Disclaimer: D. Gray-man is the rightful property of Katsura Hoshino-sensei.
Spoiler warning: Up to 191st Night or so in the story. Up to 197th Night in the PS at the bottom.
Please enjoy :)
They were sitting next to each other, their eyes closed, breathing deep and even. Their legs tangled and backs straight, as required the Lotus position, hands lying freely on knees which were pointing in opposite directions, their eyes closed tightly to cut off any visual distractions coming from the outside world, each of the two was lost in their own concentration.
This tranquil picture, consisting of two black-haired teenagers, a boy and a girl, meditating together on the floor of a neat room decorated with a minimalist sense of style, had remained unchanged for about an hour. It had been then that the girl had knocked to her older friend's room, shaking noticeably, and he had let her in without a single question, motioned at her to sit with him and resumed the previous activity. She had smiled through tears at this invitation and taken her place by the boy's side, nodding thankfully.
Bright sunrays coming through the open window fell on their pale faces, both marked with expressions of peace and relaxation.
But one couldn't meditate forever, even if that one happened to be Kanda Yu. He frowned as one especially mean sunbeam from the slowly subsiding disc poked at his eye; turning his head somewhat to dodge the ray, he lifted his eyelids a crack and glanced at the nearly motionless figure of Lenalee.
She looked so calm now, Kanda guessed that meditation had done the trick and allowed her to get rid of the anxiety, worry, fear, or whatever it was that had made her run over to his room again. Really, as if his place was some sort of refuge for the distressed.
Lenalee claimed she found his company comforting. She was glad he never asked her questions, and on his part Kanda was glad she usually didn't demand that he listen while she would pour her heart out onto him. So as long as she wasn't disturbing him, the Japanese exorcist would accept having his younger colleague around. Lately, he'd even realised he was beginning to like her being nearby; at least he didn't have to expect her invading his solitude any moment.
Either feeling him watching her, or for some other reason, Lenalee blinked several times, adjusting to the level of brightness in the room, and looked at Kanda. When their gazes met, the girl smiled.
"Thank you, Kanda," she said quietly.
"Whatever for?" he retorted, suddenly irritated – partly at her for thanking him, partly at himself for the something her smile evoked somewhere in his chest. "I did nothing."
"Maybe you did," she agreed, grinning a bit wider, "but I wanted to thank you nonetheless."
"Che." Idiotic. What was she thinking? But that strange sensation wasn't disappearing, quite the opposite – it continued to intensify with each and every second Kanda spent watching Lenalee. And surprisingly enough, he didn't want to avert his eyes.
This was not the first occasion he'd felt like this around the Chinese girl, yet he had always tried to ignore it, not to dwell on it, get over it. He would tell himself that there was no time to ponder on such unimportant details, that even if he enjoyed looking at her it didn't mean anything, that it was a result of temporary confusion, and the similar.
What Kanda had never admitted to himself until now was that the emotions caused by Lenalee's presence felt so strangely, unsettlingly familiar, echoing in his heart with misty recollections he didn't feel like analysing.
The moment the realised that fact, he also realised something else.
It wasn't anything he hadn't known before, or anything vital for that matter; it was so obvious that he had learnt long ago not to pay attention, knowing all too well no good would come out of focusing on them too much. They simply were there, and nothing he might do could change that.
And yet now the awareness of them being there struck him so rapidly.
He and Lenalee were sitting next to each other, and the floor around them was carpeted with pink Lotus flowers, ephemerally fragile under piercing sunrays which seemed to pass through their fine petals. Kanda could almost smell their delicate fragrance.
It was as if… they were in a garden. A little garden.
The swordsman's face twisted in a grimace upon that reflection. What the hell was wrong with him? Was he being nostalgic all of sudden? But nostalgic for what? So maybe sentimental? But why did it feel so… warm? Crap.
Lenalee noticed the change in his face expression, backed off, blushed, realising they had been staring at each other past five minutes without exchanging a word, and finally started to stand up.
"I-I think I'll be going then, sorry for bothering you, Kanda, and thanks again."
The younger exorcist bowed slightly and turned to leave, while the owner of the room couldn't help but admire the lightness of her gracious movements, forgetting himself again. Her steps meandered among the blossom, not even once catching onto a petal or a leaf; just as thought she could see them; that impression somehow made the flowers appear more substantial.
A vague sensation of familiarity washed over Kanda one more time; a girl among Lotus flowers… in a little garden… together…the sun…the fragrance…but…It was a dream.
Not until she had reached the door did he shake off this stupid stupor.
"…Wait…" Now Kanda, too, jumped to his feet and walked through the rosy bloom towards Lenalee, urged by the impulsive need to confirm that she wasn't a dream, wasn't a part of this illusionary garden she seemed to fit so well in; and before he knew it, he was standing right in front of her, and the girl's hand, which lay on the handle, was covered by his larger palm.
Lenalee gave Kanda a surprised glance and quickly looked away, evidently nervous about their new closeness. He observed her cheeks turn darker shades of pink and felt traitorous heat creep onto his own features, but neither of them withdrew the hand.
"…You don't have to go," he muttered when the awkwardness of the silence suspended in the air between them became too obvious.
"Um… okay," she replied uncertainly, and then the mutual embarrassment of the two exorcists took over again.
The touch of Lenalee's hand was distractingly soft, at the same time conveying to Kanda both her physical existence and its delicateness.
"Lenalee," he spoke, his voice quiet and softer than he would ever think possible, but even so a weak thrill traveled down the girl's spine and only after it had passed did she answer, without raising her eyes:
"Y-yes, Kanda…?"
Lenalee let out a small 'ah' when Kanda's fingertips brushed against her face and lifted it gently until her dark violet eyes, now wide-open in lovely confusion, met his jet-black ones. The warm emotion infused him with doubled force, this time carrying the reassuring notion of reality and stability his elusive 'memories' so painfully lacked.
He leant further, closing the distance between their flushed faces; his long side bangs fell on Lenalee's bare shoulders as he began kissing her on the lips.
The girl's arms wrapped around Kanda's neck as she responded, shyly at first; yet soon enough the shyness got forgotten and the kiss deepened, washing any conscious thoughts away from the exorcists' minds.
It was only the need for air that eventually made them pull apart, however reluctantly, and open the eyes they couldn't remember shutting. Silence enveloped them anew, but it was no longer awkward; staring into each other's eyes, they shamelessly indulged in it, putting off the moment when it was broken.
"…Well then, once again… Thank you, Kanda," Lenalee whispered, and smiled sweetly before laying her head on Kanda's shoulder.
"You needn't thank me, idiot…" he murmured, gathering her into an embrace.
"Maybe…," a quite laugh escaped the girl's mouth, "but I wanted to."
Kanda chuckled lightly into hair. "Che, let it be…"
Over Lenalee's head he could still observe the garden blooming around them, the garden she will never see; but it bothered him no longer.
With this girl in his arms, how could he ever worry about illusions of the past again?
Ba-Kanda, don't you worry about gardens! Worry about your supervisor now…
I want to write KanLena, but it feels like I can't really grasp the gist of it… next time it'll probably be Lenalee's POV. Still, I hope this one wasn't all that bad.
Please review~!
(PS Isn't the latest chapter an ideal example of fanservice? They're mutating AND shirtless! Oh, and how lovely that Allen decided the best way to save the world is impaling himself on Mugen. I've been waiting for this all along. xD)