching.

"Please?" he breathed, leaning toward her.

Bella's mind went blank. Just what had they been talking about again? A second later, what little was still functioning in her mind piped up helpfully. Oh right, that was it. However, doubt began to sow its seeds. If he could act like this...maybe she was wrong after all...?

"Er, what?" she asked, still reeling.

"Please tell me just one little theory." His eyes still burned.

Somewhat dazed, her mind leapt to the latest theory she'd been pondering, sense of self-preservation missing in action...

"Y-You're emo!"

Excuse me...wait, what?

What?!

For the first time in a long while (a very long while, mind you), Edward's mind emptied of coherent thought, inside and outside. He honestly had not been expecting that – bitten by radioactive spider, sure; Superman's younger brother, also heard of, but this, this was...!

His jaw dropped as he spluttered helplessly (oh, how the tables had turned) – well, he would have, had he been a lesser person...but Edward Cullen was a vampire (a most definitely-not-emo one – geez, where did she get these ideas from?), and as a proud vampire, he had a image to uphold - and more importantly, a secret to keep. (The real one.) Thus his jaw stayed clamped shut.

The tables around them fell silent, but his mind now churned with their thoughts.

Oh my god...

I can't believe that...

Why didn't I think of that before? For shame...

It all makes sense now... He could hear Jessica's voice as her mind went a mile a minute, gears whirring and clicking. The rumour mill was back in business.

Wait...they actually believed her?

Edward. Emo. Edward. Emo. Edward. Emo...

...I think my brain just exploded.

You genius, Bella! This guy has voices in his head, telling him stuff no one else can hear...sucked in, Edward!

Noo... Edward groaned inwardly: not his family as well, if Emmett's loud guffaw was anything to go by. Edward could hear his family's table jump as his brother pounded the table repeatedly with his fist. With a sinking feeling, he turned his head in his family's direction and saw Rosalie smirking at him, a smug look on her face. He didn't need to read her mind to know what she was thinking...I told you that girl was going to be nothing but trouble.

Alice's mind was not much better. I'm sorry.

He gritted his teeth. How come she hadn't seen that one coming? (The wobble in her tone as she stifled a giggle didn't help matters.)

His attention snapped back to the girl sitting in front of him. Her face flushed, warm red blood flooding her cheeks...(Edward determinedly pulled his mind away from that train of thought) and lowered her head, a curtain of brown hair falling forward to veil her. As usual, his gold eyes had befuddled her, making her blurt things out. "I'm sorry – I didn't mean for it come out that way..."

He snorted. Like that made anything better.

Her head snapped up as she gazed at him, earnest. "It's not a laughing matter, Edward. I'm serious. You shouldn't have to go through this yourself..."

She trailed off, quailing under his fiery glare. So did the table as one of his hands clenched around it.

Trying to calm himself (and save the table from further harm), he took a deep breath. "And how, pray tell, did you get this idea?" He was proud that he managed to keep his voice even, shaking ever so slightly at the end.

"Well...um, y-you have to admit that it all makes sense when you think about it-"

"It most certainly does not." His tenuous, momentary peace shattered into a thousand little pieces, self control be damned.

"It does, you know." Bella continued as though he hadn't said a word. Her voice strengthened, her gaze cleared and she looked him directly in the eye – why, oh why, did she have to choose now to become self-assured?

"Hear me out, okay? It does make sense – why you miss school on sunny days, why you always wear long sleeved clothes that cover up your arms (indeed, Edward thought, glancing down at his light blue shirt, he was), why you saved me from Tyler, why you didn't want to be friends with me – why you said that you were 'dangerous' and a 'bad guy'...but Edward, being depressed doesn't make you bad! It's important to tell people about it, to talk to them – I mean, sure, I understand why you didn't want me to know...but still..."

To put it simply, Edward was flabbergasted. And furious.

He had to put a stop to this before it spiraled out of control.

Crash!

Too late. He might as well start running back to Alaska...

He looked over the girl's shoulder and groaned inwardly. Bella followed his gaze and saw Emmett had now progressed – or regressed, in Edward's opinion – to rolling on the floor, howling hysterically like a hyena. Between gasps for air, he managed to spit out a few words, "...Edward...emo...now that's a good one...oh my god...AHAHAHAHA..."

The rest of his family weren't much better – traitors! The lot of them! Rosalie was snickering, shoulders shaking with mirth. Alice was minutes away from losing it. Beside her, Jasper shrugged calmly but even Bella could see that he was not sorry at all. Perhaps it was the smug smile on his mouth that was quirking dangerously into a grin that gave it away. At last, someone to join his suffering...Muahahahaha!

Edward fumed, beyond words.

He was doomed.

Hell suddenly seemed mild compared to what he would be in for...

No one was really surprised when the youngest member of the Cullen family didn't show up to Biology class that afternoon

The next day, it appeared that a new social sub-culture had sprung up in the school. It should be noted that although the small town of Forks had been fairly immune from the epidemic of cliques and queen bees that afflicted their urban cousins...they took exception to the Cullens in this case.

In the halls of Forks High School was...

Black. Everywhere. With the odd navy, grey and brown splashed around.

(Yesterday afternoon, the few clothes stores and op shops in Forks and Port Angeles had soon emptied of all the dark clothing they had.)

Chiefly among them was Mike, fully embracing his inner emo, eyes lined with rings of black eyeliner, angsty music turned up high on his mp3 player, the 'cool' persona he had been carefully cultivating for two years discarded and trampled over.

The teachers could only shake their heads in quiet bewilderment as they looked on, though some were secretly rejoicing at having their suspicions validated, Mr Varner among them. Not so perfect after all, eh, Mr I'm-Too-Good-For-Biology-Class?

Edward was nowhere to be seen.

Rumour had it that Edward had driven to school in his Volvo, taken one look at the trail of students dressed in varying shades of predominantly dark (after all, not everyone had been lucky enough to get in quick to buy black clothes) colours and had hastily slid back in and driven off.

Although, rumour also had it that Edward had nursed a secret love for Jessica all this time...but was too chicken and proud too say so...

(Moral of the story: do not trust Jessica. And do not underestimate the power of gossip – especially from a woman scorned!)

Bella smiled in satisfaction as she beheld the pall that had descended over her schoolmates. This was payback for that stupid Tyler-Crow-prom business. Her smile faltered a little as she considered the fact that Edward's denial and utter shock probably meant that it wasn't true.

Damn.

She was no closer to finding out what Edward was.

Oh well, back to the drawing board then...